Different native families, the character of the educated children will also be very different. Therefore, when choosing a match, the most important thing must be the personality and character of the other party.
Women are most afraid of meeting three kinds of men. A kind of "Ma Baonan" who listens to his mother's words and does not have his own opinion. One is suffering from "unhealthy disease", or more serious "straight male cancer". The last one is the most confusing, seemingly smart and capable, hard-working, but filial, low-pitched and face-saving "Phoenix man".
Ma Baonan, in fact, is very good to judge, because three sentences are not separated from his mother, and his essence is easy to be seen through with such a person. Whether it is "unscrupulous" or "straight male cancer", it is generally difficult to conceal it. As long as you touch it, you can feel the other person's selfishness. Only the "Phoenix man", you will think he has a lot of merits, he has potential, and he can consider running a marriage together.
I want to know if he is a "Phoenix man", but it is not too difficult . You can try to ask him about the situation at home, and see how he treats his family, and you can know what kind of man he is.
If there is no principle,To help the family without a bottom line, it is not the responsibility of the elder brother, but to regard himself as a "father." Not only does this happen to himself, but also to let his wife take on such responsibilities, then with him, the life will be very tiring.
", sons and daughters of Joe's family " Qiao Yicheng in this TV series, when Lao Song asked him if he was thinking about having a child, he answered like this: I I have always felt that I am a person with children and daughters. He treats his younger siblings as children, and it is difficult for him to be happy in his marriage.
Chengmin couldn't understand why his girlfriend Ya Ting suddenly broke up. He is the eldest of the family, and helping his younger brother get married is a matter of course. Can't family and friendship coexist?
"My brother first knots" Phoenix man borrowed money to help his brother collect the lottery.
Chengmin has a younger brother named Chengjie. The two are two years apart and grew up together. Chengmin and Ya Ting have been in love for more than three years, and they are also discussing marriage recently. Chengjie also has a girlfriend, and the relationship between the two is also very close.
two brothers are going to get married,But the family conditions are average, there is an old house, and the parents don't have much savings, so they can't cope with the betrothal gifts of two people. Therefore, my mother held a family meeting and said something like this: " Chengjie is a younger brother, and his girlfriend’s family conditions are better, so I don’t give more gifts. I am afraid that my mother’s family will not follow me. After the younger brother got married, talk about Seongmin’s marriage ".
The family agreed on this, and Chengmin also said to Ya Ting: " , my brother will get married first, can you lend me a little money first, help him get a lottery and let him get married, let's 'S marriage can be put on the agenda ". Ya Ting really likes Chengmin, so she is not angry. Instead, she persuades him with all her heart: "Your brother is living his own life, and you have your own life to live. I don't care how your mother arranges you and your brother. Marriage doesn’t care how many resources you can allocate to the family, but you can’t compromise anymore and spend all the money on your brother’s marriage. What should we do?”
Ting, let her take out the money first and let her younger brother get married. After the younger brother is married, the parents will not leave them alone. Ya Ting disagreed, and the two of them got into an awkward situation and ignored each other.
Chengmin took out his savings for many years and gave it to his mother, and the monthly salary was only for living expenses, and the rest was given to his younger brother. The younger brother was very happy, yelling "good brother" one by one. not long,The gift was enough, and the younger brother married his daughter-in-law gracefully.
also saw that his brother got married. Chengmin invited Ya Ting to attend the wedding and said to Ya Ting: " , don’t worry about getting married. Money, these days I get up early and make money greedily. Even if my parents don’t give us money, I can save enough money for gift money. Then, I will marry you, so beautiful ."
Ya Ting was moved by Makoto and went to the wedding together. Chengmin introduces Ya Ting to others, saying that she is her fiancée.
The sentence "sister-in-law is a mother" scares away his girlfriend.
When the two newcomers were toasting, they came to Cheng Min and Ya Ting. Cheng Jie said: " Thanks for my brother’s great help. After you enter the house, my sister-in-law, you have to take care of my younger brother. Me, my daughter-in-law, and your future nephews and nieces. I have to give you a lot of trouble. "
Cheng Min said:" what are you talking about,We are all a family, the eldest brother is like a father, and the eldest sister-in-law is like a mother. If you have any difficulties in the future, please tell me and your sister-in-law, who will help if we don't help. "Cheng Jie said a lot of things like "good brother", the two brothers are happier as they talk, but Ya Ting's face is getting more and more ugly.
span1 span 1 As soon as it was over, Ya Ting proposed to break up. She said to Cheng Min: " we are not suitable, let's end it, fortunately, we are not married yet, I don’t want to go in and spend all my energy at your house. At this time, it’s too late to exit. Let’s go back to the bridge and back to the road. From now on, let’s take a shot ".
After a long time, Cheng Min accepted the fact that the two had broken up. He wondered why his wife couldn’t accept that he had a younger brother and didn’t accept his family affection. Ya Ting communicated with him, but Ya Ting ignored him at all. Her mother knew, and said to him: " Anyway, the conditions are not very good. If you disperse, you will disperse. You will find a good condition in the future, it is best to Can dowry car, dowry room, and don’t need the beauties, so we don’t have to work so hard ".
At this time,Chengmin felt that something was wrong. He asked his mother: " you didn't say that at the beginning. You said you let your brother get married first and then take care of my marriage. Now you say this again, are you too partial?
brother Cheng Jie also said: " brother, this is not partial. Mom wants you to find me a good sister-in-law. The conditions of my sister-in-law’s house are good, and we can all benefit from it. You It’s not good to find someone with poor conditions, not to mention too many things, and to help her to subsidize her parents’ family. Of course it’s not good. You are the eldest of the family, and you must give more consideration to our big family. ”
Cheng Min is very sad, but he can only accept his fate. Whoever makes him the eldest of the family should be filial to his parents and not grab resources from his younger brother. I was educated in this way since I was a child. Although it is painful, I dare not go against the wishes of my family. He lost Ya Ting, and he didn't know where the girl who could accept him was.
The responsibility of the eldest brother and sister-in-law.
In a Chinese-style family, the eldest brother and eldest sister-in-law really have to worry more about it. In some things, it is hard to avoid being wronged. but as a younger brother,You should not accept the care of your elder brother with peace of mind, but you should share some pressure for your elder brother. The relationship between two people is called family affection.
If you blindly take care of your younger brother, but your younger brother is selfish and has benefits, the "good brother" is called affectionately. is not filial to his parents, disrespectful to his elder brother, such a brother is spoiled.
The elder brothers and sisters not only have the responsibility to care for their younger brothers and sisters, but also have the obligation to educate and control younger sisters. You can't just listen to your parents and help your younger brother blindly.
There is an old saying that "the old son, the eldest grandson, the lifeblood of the old lady". The old son is also the younger son. When a mother always feels that the younger son is not mature enough and has not grown up yet, everyone needs more help. So I will prefer to be a little bit more.
Even so, you must be measured and should not affect the lives of other children. No matter how much you love him, the more you don't let him be independent, he won't be able to grow up.
If you blindly educate your elder son, let him help his younger brother, and let him take on family responsibilities, then his outlook on life and values will be distorted, and his personality will have obvious defects. is talented,It is difficult to have a good family if you can have a relatively high achievement.
He does not know how to love his wife, nor can he give his wife a sense of security. Because in his mind, his parents and siblings are the whole and the most important family. If they cannot mediate their own perceptions and give their wives equal family status, then men cannot manage their own small family well.
Today's topic:
Do you think "Phoenix man" can marry?
Welcome to leave a message and talk about your views.
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