The most beautiful person in the family is you. Round face, bright eyes, big ears, plump earlobes. God has given you the beauty as brilliant as stars. I don’t know who it is, and he also gave you a poetic name, Wang Xuefen.
You speak very nicely, don’t talk much, don’t speak loudly, sweet and clear as a mountain spring. Since I became sensible, I really like to look into your eyes and listen to you. Since I grew up and grew older, I have been listening to it for more than 50 years. There is a cousin who looks very similar to you and is also very beautiful. Maybe his voice is a bit hoarse, and he has a distance from his closeness to her.
You value friendship very much. A group of children who have been studying and having fun together as children have been together for decades. The grandchildren are older than you back then, but you are moving very frequently. I have had occasional contact with your classmates since I can remember. You are together to recall the past, talk about your children, talk about your recent experiences, and never avoid me. In your mind, I am your son.
You have worked in many township health centers in the county. Every time you go to a place, you have met close friends with deep friendships. You have been in contact for decades. When I was still studying, you took me to my best friend's house. After getting married, I took my husband and wife to go there, and there were many places and many families. I also want to help you receive your best friend at your house.
You treat your classmates and best friends as relatives. If you haven’t seen each other for a while, you always have to find a way to contact us, chat a few words, and ask about your current situation before you can feel at ease. They also think that you are a relative and encounter major changes in your family and life. In recent years, they have been hospitalized until they die. Your classmates and best friends are there. I will accompany you and comfort you; when you leave, they are all here, and I will send you on the journey of return to life.
Your financial situation has always been bad and your salary has always been very low. This is also the common feature of people of your era. You rarely buy new clothes. When you were young, you went back to your parents' home. After several years, you often only had two pieces of changing clothes. You are very saving in your life. Sometimes there are only a few leftover dishes or slices of them for each meal. You are never willing to pour them out. You always pick them up one by one, change them to a small plate, sort them and put them in cupboard .
One summer vacation, I was also a fourth or fifth grade student in elementary school. My uncle, who was about 10 years older than me, took me over mountains and ridges for dozens of kilometers and came to Yanhe Health Center. You are very happy that your nephew has come, that is, your child has come home. The hospital housing was very tight. You took your cousin and three of you to squeeze into a house less than ten square meters. It became a problem for us to sleep, not to mention that the uncle is a young man who is nearly 20 years old. I can no longer remember whether I was sleeping on the pharmacy floor or on the operating room operating bed.
Because we are not much different from our younger brother and younger sister, we have fun together every day. My uncle is also happy because he doesn’t need to do farm work. I stayed for more than a month without realizing it, and this has made you suffer. At this time, the couple had divorced due to long-term tensions in their relationship, and each of the two children was responsible for one. The holidays are coming, and the three of them are added to the meal. Besides, the uncle is a young man, and he is very good at eating. I don’t know how you survived this month. Several years later, you have inadvertently talked about this time, borrowing rice and money everywhere; trying to get food coupons; and asking for pickled vegetables at farmers' homes. At that time, an aunt at the township radio station and an older sister at the school gave you food coupons. This sister later became my colleague and died young due to sudden cardiac death. I once wrote a memorial article for her death.
Life is difficult, but every time you go back to your parents' home, you either buy some meat or red ginseng , and you also have to buy a few fruit candies for my brothers and sisters. In an era when you have to spend a penny in half, I don’t know how self-discipline and saving you can do it. After your father-in-law passed away, you never left empty-handed every time you went to your parents' home to see your brother and sister-in-law. This seems to have become your habit.
You have a tragic fate. When you were only fifteen or sixteen years old, you met your first husband. At that time, a clerk from the county health bureau, a foreigner, and he is said to have a high IQ. Your beauty and simplicity attracted him, and it was your simplicity that soon brought you two into the palace of marriage.Perhaps, this is what traditional concepts say is that the handsome man and beautiful woman are good. If you are not sure it is suitable. He cares about his young and beautiful bride very much, but his concern is not manifested in caring, loving, or trying to give you a warm, sweet and romantic home, but limiting and even monitoring you everywhere. He is stingy and restricts his family from spending money everywhere, even necessary living expenses. Hidden money in the cracks of the wall and in firewood, and hide everything he can think of, others can't find, and he will forget it after a long time. He is not confident, and as long as you talk to the man, he will become suspicious. He followed you to Qianjin Township, one of the most remote towns in the county at that time. I don’t know whether it was for love, or for the beautiful wife, or for other reasons. All I know is that his wife, who was less than twenty years old, gave birth to a daughter for him and another son, who was less than twenty-five years old at that time.
