Yesterday, my junior high school classmate wanted to introduce a girl to me and send a photo of the girl, and it felt OK. But he later said that the girl born in the 1990s is now divorced and her son is 11 years old.
When it comes to children, I still can’t accept it. I am 35 years old this year. I missed several relationships due to personal reasons, which has always been single.
is getting older and older now. With the constant pressure from parents, I also want to find a girl to get married and start a family. I have also dated a few girls before. Some of them thought I was old, and some couldn't accept long-distance relationships, so the marriage was left unresolved.
Many people around me who get married when they are younger than me are looking for second marriages. Some women have one child, and some have two children.
For example, my cousin got married last year. He married a girl of the same age in 1996, but the girl was divorced and brought an 8-year-old daughter. At first, his parents also opposed them being together, but my cousin insisted on being with the girl. His parents had nothing to say, so they could only agree to their marriage. This year, they gave birth to a fat daughter. Every family gathering is the focus because of the cute baby. As for the girls' past, the past is no longer so important.
They can accept it, but when they come to me, they feel uncomfortable in their hearts and can't overcome that hurdle. I think even if I'm single until I'm old, I can't accept taking care of children. I'm not discriminating, nor do I look down on girls who have divorced children, but I am stubborn in my thoughts and mentality and cannot be changed for the time being.
When my classmate saw me expressing my inner thoughts, he felt that I could not accept the girl’s children. That is to say, forget it, because the girl’s first requirement is to accept her children first, otherwise everything else will be free.
After chatting with my classmates, I didn’t have much anxiety about marriage, but suddenly I felt very unsure and had no confidence in my future marriage. Thinking about the children of my peers are already in junior high school and enjoying family life, but I am still worried about finding my partner, and I feel that my life is so failure.
is 35 years old this year, and there are still 5 years left before the age of 40. The room for choice is getting smaller and smaller, especially for middle-aged people like me who are not very outstanding in abilities and conditions.
Really, after losing life, I only know that what I once had was beautiful, I only know that it was ordinary before, but now it is a scarce product now.
Regret and anxiety are useless now. You still need to wait patiently and actively find someone with destiny. Regret is also a growth.
I don’t know where she will be in the future, but I know that before she reaches her, I will meet that better self.
Charlie Munger said: If you want to have something, you must first have the ability to match it. Yes, I cannot have love and marriage yet, which means that my ability does not match, and life still needs to be worked hard. I am already 35 years old. Maybe my tree of life has blossomed and bears a fruit later than others. I can only wait patiently and hopefully for my own spring.
What do you think of the anxiety of being single?
