text/Ye Feifei yff
pictures/from the Internet
I am Ye Feifei yff, a non-famous emotional mentor. I write heartfelt emotional words. I hope that using warm words can bring you some spiritual comfort.
Some people say: "The higher the quality of leftover women, the harder it is to find a partner."
Indeed, if you observe carefully, you will find that there are many high-quality leftover women who are almost difficult to marry.
The reason is very simple. They think they have excellent conditions, such as high education, good economic foundation, good looks, strong ability, rich experience, etc.
In their opinion, they have such good conditions and it is not difficult to find a high-quality man, so they generally set very high standards for choosing a spouse.
However, they overlooked one thing: these excellent conditions of leftover women are basically worthless in the eyes of men.
What do men care about most? It's very simple. They want to find a young and beautiful girl with good fertility conditions, but this is the shortcoming of leftover women.
It can be seen that it is not realistic for leftover women to blindly raise the conditions for choosing a mate. On the contrary, it will make them lose more opportunities and make it difficult to leave the single.
However, in reality, many older leftover women do not realize this and still go their own way. In the end, they are ridiculed by men and live a very aggrieved life.
This is the case for my colleague Ms. Hu. She is 35 years old, has graduated from graduate school, has a decent job, and a monthly salary of 30,000 yuan. She lives a very refined life.
Therefore, she has always adhered to her own criteria for choosing a spouse, and she needs to find a truly high-quality man who is a good match for her.
Because of this mentality, she always puts forward four requirements to men during blind dates:
The man's monthly salary must reach 30,000 , a fully paid house and car, financial separation after marriage, not accepting premarital examination and not living with his parents-in-law.
Ms. Hu said that her own financial foundation is good, and a man must match him; a house and a car after marriage are necessary living conditions; As for premarital examination, she feels that now is an open era, and men's concepts cannot be outdated.
In the end, she refused to live with her parents-in-law because she wanted to be independent after marriage to avoid conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
However, such high standards were hardly recognized by men. As a result, she had been on a blind date for three years, but no one cared about her, and she was even ridiculed by men.
For example, once, she went on a blind date with a man with good conditions. The man was 33 years old, and his education and financial conditions were similar to hers. The two met and chatted very well.
However, when the two parties got to know each other deeply, they had differences about their future life, and it soon became unpleasant.
At that time, when Ms. Hu talked about the issue of marriage, she stated her four requirements. She originally thought that the man would understand her, but the result was just the opposite.
After hearing this, the man felt a little unhappy, and then asked her: "Put aside the financial conditions for now. What I am more concerned about is why you refused to have a premarital examination and did not live with your parents-in-law."
Miss Hu also patiently explained to him, but the man did not agree and found it difficult to accept this condition, which made Sister Hu very angry.
So, Miss Hu said directly: "You can't accept it. I can't make do with it. When a woman gets married, she doesn't just find a man to take care of her."
The man said: "Who asked you to take care of me? Do your parents just ignore you after you get married? You are too selfish."
Hu Xiao After hearing this, my sister became angry instantly. She said, "How could I be selfish? You obviously want to marry for free and find a woman to be a nanny. You deserve to be single."
In this way, the two people were tit for tat, and neither one was willing to give in, making the blind date very embarrassing.
In the end, Ms. Hu was so angry that she got up and wanted to leave. She also said to the man: "Men like you should stop looking for wives. Don't harm women."
After hearing this, the man may have been angry, so he asked her: "You have so many demands. "Please, if the standard is so high and you don't have a premarital examination, are you still intact? Can you still have children?"
Ms. Hu was really aggrieved and was so angry at being ridiculed and scolded by him for no reason that she couldn't help but slap him and left quickly.
After returning home, Ms. Hu felt particularly aggrieved. She felt that the man on the blind date really did not respect women and she had lost confidence in the blind date.
Nowadays, Ms. Hu rarely goes on blind dates. She said that it is better to wait for fate, because she really does not want to make do with it. If a man cannot meet the conditions, it is impossible to get married.
In reality, there may be many high-quality leftover women like Miss Hu, and they have always wanted to find a high-quality man.
However, their requirements for mate selection are too high for men to accept. After all, when a man gets married, he does not mean to break away from his original family, but to build a happy family on the basis of the original.
Furthermore, men care most about women’s age and fertility. If women do not have better conditions in this regard, it will almost be denied.
It is an indisputable fact that some leftover women have an improper mentality when choosing a mate and fail to recognize the reality, which also leads to their delay in finding a suitable partner.
In the eyes of men, if a woman is not married after the age of 30, no matter how good she is, she will not be the first choice .
If a woman makes a lot of demands, or even the demands are too unreasonable, it will only disgust the man, making him even less likely to marry her.
Therefore, older leftover women should recognize the reality early and not be biased towards divorce and love, so as not to delay themselves.
Ye Feifei yff's emotional message:
In summary, although high-quality leftover women have a certain vision and good economic conditions, there is nothing wrong with wanting to find a high-quality partner.
However, your request cannot deviate from reality, otherwise it will only make men more repulsive and disgusted.
Furthermore, women really can't afford it. If they insist on incorrect requirements for mate selection, they will only miss more opportunities.
Because a truly high-quality man will definitely not look at a woman’s conditions, but care about her reproductive value. The more conditions you have, the easier it will be for him to despise you.
I hope that older leftover women will not insist on having their own way. If you are willing to lower your profile sometimes, you may meet a good match soon and let you leave your single life as soon as possible.
Therefore, when you meet a relatively compatible partner, it is recommended that older leftover women give each other a chance and stop blindly consuming them.
Perhaps, happiness is not far away, it is just in your thoughts, do you understand?
END
Author: Ye Feifei yff, focusing on creation and sharing in the emotional field, using emotions to communicate between our hearts. I hope you and I can get to know each other here. If you like it, please follow me.
