family is a shelter from the wind.
When we are tired, our family is our support and gives us the strength to go on; when we are frustrated, our family can support us and be our solid backing.
However, some families not only cannot shelter the wind and rain, but also bring many growing pains to their children.
There is a topic on the Internet called "How much does parental eccentricity hurt?" Many adults wrote down their answers in tears, "accusing" the psychological shadow of parental eccentricity.
One of the respondent wrote:
"Every night I let my boyfriend take a bath first, and then I wash it after he washes it. Because boys are clean and girls are dirty. My mother has always followed me since childhood. Speaking, so I always take a shower after my brother takes a shower."
These experiences of not being loved are likely to affect our lives.
Qiao Zuwang in " Qiao's Sons and Daughters" is not a good and responsible father, but one thing is worthy of recognition is that he is impartial to the five children and treats the five children equally, regardless of son It's still a daughter, no matter whether it is big or small, the weight in Qiao Zuwang's heart is the same.
It is Qiao Zuwang's "a bowl of water and smoothness" that allows the children of the Qiao family to unite and love, and there is no gap. Anyone in the family who is sick and hospitalized is always accompanied by a few children in shifts. Although life is bitter, family affection is very warm.
Parents are partial and hurt not one child but the whole family.
The neglected child is often inferior and insecure; the favored child is easy to be spoiled and arrogant, and the parents will not understand until they are old.
After having a younger brother,I "lost" my parents
When Liu Hui (a pseudonym) was nine years old, his parents risked being punished and gave him a younger brother.
The birth of the younger brother put the family that was not wealthy at all.
Liu Hui no longer wears new clothes. He rarely eats meat except for Chinese New Year. Due to malnutrition, Liu Hui is small and often laughed at by his classmates.
The younger brother Liu Ning (a pseudonym) is much luckier than him. His parents cut down on food and clothing, and they have to order milk, toys, and snacks for Liu Ning. These are things that Liu Hui dare not even think about.
"Brother is young, you have to let him", this is what Liu Hui hears the most. He can only pitifully watch his brother unpack those beautiful snack packages, and swallow silently.
The younger brother Liu Ning is white, fat, and cute. Relatives in the family like him very much. When Liu Ning is three or five years old, he can perform in front of adults without being timid.
Liu Ning's smart and lively make Liu Hui even more inexistent. Liu Hui has been a quiet temperament since childhood, shy and not good at words, and the strong contrast between the two sons completely unbalanced the balance in the minds of parents.
Relatives said that Liu's two sons would cost a lot of money to marry a wife in the future. The father jokingly said: "Children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren. If two tasks are not completed, one will be completed."
Liu Hui, 29 years old Thinking of this sentence, I understood the deep meaning of it. It turned out that his parents had "abandoned" him a long time ago.
The fate of the two brothers is quite different
Parents often praise Liu Ning for his talents, singing at a young age, memorizing poetry, and being a genius child; when it comes to the eldest son Liu Hui, they are disgusted He shook his head, saying that he was "a boring gourd, not as intelligent as Liu Ning."
Relatives also agreed.
The cynicism of these young days,They all became the stings in Liu Hui's heart, piercing his self-esteem over and over again. In order to prove that his intelligence was okay, Liu Hui studied hard and finally got admitted to a 985 in another city, and temporarily escaped from this home.
But because of inferiority complex, Liu Hui did not dare to fall in love and did not dare to speak on stage, leaving many regrets in his youth.
In order to avoid social interaction, Liu Hui spends his time on academics. He won many awards during college.
Liu Ning, who has been held in the palm of his hand since childhood, has mediocre academic performance. Because of trouble in school, his parents are often called by the teacher.
Parents always say, "Liu Ning is still young and ignorant, he will be better when he is old", but he didn't expect it to be much less worrying when he is old; instead, he is the eldest son who has always been mocked for being stupid, and he has made a name for himself.