You two work in two neighboring township health centers, and he often runs back in the middle of the night. Is it because my wife worked hard with her two children and came back to help take care of the children, or is there something wrong with her trust in her? The couple often quarreled in the middle of the night, or even beaten, scaring the eldest daughter who was a little sensible just now, and trembled. Could this be the early trigger for her heart disease? Until today, I am not sure and do not want to deny it. The noise made two pairs of ignorant eyes look at the world without flowers, harmony, and sweetness. What was left was endless family wars. No one can survive such a life. In the years of beauty, under the eyes of two pairs of eyes longing for fatherly love and motherly love, you are separated.
I took my child with me and changed into a health center, and I spent a few years peacefully. Although it is hard, it is less harmful to the soul. At about 30 years old, a friend introduced you to a soldier whose wife died of illness, and also brought two children to join them. Their children are too young and so pitiful. Early on, one party lacks fatherly love and the other party lacks maternal love. Perhaps living conditions are better, and your union will make up for the shortcomings. However, you have not been able to get out of the incomplete shadows, and your preference for your respective children makes the contradictions difficult to reconcile. There was no argument or argument, and they broke up again quietly.
At this time, the eldest daughter's heart problem occurred, and it occurred in the early 1970s when the national medical level was not high, the medical insurance had not been implemented, and the citizens' economic income was extremely low. You are watching your daughter's illness get worse day by day, but what else can you do besides accompanying and comforting her and getting some simple medicine to relieve her condition? Every time I see my daughter lying on the bed at home, her eyes closed, her face was pale, her breathing was rapid, and her life was hanging on the line, she could only cry. You are a medical staff member, working in the hospital, watching your flesh and blood lie in front of you, struggling on the brink of death again and again, words such as heartbreak and pain, can you explain your state of mind at this moment? Year after year, day after day, you have suffered for more than ten years. When your daughter's deadline finally comes, your tears have dried up and your heart is numb. Just staring at your daughter's body in a daze, your soul must be with your daughter, and you are also step by step towards Naihe Bridge ...
Fortunately, my beloved son was admitted to university and gave you new hope. Maybe it is the best place? The gods who dominate fate in the dark sympathize with your experience, allowing you to meet a respected person who accompanied your life to the end, my most respected old principal, a good man who has lost his wife for many years, you have gone through the most difficult time together.
Happy time is everyone's highest yearning, and it is always accompanied by many people, allowing laughter and joy to cover every footprint of life. I don’t know why, fate is always extremely mean to you. When the smile only showed the corners of your mouth, another unbearable blow came to you again. Everything is so sudden and so heavy, how can your thin shoulders bear it? How to accept the heart with a lot of holes? Fortunately, my son-in-law is with you to face it and deal with it together. Turn despair into disappointment, turn disappointment into hope, turn hope into joy. You spent another dark time with the strength that ordinary people could not imagine.
You attach great importance to family affection.When my aunt and eldest son-in-law were sick, they accompanied him to the hospital for examination, purchase medicine, and treatment. If the money was not enough, they secretly made up for it. No matter how financially you are, you will try every means to create conditions for your elder sister and brother-in-law to treat your illness.
The second aunt died early, they gave birth to many children, and the second aunt had no job. Although they live in provincial cities, the difficulties are especially difficult for farmers who dig food in the land. You are always thinking about this miserable sister. The same difficult financial situation makes you unable to help you as much as possible and often express guilt in front of me. In fact, you still tried your best, although you couldn't do it.
I first arrived at the Education Bureau. Yuexi is one of the last three counties in the province that have not passed the " General Jiu " acceptance. As a staff member who has experienced this most important event in the history of Yuexi education, it is inevitable and honorable to be busy. The children are young and the lovers are busy. Our family of three often eats with you. I ate too much and the pot at home was rusted.
