In late autumn, the warm sunlight shines through the wooden lattice window lattice on the stilt building and sprinkles on my desk.
I closed the laptop that has been old for many years and stretched out my big waist. Okay, I posted three more chapters, more than 6,000 words. Today's basic task has been completed.
Check the time. It was almost noon. I got up and picked up the teacup and walked to the aisle outside the door. Leaning on the old wooden railing, looking into the distance.
There is a terraced field downstairs, reaching the valley at the foot of the mountain.
At this time, the rice has been harvested, and some water has been stored in the fields without rapeseed, and the self-grown seedlings has grown into green again. Some of them have planted rapeseed fields, and the rapeseed seedlings that have not been planted for a long time have also turned green. Show infinite vitality.
There are also courtyards covered with green trees and green bamboos between the mountainsides. Some of these courtyards are newly built small Western-style buildings, and more are the old-fashioned Sichuan East wooden houses where I live. Because people went out to work in recent years, after they had some money, they almost went down the mountain to buy a house or a city to live in.
Many villages in the mountains are actually hollow villages.
And such a quiet and beautiful pastoral countryside is exactly what I like. So I returned to my grandfather's ancestral house.
By the way, I am a network writer. So, this environment is exactly what I love.
I sat on the stilt building, holding a cup of tea, and taking another sip. The tea smells so good, very comfortable. I remembered the past again...
Looking at the endless mountains and looking back on the experiences over the years, although the storms and rains were ups and downs, I finally did what I like. It’s just that the woman who once suffered with me could not stand my poverty many years ago and left me.
Now my son is in college, and I live alone in the mountains. Although I have my own things to do every day, it is quite fulfilling, but when it is late at night, I can't help but feel lonely.
Yes, maybe I really need a woman around me, a woman who understands me and is also eye-catching. Of course, my ex-wife also asked my son to bring me a message to express her willingness to get back with me. But I didn't agree.
Actually, I was not satisfied with the life of working outside, and I worked hard to write, just to achieve a little career and give her a better life, so as to live up to the hardships she has suffered for so many years with me. But after all, she was just an ordinary mountain village woman and didn’t go to much school. We just got together on blind dates back then. I just liked her beauty back then.
But she didn't understand my heart at all, and I also pursued me. She just hopes that I, like other workers, will be satisfied with the basic monthly salary. In order to make more money, she even asked me to follow others to do construction. And I really went there, but after a few months, I still didn't do it anymore.
Because when I went to the canteen to make a meal that day, the beautiful woman who made a meal said to me, "I see that you are born a gentle man, but you are not the one who does this at first glance."
The woman's words made me think. Yes, why should I be the same as someone else? Why can't I do what I am good at? Who in this world knows yourself better than yourself? Why do you have to arrange your life by others and control it? Shouldn’t people fulfill themselves? Who will really care about your inner feelings? They only look at other people's affairs based on their cognition. How can a person who only knows repetitive work understand a soul that pursues art?
That day, I finally made a major decision in my life. I called my ex-wife and said I didn’t do construction anymore and I wanted to do what I like!
She was angry, "You don't want to do this, you don't want to do that."what you up to? Can you see a penny when you write that thing? What should I do if my son goes to school? ”
I said, “I can’t be wronged by myself for my son. I have to be responsible for my life! As for the raising of my son, I will certainly find a way! "
"What are you thinking about? Do you write that thing and let your son drink the northwest wind with you? Stop dreaming, you are not that material! You can't make that money, so you'd better work honestly! "
I still insisted.
She finally said, "Okay, if you want to do your own thing, then let's get divorced! "Her 's word
has been said many times, but every time I did not agree to my son's case, but continued to work with her. This time I did not give in. Because I knew that if I give in step by step, it might not take many years, and I would enter my old age in regret. What will accompany me will definitely be a lifelong regret, and no one will understand the pain in my heart. After
, we divorced, and I took my son.
I entered a company in Shenzhen to work as a warehouse manager. I would write crazy in my spare time. Sometimes I even went all night in the evening. No one could see my hard work and hardships. I could only swallow my inner bitterness alone.
I also heard from others that my ex-wife said that I would definitely regret divorced her, and that at that time I would only live a smile in the eyes of others. Words.
I ignored these. I know what I desire in my heart. I am not just for money, but also for the meaning of being born in the world. I just want to be worthwhile in this life, not necessarily living like others. Because in this world, people cannot be exactly the same!
This road is of course not easy to walk, I worked hard but not much reward. But I did not give up, but continued to summarize and improve.
Several years later, I finally resigned from the company in Shenzhen because I can already have the confidence to write full-time.
