Introduction
In my old age, I believe that the wish of all the elderly is to hope that their children can go home and see each other frequently. In this way, the elderly will not feel so lonely and lonely in their hearts. At the same time, the desire for family affection in their hearts will also be satisfied accordingly. The most important thing is that if the elderly encounter something unexpected, their children will also know it as soon as possible.
To put it bluntly, when a person is old, as long as the elderly are often with their children, this is the greatest happiness for the elderly. Logically speaking, in this case, if the elderly’s children run home every few days, then the elderly should be extremely happy and excited.
On the surface, things should be like this, but the actual situation is not the case. Because some of us elderly children often run home, they are really careful, but some of us elderly children often have ulterior motives when they go home often, or have despicable selfishness. When encountering such children, only the elderly’s heart pain is known to them.
72-year-old Mr. Tao met such a child. Originally, after his wife passed away, he lived alone in his later years, but later his son returned home almost every other week. In the eyes of outsiders, he should be extremely happy in his heart if his son did this, but Mr. Tao said that his son often went home, which not only made him unable to be happy, but he was still very sad. It even seemed that this had become his nightmare in his later years! What the hell is going on? Let’s listen to Mr. Tao’s story together.
Contributor: 72-year-old Mr. Tao
My name is Tao Weiming. I am 72 years old this year. I am a real rural person. I have never fallen in love with school since I was a child. In addition, I was born to be a school material. Therefore, after barely finishing junior high school, I chose to go home and learn to make tofu with my parents. At that time, it was very hard to make tofu, and everything depends on manpower. Fortunately, I finally persisted.
At the beginning, the tofu I made was only sold in our village. Later, the transportation became more and more convenient, so I rode my bicycle to the village to sell it. Although selling tofu was also hard, fortunately, selling tofu can support our family. Therefore, I was more and more in pain and happiness.
When I was selling tofu in the countryside one day, I met my current wife. At that time, she worked as a waiter for someone in a hotel. She saw me being down-to-earth and hardworking, but I saw that she was beautiful and kind. Later, under the introduction of the matchmaker, the two of us decided to date together for a while. During this period, I was very satisfied with her and she did not pick any other problems in me.
Therefore, after two years of dating, we officially got married. After getting married, in order to make our future life better, we rented a storefront house on the street in the village to sell tofu. At the beginning, we just sold tofu, and later we also sold other soy products, and our business became better and better.
Three years after getting married, my wife gave birth to a son for me. Since we were busy with business, I sent my son to the countryside and asked my parents to help us take care of the children. The parents agreed immediately. In normal times, their parents treated their grandson very much. Basically, they bought whatever his grandson wanted, and they had almost never rejected any of his requests.
This way, and my wife and I usually distance ourselves from discipline for our son. My son has been particularly willful and lazy since childhood, and has developed bad habits. But at that time, I didn't agree with it. Instead, I felt that my son was still young and he would be fine when he grew up.
The son dropped out of school early and stayed at home. He usually did nothing and just followed a group of friends to eat and drink outside every day. I asked him to learn to sell tofu from me. He thought it was hard and tiring to sell tofu, so he asked him to learn other craftsmanship so that he could support his family in the future, but he refused something and said that he couldn't learn it. In fact, he was just lazy.
Later, my son reached the age of getting married and starting a family. I bought him a new wedding house and car. It took a lot of effort to marry his wife to his wife. For this reason, my wife and I spent all the great savings earned by selling tofu. But we thought that as long as our son was happy, it didn’t matter no matter how much money we spent, after all, we only had such a son.
After my son got married, he did nothing all day and did not find a class for himself. He either went out to play cards or found someone to drink. His daughter-in-law complained. Later, I really had no choice but to ask a friend to find him a driving job at a certain unit. The job was very relaxed and comfortable, and the salary was also very good.
At the beginning, my son could still go to and from get off work on time every day, but not long after, he fished for three days and ran the Internet for two days. Later, the unit where his son was in could not stand him, so he had to fire him because he was too lazy.
After my son had no job, he took the initiative to find me and said he would follow me to sell tofu and try to learn my skills in making tofu. At that time, my wife and I were very happy and felt that my son was a prodigal son and he would not exchange money for it. For this reason, our family went to a big hotel outside to have a meal.