The ancients said that kindness can bring good luck, and it can always be fulfilled by others, but it is always inconsistent with you. I have suffered three car accidents in my life, which will make you die every time. Once, I invited your family and your sister to get together. You want to come to my house in advance and get a large truck down and get injured in many parts of your body. The beautiful ears were torn apart, leaving scars that could not heal for life.
You have tenacity beyond ordinary people. Marriage and children’s misfortunes make you live in pain often, and it is common for you to be unable to sleep at night. Even steel can be exhausted, let alone people. I was only in my forties, and when I was young and strong, many chronic diseases came to you, and I have been with the medicine until the end of my life. Diabetes is one of your many chronic diseases. Although it will not directly lead to death, most of the complications caused by it are fatal stubborn diseases. What's more, some complications make life worse than death, and you will encounter it.
Two years ago, your oral ulcer made dysphagia , and after treatment, oral bleeding symptoms appeared. I was afraid of causing trouble for my son, so I kept it myself and didn't tell him. I felt that your situation was wrong, so I told my cousin and helped contact the provincial hospital experts. The mother and son are in love, and my cousin dare not slackew at all. I will drive you to Hefei immediately. As soon as I entered the hospital gate, I had severe oral bleeding and I entered the operating room without anyone going through the procedures. After timely surgery by experts, the wound was sutured and stopped bleeding, but decades of diabetes have prevented the wound from fully healing.
Your oral problem is not a simple ulcer, but a cancer. My cousin hides you from it and forged a medical record in order to give you more confidence to overcome the disease. I have concealed it from you and all my relatives. It was not until this year that your condition worsened and your chewing function lost. I could only drink porridge and soup, and I didn’t dare to speak loudly. My cousin told me. Since the middle of last year, it has become increasingly difficult for you to eat, the movement of your mouth is a little more intense, pulling the wound that has not been completely healed, and it is painful like tearing. I can’t drink porridge and I can’t drink ordinary soup. On your last birthday, you said that you smell the tempting fragrance of rice and want to eat half a bowl!
I bought you poultry and aquatic products such as pigeons, chickens, ducks, fish and eels. After cooking soup once, I will no longer drink it; I drink more clear soup from pork ribs, and I can’t drink it after early spring this year. It is said that the oil and water are heavy, and my body cannot bear it after drinking it; in the last few months of your life, you can only drink some leg bone soup. As the elderly grow older, calcium loss is a normal physiological phenomenon. Diabetes not only causes calcium loss, but the key is severe osteoporosis, which makes you unable to move. Very ordinary falls, causing a serious fracture every time, and the heaviest one left you in bed for several months.
The spreading cancer cells erode many of your organs, causing chest tightness to cause breathlessness, which is a heart problem. In desperation, you took the initiative to ask to be hospitalized in the Chinese Medicine Hospital for the first time. When the condition is slightly stable, I am eager to go home. Within a few days after returning home, the irregular heartbeat made you breathless again. You must understand that the condition has worsened, and although it is uncomfortable, you can't persist in hospital. My cousin and I worked repeatedly and sent you to county hospital . After that, the soup was soaked and the water was soaked that it could only rely on a little nutrient solution to maintain life.When relatives and friends visit you, they can only signal through their eyes, and even the power to speak is lost. Looking at the body that completely removed its original form, we felt deeply saddened.
You know that it is not far from the deadline, so you insist on not hanging water and want to go home; my cousin asked me for my advice and asked you to go home. A few days after returning home, your grandson and we took turns dipping a cotton swab with some water to moisten your lips and quietly wait for the last moment to arrive. My sad and inexplicable cousin, shed tears, lying in your ears, persuading my mother to give up and go to meet with my sister in another world earlier...
On the morning of July 27, the sun hovered over our heads on time. I wonder if it was coming to pick you up, but you followed her. Although my cousin persuades you that "this world is not worth nostalgic", in fact, you will never let go of many people and things in this world. Leaving is always helpless and is also an inevitable destination. I hope you and your daughter Xiaoli will meet again in another world, worry-free and happy!
