It can be seen from Zhang Tianai's public recording and accompanying text "Recidivist" that this is not the first time this man has betrayed , and she herself said she had forgiven him.
Why do men still make such mistakes after being forgiven? Does really answer the saying " once will be countless times?"
Today the genius is here to talk to you, What should you do when your partner repeatedly betrays you? Should I choose to forgive?
Someone has done a survey and asked whether they should forgive their partner for betrayal. 90% of people will choose not to forgive, but among these 90% of people, more than half of them say they do not forgive, but their hearts will still soften. , unable to control himself, chose to forgive again under the man's hard words.
Faced with the betrayal of the one we love most, the hysterical anger, the heartbreaking pain, the excruciating sadness, we onlookers can only watch, Only those who have truly experienced it know how much suffering it is, feelings are like shoes , fits or rubs your feet, only you know .
Once you find that your partner has betrayed, it means that the balance of the relationship is no longer balanced. There will be high and low positions in the relationship, and an intimate relationship must be based on an equal position.
Whether you choose to forgive or not, the most important thing is to let yourself learn to deal with the pain and trauma caused by these injuries and to help yourself heal, which is the most important thing to do.
If choose to forgive , even if your mood is temporarily relieved, you will live in suspicion and suspicion every day in the days to come., If the other party doesn’t reply to your messages, you will wonder: Is there a woman around him?
If the other party goes to the toilet for a long time, you will wonder: Is he replying to other women’s messages; The other party will come home later. , you will all fantasize about a big drama . Such suspicion will only make oneself more and more painful.
If choose not to forgive and leave the relationship, the feeling of trusting the other person but being betrayed still exists, and it is very likely that will be carried into the next relationship .
For example, if you start a new relationship, you will always think about: Will he betray me too? Once the other person disappears for a while, you start to associate, and you will involuntarily bring the hurt you suffered in the previous relationship into the current relationship, and you will have all kinds of doubts and distrust, and even control the man in various ways, check your mobile phone to check the location, that is In order to prevent the betrayal of from happening again.
These are just deepening one's own pain What we really need to learn is to make ourselves stronger and feel confident, instead of being obsessed with a relationship .
When encounters betrayal by the other party, you can try to think about
1 from these aspects. Accept the facts and let your emotions calm down.
Many people will lose control of their emotions after discovering their partner's betrayal. They will condemn the man from a moral point of view and yell at . Teachers can also understand this feeling, but they are so angry. Emotions will make each other lose rational communication .
The betrayal is already a fact. No matter how much you scold it, it cannot be changed. Accepting the betrayal of a man has hurt himself. Spending more time on him is just a waste of your emotions. You can't Count on this man to heal your wounds, and don't feel that you are not good enough and don't deserve to be loved.
What you have to do is control your emotions and let yourself think calmly: where is the root of the betrayal and how to deal with it next.
2. Don't believe in men's affectionate dramas and put the initiative in your own hands.
When men are discovered to have been betrayed, most of them will stage an emotional drama to express their sadness and guilt. Guilty , For example, holding you and crying, kneeling on the ground begging you to forgive me, telling you that it was just a momentary impulse, he will only love you in this life, as long as you can forgive him, any compensation will be fine, and he will never do it again. Will do it again.
The reason why he begs for your forgiveness is that you will be soft-hearted and fragile if you believe him affectionate performance, start to persuade yourself , then you will find that is only waiting for you more pain , this is human nature.
Therefore, must put the initiative in his own hands. Whether he wants to leave or continue, he will not let him go, nor should he be easily moved by his affectionate drama.
3. I believe that I will gain a happy relationship.
Whether you choose to separate or continue, you must put more thoughts on yourself and heal yourself. This kind of recovery is the most stable.
After many people experience betrayal, they will fall into a thought that they will never be happy again, and have no hope of love. You must know that the center of your life is yourself, not a man. Maintain confidence in yourself, don't doubt yourself, and always believe in your feelings.
Choosing a relationship is never about torturing yourself, but to make yourself grow and become a better person .
I also have many students. After suffered betrayal, after doing the first few steps, they focused on themselves. Not only did they distract themselves, but their careers also prospered and they became more confident. Finally, they turned back. When I look at this man, he is no longer worthy of me.
Have more confidence and patience in yourself, and live with hope and confidence . Follow your heart, whether you choose to leave or continue,you need to heal your wounds and get out of the shadow of betrayal, only in this way will you gain a happier relationship.