Liu Hui became a hardware engineer after graduating from university. He was not very sociable, and he was very savvy in terms of technology. He had many opportunities to get a salary increase. At the age of 29, his annual salary had reached 300,000 yuan, which is considered to be an outstanding local. NS.
But Liu Ning did not go to university, but under the arrangement of his parents, he went to work in a factory.
Liu Ning, who was spoiled and raised up, couldn't bear the bitterness of shifting work. He often arrived late and left early, and was almost expelled. It was his father who was rushing to find a relationship and saved Liu Ning's job.
As parents are getting older, it is becoming more and more difficult to earn money from physical work. The old couple gave Liu Ning the four newly built bungalows in the village without discussing them. They said to Liu Hui, "You My brother’s work is not easy. You are in the office, which is much easier than him."
Liu Hui got married, his parents did not leave the house or the car, and did not pay the bride price. This was as early as Liu Hui expected.
My mother-in-law gave me "maternal love"
When Liu Hui was 26 years old,Have a girlfriend.
Wang Yuan (pseudonym) is Liu Hui's colleague. The two have more contact with each other in different departments, and both have a good opinion of each other.
Wang Yuan took a fancy to Liu Hui's hard work, Liu Hui liked Wang Yuan's simplicity and kindness, and after a few months of dating, Wang Yuan asked to see his parents.
At that time, Liu Huicai graduated from university shortly. His salary was not low, but it was unrealistic to take out the down payment and gift. He also had to spend one to two thousand yuan every month to buy medicine for his parents, let alone subsidize Liu privately. Ning's.
With a sense of anxiety, Liu Hui went to see Wang Yuan's mother. Unexpectedly, she was very satisfied with Liu Hui and didn't mind Liu Hui's family conditions, and supported Liu Hui to pay the family monthly.
Wang Yuan's father passed away early, and Wang Yuan's mother had suffered a lot. The mother-in-law said to Liu Hui: "Parents are alive, and it is a blessing to honor them."
Wang Yuan must give Liu Hui every time she goes home Bringing something like stewed meat made by his mother, and eating fragrant food, Liu Hui burst into tears.
The recognition of his mother-in-law gave Liu Hui the confidence to welcome a better life. At the age of 28, he married Wang Yuan. A year later, he took her mother-in-law to live in the city. The 120 square meter house is bright and tidy, and a family of three. It's fun.
"My parents are partial to my younger brother. After 20 years, I have an annual salary of 300,000, and I will bring my mother-in-law to the city." Liu Hui's choice made his parents feel dull and have no confidence to complain.
The "gossip" in small places always spread like wildfire. The gossip about Liu Hui honoring his mother-in-law, but letting his biological parents stay in the village, went viral.
Relatives say that Liu Hui is a white-eyed wolf. Regardless of his parents and younger brother, he is free to study.
Liu Hui ignored these gossips. Only he knew that after work, his parents repeatedly asked Liu Hui for money for Liu Ning. Liu Hui kept one eye closed and tried his best to meet the needs of his parents.It is Liu Ning who deserves his filial piety.
This time, he is no longer afraid of other people's evaluations.
Emotional Conclusion
The different endings of the brothers Liu Hui and Liu Ning are embarrassing.
The youngest son loved by his parents, but everyone, he still needs his parents to clean up the mess when he grows up. The Liu family’s parents slapped him in the face when he "chewed the old" but did not feel ashamed.
The elder son who was despised was calm and sensible, and he was a person that his parents could rely on in his later years, but Liu Hui's heart was broken long ago. He would support his parents in old age, not out of affection, but out of responsibility.
", you should fly to your mountain like a bird" said: "The most powerful factor that determines who you are comes from your heart. No matter who you are, no matter what you have become, then You are the way you are."
Liu Hui has walked out of the shadow of his original family in 20 years. He can already know himself correctly, he is no longer inferior, he is no longer confused, but he and Wang Yuan have reached the point of giving birth. A consensus: only have one child.
(the picture comes from the Internet, if there is any infringement, contact to delete)
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