Bing Xin Mr. Bing Xin wrote this passage in her article "No Why":
Once, when I was young, I suddenly walked to my mother and asked with my face upright: "Mom, why do you love me?"
Mother put down the needle and thread, pressed her cheek against my forehead, and said gently and without hesitation: "No Why--just because you are my daughter!"
Mr. Bing Xin said that the mother's love is so firm, without whirlwind, without any reasons or conditions. Just because you are my child, I have no distractions and love you incredibly simple ways.
Parents’ love can wrap the hearts of children, accompany the children through the long seasons and the ends of the world, Mr. Bing Xin even said, “This is how the world is built!”
A forest Family education ’s “Five senses and five powers” theoretical system proposes that parents’ love is the best “sense of security” for children. Through the acquisition and establishment of a "sense of security", children's "understanding", that is, the ability to think from the perspective of others, understand themselves and accept others.
Under the guidance of "understanding", children can form an open and inclusive mindset, become brave and strong, and avoid negative emotions such as depression and anxiety.
A forest 1×10 Forest Work Method proposes that in family education, using reasonable and positive language to express love to children is an important way for children to gain a sense of security.
Specifically, a forest teenager psychological expert proposed that in cultivating children's sense of security and understanding:
1. Expressing love and encouragement for children in straightforward language
Many parents think it is a bit too stingy to say "love" to their children directly. Try to be as reserved when encouraging and praising, for fear that the child will be proud as soon as he praises him.
In the eyes of parents, love is expressed in a silent way, but for children, they may think that their parents do not love themselves enough, or that they do not deserve the love of their parents.
In fact, love also needs to be proved, otherwise the love parents may not understand.
2. Express your love for your child by using close behaviors
Parents’ hugs, good night kisses, and touching the top of their heads are good ways to convey love, which can make children feel the intimacy between themselves and their parents and create a sense of happiness and security.
3. Pay attention to the sense of ceremony
Children's birthday, admission ceremony, graduation ceremony, and other important things to children, parents should show enough attention. For example, give gifts that your child loves, write small cards for your child, etc. Parents’ careful care is the best surprise to their children.
A forest teenager psychology expert said that love is hidden in the little things of life. The sadness of children's forgetting and breach of trust in their parents, the more touched they pay attention and care for their parents.
4. Accompany more
The feeling of children is very direct. Parents often stay with them, so they think that their parents love themselves. If your parents talk less, you will doubt your parents’ love if you spend less time with them.
How to soothe children’s sensitive heart?
Spend time to accompany him more, even if you just sit together quietly and talk about some trivialities in life, children can feel their parents' care and love in their gentle eyes and relaxed tone.
A forest teenager psychology experts believe that accepting love and expressing love is a beautiful lesson that parents should teach their children.
Love for children needs to be expressed directly and positively, so that children can experience the power of warmth, gain confidence and security, and find a sense of belonging to the family. Then he will treat others with the same love and tenderness.
