Living in this big social environment, after experiencing the "war" between my mother, my aunt, and the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law of my neighbors. I once thought that after I got married, I would definitely have a good relationship with my mother-in-law and my daughter-in-law. You must treat your mother-in-law as well as your own mother, and treat the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law as the relationship between mother and daughter.
After my husband and I decided to get married, I did the same thing. For Mother’s Day and birthdays, take your future mother-in-law to the movies, buy clothes, and give gifts. It’s really based on my mother’s standards.
It was okay when we first got married, because we didn’t live together, we could still be calm, respectful and harmonious. Since the birth of the baby, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has not been very good.
As you can imagine, after I took my maternity leave, my mother-in-law said that I couldn't take care of the child, so I quit my job and stayed at home full time. Although I already knew that my mother-in-law would definitely not want to take care of the children, and I would have to stay full time. But when I heard my mother-in-law say no. I was still very sad and cried. I don’t know what I’m sad about, whether I can’t work anymore or whether my mother-in-law can’t help me take care of the kids.
Now that I am working full-time, I will devote myself to raising my children. For more than a year, I have been extremely unhappy with my mother-in-law, and maybe she is too. I've been staying at my parents' house for more than half a year, so out of sight is out of mind.
When the new year came, I was surprised that my mother-in-law asked me to take care of the baby and let me go to work. This also started to repair our mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship.
It has been more than half a year, and our relationship is much better than before. Maybe because of work, my mind is divided into work and I am not at home during the day. Spend less time together. There is no environment for conflicts to breed. My current thinking is that my mother-in-law can help me take care of the baby and I can concentrate on going to work. I don't care about other small things and don't care about them.
Old people have some common problems of her age. For example, like to think too much, be greedy for petty gains, want to be taken seriously, etc..
Then the following is that if you don’t hear her thoughts and thoughts every year, or think that older people are like this, you won’t care about it. During the holidays, it’s time to give red envelopes and buy gifts. I usually buy her favorite food and stuff, and pay more attention to her when she is sick.
In this way, the relationship will be smooth. I concentrate on my work and take care of my kids when I have time. The mother-in-law took care of the baby willingly and no longer sighed.
My experience over the past six months or so is that should not treat her mother-in-law as casually and expect the same as her biological mother, keep an appropriate distance and give her the respect and care she deserves. Life will be much smoother this way. The whole life becomes brighter.
So it’s good to get along well. You really can’t and don’t have to force it.
A colleague of mine has a very harmonious relationship with his mother-in-law. When she gave birth to her child, her mother-in-law was beside her and cried in distress. Because the transportation facilities at home were not enough, her mother-in-law once took her to and from get off work.
When she was taking care of her baby full-time at home, her mother-in-law gave her pocket money every month while she was at work. She is working now, and she also gives money to her mother-in-law after being paid every month . This allowed me to see the sympathy between women, to see that a good relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a two-way street, and to see that there are indeed people who can do things that we cannot.
sees the bright and beautiful side of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
People who can understand: probably know that in fact, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are the people who should understand each other the most. Because we are both mother-in-law, mother, and daughter-in-law, we know each other's situation and difficulties, so we care about each other. If you can understand the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, you can also understand it.
Of course, there are also people who can’t understand it. After all, there is a saying that people of the same sex repel each other. Then they will resent each other and make things difficult for each other.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is an eternal problem. If you are lucky, you can have a relationship that is even better than that of mother and daughter. Those who are unlucky will become enemies. Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are two people. It is useless for one person to be an understanding person, and both parties must be understanding people. Only by going in both directions can there be harmony. So it's normal to get along well or not.
is good, then congratulations on your good luck. It doesn’t matter if you’re not so lucky, just give it a wide berth.
Really, after I understand these things, my whole life becomes brighter. There are more important things to do in life. For example, reading books to study and improve yourself, such as making money to realize your own poetry and future.
Finally, I borrow a sentence from Fu Seoul : If you have a big heart, your life can be a joke.