I returned to my hometown in the mountains in a low-key manner. The villagers in the mountains have the same knowledge as ordinary people. What they asked the most when they saw me was, "Why don't you work at a young age? What money can you make at home? "
I don't want to talk to them too much, I just smiled indifferently. In their eyes, if you don't be a state cadre, you can only work, go to factories, go to construction sites. Or at most do some small business. This is their knowledge and their vision. Because, they think they can only live like this!
I don't know how to judge them, maybe in their opinion, they are kind to me.
It's just that in a few months, when I drove a car worth hundreds of thousands of yuan into the village, they asked in surprise, "Where are you making a fortune? Don't you have no job? "
I just smiled, "I won the big prize of 10 million. "
" is it? Is there smoke from your ancestral tomb? "They looked confused.
I didn't have much explanation. Because I felt there was nothing to say. When I didn't have money, I didn't want people to know. It's my own business to live a better life. What do you do with others? And ordinary people only like to laugh at people who are poor, but they don't think of others living better than themselves. This is human nature! After
, I also prepared a house for my son in the city. I think I used to work outside and didn't care enough for him. Now, it's also very appropriate to do something for him.
My parents and relatives who have always looked down on me before have also become abnormal with me. I didn't say anything, after all, human nature is like this. When you have no money Even my parents will look down on you, let alone those relatives.
In order not to be disturbed, I moved to the hillside in the deep mountains alone to live.
My life is very simple. As long as I have a computer and a network cable, I can work. I planted flowers in the yard to adjust my life. I also built a fish pond in the terraced fields under the stilt building. I also built a pavilion. When I have time, I go fishing to relax.
I felt like I was enjoying such days at first, but over time, I became a little lonely again. After all, I am only in my forties, so there should be a woman around me.
But I don’t want to accept those women who only seek material things.I still want the true heart of a woman.
But in this era, true love is so scarce, how easy is it?
I mainly write emotional works, so I still have a thorough understanding of men and women. If I just want to find a woman to sleep with, I don’t think I need to get married. After all, you have some money now, and these are not a problem.
Besides, just for men, it is easy for men to deal with. If you look at it a little more, this physiological instinct can be completely restrained. Why bother with this? Because, feelings may be the most troublesome thing in the world.
But after all, we are mortals, and we still cannot completely get rid of seven emotions and six desires . I'm just that.
Finally one day, I met a woman online. She said she was in her thirties and had married before. She also had a daughter with her ex-husband. Now she works alone in a company. She is considered a white-collar worker and her income is OK.
We talked very well and later added WeChat. In the video, I am very satisfied with her, beautiful, plump, sexy and gentle, which is exactly the type I like. She said she really wanted to retire to the mountains and forests with her beloved man and be loving for a lifetime.
I was moved by her. She also fell in love with me at first sight
However, more than ten days later, she appeared in front of me.
She is more beautiful and seductive. Because we already have a deep understanding of it online. I really regret meeting each other too late at this time. We hugged each other tightly. I live alone in a large yard and no one disturbs our lives.
She seems to be very eager, we don’t have more language, and silence is better than sound at this time...
We all have rich life experience, so everything is so natural and harmonious.
We are completely immersed in our dreamy and fantastic world of two people in this small mountain village deep in Shushan.
I can see that she is very happy and satisfied, and she also brought me the long-lost happiness.
We are inseparable from each other. She followed me, taking care of my life with red sleeves.
I thought we could be together in the mountains until we grow old. Spend the rest of your life happily and lovingly.
But two months later, she said to her, "I want to go back to work!"
"Is it okay not to work? I can support you." I stared at her.
"I think women should be independent! Because I also have my own career! Besides, I don't want to stay in the mountains all the time, why don't you go to Shanghai with me?" She looked at me.
I understood what she meant. Maybe she came to the deep mountains to dream with me just to temporarily escape the hustle and bustle of the world. Perhaps, we are a flash in each other's lives!
So I said softly, "Will you come again?"
"Do you want me to come again?"
I nodded.
She smiled at me gently, "Okay, I will come when I miss you. You can come to me too!"
I smiled.
She hugged me again, and we were entangled together again...
But she left after all. Seeing her driving slowly down the mountain, finally hiding among the green mountains and green waters, I felt lost in my heart.
Maybe she is just a passerby in my life. It is not easy to find someone who truly loves you to accompany you for the rest of your life!
She has left, I still have to bear the boundless loneliness. As for whether she will come again? Who knows this? As for me going to find her, and does she really want me to enter her life again?
Life is already rushed, love is short, and I can only stay alone in this deep mountain!
