--- Text/Hui Ge talks about emotions
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Preface: In life, we can't help but make up some lies for a certain purpose, and we always naively believe that as long as this lie is kind-hearted, even if it is known to the other party in the future, we can make a "not guilty defense" for ourselves.
However, no matter what the starting point is, a lie is a lie. Even if it is covered with beautiful cloak, it is a kind of deception to others. Therefore, once the lie is exposed, the other party will definitely feel angry and sad.
Moreover, there is a saying: "The world of emotions cannot accommodate a grain of sand." The beauty of love lies in the absence of any impurities inside, it lies in the cleanliness and transparency. If a grain of sand is mixed in it, the light of love will be blocked by this grain of sand, making love dim and dull.
In fact, love is very simple, it means treating two people sincerely and sincerely. The difference between good love and bad love is that good love is frank and innocent, while bad love is full of deception and calculation.
Therefore, whether a relationship or marriage can be happy depends on whether two people can treat each other sincerely.
Recently, the author saw a female blogger born in the 1970s telling her emotional experience, and lamenting that the marriage obtained by her deception ended in a breakdown. The lessons are worth learning from.
html Post-870 woman tells her emotional experience
Xiaoya tells herself that she was born in 1970 and is over 50 years old. She is currently living alone in a farm, working as a self-media and planting flowers and plants to make a living. Her life is simple and happy.
Xiaoya said that she was rebellious when she was a child. She dropped out of school after going to junior high school. She then went to work in various places and learned typing, marketing, education and training. Because she studied hard and worked hard, she was highly appreciated by her boss and did several tasks well. However, in the end, because she had no diploma, she had to leave the education and training industry and choose to live in seclusion in the mountains.
talked about her emotional experience, Xiao Ya was also full of melancholy, saying that because of her deception, her lover left her angrily, and also put her life in a trough.
Xiaoya said that she entered her first marriage at a ignorant age and gave birth to a son and a daughter first. Later, because of her disagreement, she quarreled with her ex-husband every day, and the two finally chose to part ways.
When divorced, the ex-husband took his daughter away, and she lived with her son.
Since then, Xiaoya has devoted her energy to work and entrepreneurship, getting up early and going to work late every day, hoping to create a bright future for her son through her own efforts. During
, she met some singles through friend introductions and work relationships, and some people even expressed their affection for her. But when the other party was alone with a son, they all started to give in, or simply left the following.
When my son grew up and learned about his hard work and difficulty, he said to his mother: "Mom, I hope you can live a happy and happy life. If you go on a blind date with others in the future, you will say that I am your nephew."
Xiao Ya saw her son so sensible, and hugged her son tightly, with tears in her eyes.
Later, Xiaoya selfishly accepted her son's suggestion. When she met her second husband, she deceived him, told him that his son was her nephew, and said that her age was 76 years old. In this way, she entered the second marriage smoothly.
Xiao Ya cherishes this hard-won marriage and is very kind to her husband. Not only do she change her ways to make delicious food for him every day, she also starts a business outside alone, so she doesn't let him work hard and help.
Xiao Ya said that she did this because she felt a strong sense of guilt in her heart and always felt that she had deceived him, so she had to make up for it by treating him well.
During the marriage, no matter what happens, Xiao Ya will accommodate him, tolerate him, care about him, and take care of him, as always and without complaints. Because of her good performance, many people in the community think she is a good wife and mother.
However, although Xiao Ya created the home very warmly and devoted all her efforts, her age and son's identity were still questioned by her husband's family. Moreover, every time she encounters this problem, her husband always obeys her family and does not give her any spiritual support.
As time goes by, the conflict between Xiaoya and her husband's family becomes deeper and deeper, and her relationship with her husband becomes colder and colder. In the end, she couldn't stand the mental torture and told her husband about her son's identity and her real age, hoping that her kind lies would be forgiven by him.
What he didn't expect was that when her husband knew this fact, he seemed particularly angry and kept accusing her of deception. His family also thought she was a deceitful woman and began to insult her verbally.
In the end, due to the deterioration of the relationship between the two parties, Xiao Ya and her husband chose to break up, ending her second failed marriage again.
Facing the camera, Xiaoya said: "Everything has cause and effect. If I didn't deceive him, I might not have had this marriage. I don't blame him, because such evil causes were planted by myself."
Brother Hui's opinion
There is an old saying: "No one is invincible," in the process of everyone's growth, they will inevitably make mistakes and learn to bear the consequences of this mistake. In order to pursue her love and bid farewell to a single life, Xiaoya chose what she thought was a "kind lie", which finally made her get what she wanted.
However, in the subsequent marriage life, she did not feel so happy, but felt guilty, walking on thin ice and living carefully. She tried different ways to make delicious food for her husband, deliberately creating a warm surface for the family, and at the same time she devoted herself to the family and did her best to be kind to her husband. However, none of this could ease her inner worries, and even put her on a heavy psychological burden.
In order to fulfill this "well-intentioned lie", you can imagine that she needs to use more lies to pile up every day, and in the end she is piled up and cannot continue. When her husband and family learned the truth, they began to question her character and motives, and doubted her purpose of marriage, which eventually made her unable to argue and had no choice but to break up.
In fact, for a person who loves you, he will tolerate all your shortcomings and accept all your family; and for a person who doesn’t love you, even if you expose your sincerity, he will never see it.
The beginning of Xiaoya's marriage is a mistake. If a man cannot accept your family, he will not be able to live with you sincerely. In order to enter the marriage, she adopted a deceptive approach, which made her even more mistakes. Therefore, the breakdown of this marriage is not accidental, but an inevitable.
likes this sentence online very much: Love is a one-way road. If you miss it, you will never come back. Only when two people are in a consistent pace and take neat steps can they reach the end together.
Therefore, love is a difficult practice and a choice without regrets. Only by treating each other sincerely and tolerating each other can we support each other and reach a perfect end.
What do you guys think about "kind lies"? Everyone is welcome to write your shining opinions in the comment section!
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Author profile: Brother Hui, a middle-aged uncle who has been running, hopes to use his clumsy words to wake up those sleepy people.