, what I never expected was that my son wanted to learn to make tofu from me was fake, and it was real to try to occupy my money for selling tofu. At the beginning, I didn’t notice this. After all, he was my biological son, and I couldn’t stare at him every day like a thief. It was not until later that I discovered that my son actually secretly carried me on his back and took at least 200,000 yuan away.
My son's actions at that time really made me angry, but I was afraid of yelling jokes from others everywhere, so I quietly drove my son away and told him that I would never want to see him again in the future. After that, my wife and I continued to sell our tofu.
Decades have passed, my wife and I are old, and we really can't do it anymore. In addition, in the years of selling tofu, we have also had a lot of savings in our hands, which is enough for my wife and I to retire in the second half of our lives, so we both prepared to stop and start to enjoy life.
To be honest, since we were with my wife, since we were busy making and selling tofu every day, we really didn’t have the time and energy to enjoy life well. I originally thought that now, our wishes could finally come true, but after only four years of such a life, my wife passed away.
After my wife passed away, I was heartbroken and did not choose to find a new partner for myself, nor did I choose to go to a nursing home. Instead, I decided that I would live a solitary life in the future. Anyway, I knew that my son would definitely not be able to count on him.
I was living a good life alone, but later, my son came to me and kept apologizing to me, saying that what he had done was too much and he knew he was wrong. He hoped that I could forgive him. If he didn't help, he would be my biological son. And his words had already reached this point. What else could I do? I can only choose to forgive him.
So my relationship with my son returned to the same state as before. I was very happy and felt that my good days were finally getting old. My relationship with my son was also very harmonious. My son would choose to go home to visit me every once in a while. I was originally because my son really knew he was wrong, but later I realized that my son did this with ulterior motives.
At the beginning, my son went home almost once a month. During this period, my son washaved properly, but later, my son was abnormal. Every time he went home, he either said he was tight on his hands or that he urgently needed money when he had difficulties. Then he borrowed money from me in this name, ranging from a few thousand to tens of thousands. At that time, I agreed without thinking too much.
Perhaps he tasted the sweetness, and after that, he went home more and more frequently, especially in the past two or three years. I even remember that in a few months, he actually went home once every seven days, and he had only one purpose, that is, to make up various reasons to borrow money for me, and the amount of money he borrowed was getting bigger and bigger. Now he borrowed money for me, and the number of money for me is at least tens of thousands each time.
Although I have a lot of savings at hand at present, my savings are all reserved for me to use in my future retirement. Besides, the frequency and amount of money I borrow every day like him, no matter how much savings I have, I can't stand his calculations and troubles? What if it goes on for a long time?
For this reason, I advised him more than once that if you want to live a good life, you must rely on your hard work and struggle. You just know that "squeezing" from me is not possible at all, but he still does his own way. Every time I don't agree to his request for borrowing money, he either quarrels with me or makes a fuss with me. For a long time, I have been a person with good face because I am afraid that others will know jokes, so I can only let his conspiracy succeed again and again.
In the eyes of outsiders, my son is home every seven days. He is here to visit me. He is a "big filial son." I should be happy in my heart, but in fact, I feel very sad. I can only experience the various grievances I have suffered by myself. I don’t know when to live like this? I really hope my son will never go home again, because every time he goes home, it is a nightmare for me. It is really difficult for me. What should I do?
Xiaowei Conclusion
Mr. Tao's story makes us all understand that now that his son is returning home once every seven days. Not only is he not happy, but he also feels very sad. The main reason is that the purpose of his son going home so frequently is not to be filial to accompany and take care of him. On the contrary, his son just wants to "limit his parents." In this way, Mr. Tao naturally cannot be happy. Perhaps he only has endless sadness and depression, but then again, Mr. Tao's son's approach is certainly hateful, but if Mr. Tao did not blindly indulge his son and knew how to reject his son's unreasonable requests, how could the matter develop to such a serious point today?
Therefore, my personal suggestion is that our parents must establish a correct view of their children. If they find any bad signs of their children, they must completely kill them in the cradle and prevent them from getting out of the blue. Parents must stop when helping their children. Appropriate selfishness is not only good for their children, but also an effective protection for themselves. Parents should know how to refuse their sons' various dependents and hiccups. One's indulgence will only make things develop in a worse direction. How much property is in their hands? Before the unfair moment, don't let their children know. The most important thing is that when a person reaches his old age, once parents find that their children are unreliable, they must solve their pension problems as soon as possible. Do you think this is the reason?
