10 years ago, he accidentally participated in the psychology training class hosted by Jiangsu Provincial Institute of Education and Science and Professors from South Normal University, and taught by Professors such as Fu Hong and Deng Zhu, and began to help others with great enthusiasm.
The first case I received was contacted through qq (it seemed that there was no WeChat at that time), so it was considered an online consultation. The client is a young man in his 20s studying in a university in Nanjing. Before the exam at the end of the year, I have poor sleep and anxiety during the day. I always feel that something bad is going to happen.
At that time, I didn’t know anything about listening or empathizing with , but just companionship and comfort. Throughout the winter vacation, communication was almost every day. After he returned home, he faced the loneliness of his elderly parents, and because of his introvert and no friends, he accidentally found out that his despair of liver hemangioma was flooded towards me like a tide. And I accepted it completely unconditionally (a consultation fee is confiscated). After the New Year's start, I suggested that he find the school's psychological counseling room to help, and he accepted it happily, and I felt relieved.
Afterwards, I reflected: Helping others is so heavy and almost painful. Is this what I need? However, knowing the client’s pain, can I watch the coldly! In the following theoretical study and practice, I knew that the experience was called reverse transfer, and it was the client's painful emotion that aroused the same emotions in my early years (the client had two sisters, facing the loneliness and helplessness of his elderly parents). I am very pleased that after that experience, after handling the case, I can jump out of the situation. This is probably the reverse transfer experience that made me feel immune.
Psychological consultation brings me pain and happiness! I calm down and think about my inner motivation for being so devoted to psychological counseling. Sussman summarized more than a dozen of them in his book "The Motivation of Psychotherapists". I think my motivation is to rescue fantasy and make up for needs. In my early memory, my mother was suffering from chronic illness for a long time and the guilt that she had caused by her own blame for being unable to help her at a young age has been surround me, causing the feeling of saving my mother, saving the world, and making up for the guilt in my heart. To put it bluntly, it is God's feelings. After understanding these, you will be more determined to continue on the path of psychological help, without any regrets!
