Educating children is a compulsory course for every parent.
As parents, they all want their children to grow up well and have a good personality. However, the effectiveness of some parents in educating their children is not as expected, and instead becomes worse and worse. Every parent loves their children. The starting point is right, but their behavior may not be correct. Instead, it will bring huge pressure and even psychological shadows to their children.
In fact, there is no absolute way to raise a child, but some misunderstandings must be known. Because the wrong way of education will ruin a child's life.
6 wrong educational methods
1. Criticizing children in public
Criticizing children in public is a scene we often see. If someone praises children, some parents will say, "What's the good thing about this child? I just talk back every day and don't do well in the exam, which always makes me worry."
However, if parents can affirm their children in public, what they gain is a full sense of happiness and security.
"Yes, my child works very hard and has indeed made great progress. It's great!" This kind of public thing will definitely be very powerful.
2. Family conflicts
Children who grow up in an unhappy family environment are often lacking love and are prone to develop sensitive and inferior personality. If parents are loving, the child will have a stable sense of security and belonging, and will have a more optimistic and confident personality.
3. Don’t trust
A child helps his mother carry the plate. The mother immediately said, "You can’t handle it properly, and you will beat the plate."
A child takes a broom to sweep the floor. The father immediately said, "Don’t sweep, you can’t sweep it clean." ...
The reason why parents say this is distrust, thinking that the child is young and does not believe that the child can do things well, but over time, the child will be hit and may be unwilling to accept new things and develop an escaped character.
often parents disagree with some things and think they are trivial matters, but some pain will remain deep in the hearts of their children and accompany them throughout their lives.
4. Ignore
Some parents do not listen to their children, or ignore them when their children speak, which can easily make the children think it is a normal behavior. Over time, it will damage the children's self-esteem, or make the children develop a personality that ignores the feelings of others.
5. Excessive punishment
"Filial son comes from under the stick" is an extreme educational method. Some parents stubbornly believe that corporal punishment can correct their children's bad habits, but this cannot change their children's behavior. The child must have his reasons for doing this. If parents do not understand the reasons, they will make a simple judgment. The child will not be convinced, but he is just depressed by strong pressure. Moreover, some excessive behaviors will also leave a shadow on the child’s heart.
6. Reprimand and belittling
The casual scolding and belittling of parents can easily suppress their children's confidence. In order to prevent their children from being proud, some parents choose to "motivate" their children in a belittling way, such as "Everyone else can do it, why can't you?" Although the child is already working hard and satisfied, he must also say, "You are not doing well enough, not as good as others." This disguised motivation will make the child unable to bear it, feel heartbroken or even collapse.
The correct way for parents to educate their children
1. Always let children see hope
praise children loudly and encourage them sincerely will make children grow faster and will make children dare to challenge more difficult tasks.
For example, "If you do a good job in the exam, you will gain something when you work hard. Keep working hard!"
Children who grow up in an environment of encouragement and praise will be more confident and brave.
2. Care for children
The child's body is more important than learning. In the process of pursuing grades, you should also care about the child's sleep and body, because the carrier of happiness is a healthy body. Drinking more glass of milk is more important than doing more exercises.
3. Accept imperfections of children
Don’t be demanding on children. Neither people nor children are perfect, imperfection is the norm.
If you have to use strict standards to require your child, then the child will be very tired, the parents will be very tired, and the parent-child relationship will also have problems.
4. Listen to the voice of children
Real communication is to understand and empathize with . Only when children feel respect and acceptance will they open their hearts to their parents.
For example, an answer I saw on the Internet.
Children's enthusiasm for conversation is often gradually eliminated by parents' ignorance and indifference, which is why many children are unwilling to communicate with their parents.
Parents treat their children with an equal attitude and listen to their voices so that they will express their true thoughts. If adults do not value their thoughts and voices, over time, children will become timid and unwilling to communicate with their parents.
In short, educating children must start from the details. Adults must be patient, pay attention to the tone of speaking and communication methods, otherwise they will do bad things with good intentions and quarrel with their children.
What are your experiences in educating your children? Welcome to share with you in the comment section!
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