picture/from the Internet
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People in this life are simple and simple to say, but difficult to say, but it is actually quite difficult. For men, it is more difficult for men to take care of their families. For women, it is even more difficult. They have to take care of the family, take care of their parents, children, and husbands, as well as work to share the pressure for their husbands.
In this process, we will get lost, lose our way, and encounter all kinds of thorny problems and difficulties. If we don't pay attention, we will fall into the trap buried in life.
At this time, if someone can give us some experience, or even advice, maybe we can avoid some detours.
Especially for people who have been married, if you can get a few pieces of advice from the incoming population, the probability of a happy married life may be a little bit higher. So, where can the advice come from?
If you don't have a good way right now, you might as well listen to some advice I got from Mr. Jia Pingwa " Travel Alone ".
When you open the book "Walk Alone", you will find that there are actually many life philosophies hidden in this book, which are very applicable to married people.
Next, let me share with you 3 tips that will make married people use for life.
Jia Pingwa: The more intense the person who wants to cultivate children, the more mediocre this person is.
This sentence appears in the second chapter of the book "Living Alone" in the second chapter of the silently watching the world" Speaking of children" in this article.
said in the original text: "If you come into contact with more adults like this, you will find that the more intense a person who wants to cultivate children, the more mediocre this person lives. He lives without self-confidence. If you are, you will place your hopes on your children. This behavior should be selfish and cruel, passing on disaster."
deeply agrees.After many married people have children, their first priority or the first thing in their minds is to nurture the children, imposing the unfulfilled wishes and the things they have not done on the children.
For the children's learning, even if you risk being pissed off, you have to tutor them with homework. Even the husband and wife quarreled, and the marriage life was all over the place.
In order for children to be versatile, no matter how painful and tired, they must also work hard to make money and send them to various interest classes and study classes.
In order for children to succeed, they are forced to study hard at all costs. Some parents even interfere with their children's professional choices, not letting children choose which ones they can make according to their own interests but who can make money in the future.
These almost crazy behaviors of parents are obviously for their children, but in fact they are for their own vanity. Because they are mediocre and lack self-confidence, they pass all their hopes to their children.
It is precisely these behaviors that cause some children to get tired of school prematurely, and even worse, they suffer from depression. These parents' behaviors, as Mr. Jia Pingwa said, are selfish, cruel, and pass on disasters.
Actually, in Mr. Jia Pingwa's opinion, if everyone in this world is Margaret Thatcher and everyone is an artist, then this world is really terrible!
Therefore, Mr. Jia Pingwa mentioned: "The lives of children belong to children. You don’t have to worry about nothing without your design. On the contrary, life cannot bear too much light and weight. It taught him the basic morals and morals of life. The spirit of struggle, there are regular schools to teach knowledge and skills, and more social colleges to teach life experience, every life will naturally emit its own brilliant light."
Jia Pingwa: Be a wife Always get the husband’s favor
said in the original text: "A smart woman wants to be valued by men forever,To be a wife, she must always be favored by her husband. What she should pursue is not to allow men to possess, nor to possess men, but to transform into a kind of self-independence. "
In marriage, especially for women, once they enter the role of "mother", it is like being enchanted, and they are filled with children.
Therefore, most married women will The mother-daughter relationship is the first priority and the husband and wife relationship is ignored. The consequences of this will cause women to give up their appearance, career and even interaction with their husbands in order to take care of their children. In addition to becoming more and more sloppy, the relationship between husband and wife will become more and more dull. In the long run, how can married life be happy?
Actually, married life should come first. Just like Mr. Jia Pingwa said, smart women will always be smart To be valued by a man, and to be a wife, you must always be favored by the husband.
Only when the husband's favor is obtained, and the relationship between husband and wife is getting better and better, can the family be stable as a rock, and the children can have a healthy and happy family and grow up strong. , This is really good for the children and for the family.
Jia Pingwa: If you live without getting sick, you will be poor and deficient.
This sentence appears in the book "Free and Alone" The second chapter silently looks at the world in the chapter "Talking about being sick" in the prose.
The original text says: " Xishi is so beautiful, Lin sister is so good, all sickness gave birth Realm, if you live without getting sick, you are so poor and deficient.
I was very puzzled when I first read. Why do people get sick, and why do people feel poor and deficient if they are not sick? Isn't it good for people not to get sick in their entire life and not to go to the hospital?
But after reading, you will find that people eat Whole grains, how can anyone not get sick? What Mr. Jia Pingwa said,In fact, it is a state of "blindness".
What do you say? Around us, many families are separated, how many are "sick"?
A long time ago, I read a story. My wife was ill and couldn't be cured for any amount of money, but she was eager to live and wanted to be cured for any amount of money.
But her husband thinks that since it can't be cured, why bother to end up with personal finances? Isn't it bad to leave the money to the children? The husband and wife couldn't think of going together, and in desperation they had to divorce.
In fact, it is common to get sick. Minor illnesses don't need trouble, and serious illnesses don't need pain. But being ill will test whether the couple can help each other in the same boat.
When facing this kind of disease that is doomed for a long time, if you have a family, you should really look down on it. After all, people have to go that way. In our whole life, we should focus on the quality of life, not the length of life.
In the limited time, let yourself live better, more comfortable, and less regrettable. Wouldn't it be better? Why bother to find a point of meaningless life?
"The stronger the person who wants to cultivate children, the more mediocre this person" "Wife will always be favored by her husband" "If you live without getting sick, how poor and deficient", Mr. Jia Pingwa is in The three sentences written in the book "Traveling Alone" talked about the cultivation of the next generation, how to get along with husband and wife, and how husband and wife deal with birth, aging, sickness and death. These 3 advices can be used for life, each of them is very good. Practical, I hope you know all of you who have been married.
And when I was married, when I saw these three passages in Mr. Jia Pingwa's book "Walk Alone", my mood instantly opened. Can't help but admire, Mr. is really worthy of being one of the few literary masters in contemporary Chinese literary circles.
This extremely rebellious writer is a wise man in the world, but also a deep lone traveler.
This book "Walk Alone" published in 2016,The purpose is to write to the travellers of life, I hope they can understand the true meaning of loneliness, and be more calm in life. After its release, it has also become a beacon for countless readers in their lives.
I highly recommend this book "Walk Alone". Every article in the book contains the wisdom of Mr. Jia Pingwa.
Whether you are married or not, you can actually buy it and have a look. There is always a sentence that can come into your heart and let you have a sense of marriage and life.
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