When I was young, I heard the most words from my parents: "You are not obedient, don't blame me for beating you"! didn't expect that when he grew up, he would finally become the "most annoying" appearance at the time, and would always talk harshly to children like this. "obedient" seems to be the best adjective for a good child. . When you meet a child who is obedient, it is so good for parents to care about and worry about learning!
Until I heard an interview with American billionaire Rui Dalio , he talked about his views on family education. The summary is written in one sentence: raises a child and wants him to be "obedient"! Whether it is family education or school education, if children are blindly required to be obedient and follow the regulations, then when they grow up, they will raise a person who follows the established regulations and lack creativity. Children like
may be admitted to a good university , which can meet the parents' requirements for them to go to, but boring . They will encounter a huge challenge, lacks the ability to think independently, and sometimes do not even know what they want! If a person doesn't even know what he wants, then what is the meaning of life?
billionaire Rui Dalio has 4 sons, 2 of whom are engaged in art work and 2 of them are in business. They are all outstanding. Holi Dalio disdain to train children into obedient people. He pays great attention to the cultivation of children's independent thinking. When children are young, if they have good reasons, they can do according to their own ideas, even if they are. If you have a lesson you don’t like to learn, as long as you find a strong reason to persuade him!
Rui Dalio’s words gave me a lot of reflection, which reminds me of the popular TV series "In the Name of Family" some time ago. There is a good girl character Qi Mingyue , which is " Synonymous with "obedient". Because of a strong mother, Qi Mingyue didn't have the opportunity to make a decision since she was a child. Z1z couldn't even order food after she grew up. It's not an exaggeration to think about plots like
. How many people like to say: " whatever" and "anything" is actually a manifestation of the lack of independent thinking ability. Ordering food is just a small matter. When our company recruited, there were even children who brought their mothers to interview! This is not a joke, but a real thing. If parents still do not pay attention to the cultivation of children's independent thinking, then your children may become a joke in the future.
German philosopher Schopenhauer: The truths taught to us by others are only the prosthetic limbs and dentures attached to us, and the truths obtained through thinking are our natural limbs and real teeth. Only these things truly belong to us. How does
cultivate children's ability to think independently?
1. Use dialogue to guide children to think about
If you don’t think about it, you won’t be able to learn. ——Confucius
After the age of 3, children will enter a sensitive period of curiosity and become "why walking". Parents should seize this stage, protect their children's thirst for knowledge, and let children think proactively through guidance. Use sentences like what is, why, how to do it, and what do you think use to talk to your children and make thinking a habit.
2, let the child do things independently
children initially have behaviors before . Want to cultivate independent thinking, fundamentally let children do things independently. Parents give children more space and more freedom. In the process of completing tasks independently, children will form their own way of thinking and be self-conscious. the host.
For example, let children do their homework independently, listen carefully in class, and do not need to be urged by others. These independent behaviors are actually the basis for independent thinking. When my child was 4 years old, I started to show him "The Fairy Tale of Crooked Rabbit's Independent Growing Up and Learn to Take Care of Yourself" , which is very helpful to the child. Parents who are interested can show it to them!
3, improve children's self-esteem level
the higher the level of self-esteem, the higher the self-control ability. ——Fan Deng
Children with high self-esteem are very self-disciplined, and self-disciplined children naturally have independent thoughts. These factors are mutually reinforcing. However, many parents do not pay attention to their children's self-esteem. There are not a few parents who criticize their children in front of others, and they will take it for granted. As a result, children may have thick-skinned, overly concerned about the opinions of others, and afraid to express themselves .
psychologist studies have shown that children’s self-emotional transition age occurs at 4 years old , and they feel embarrassed. In fact, it is the bud of self-esteem, and self-esteem is an important part of the personality self-regulation psychology , if self-esteem is too strong, children may become vain, if self-esteem is too weak, they may be inferior. It can be seen from that parents cannot ignore the cultivation of self-esteem.
