He Xingfu in "Happiness into Ten Thousand Family" is also a strong and brave heroine. An alien woman, with her own strength, has brought about earth-shaking changes in Wanjiazhuang.
Art comes from life, and there are many strong women in reality.
Most men know " Women are not as good as men" and also know how to respect their lovers. But there are still some men who think they are superior, look down on women in their bones, and even materialize women.
In marriage, if your husband treats you like this, women should not be weak, it is time to consider leaving.
01
First: The desire to control is suffocating
There are natural physical differences between men and women, so many men have been taught to take good care of girls since childhood.
A man with a desire to protect makes women feel safe. On the contrary, if a man shows not protection, but control and over-constraint, it becomes a nightmare.
colleagues never participate in the company's group activities every month. When the time comes, they hurried home. At first we thought we were thinking about the children at home, and although we thought she was not sociable, we could understand them.
After working overtime, I heard her call in the stairwell. The other party's roar was clearly heard several meters away: "You must go home within half an hour, it's not enough to be late. If you are late, see how I deal with you!"
When Yueyue returned to the office, the call from her husband never stopped. Finally, she handed over the work to us in tears and hurried back home.
Not long after, she was forced to resign because her husband couldn't accept that her workplace was far away from home and she also needed to work overtime from time to time. The boss was not satisfied with her long-term depression, which affected her work.
Later I learned that in the years after marriage, every step I took every month was under the control of my husband.
Which city you settle in after marriage, what kind of job you want, even what kind of clothes you wear, and what kind of hairstyle you want to keep is all up to your husband.
When she was young, she felt that this was the other person's concern for her. But as we spend more time together, this feeling of being controlled makes the moon and the day look like the year.
The husband treats her as a machine, not a flesh-and-blood person. He never cared about her real thoughts, just pressed every button and asked her to do things as directed.
This completely objectified life is suffocating and affects Yueyue's work and mood. In the end, she would rather live alone with her children than live with her husband.
Although single mother is also tired, her pace of life is adjusted completely according to her needs, and she lives a relaxed and happy life that she has never had before.
Marriage brings a couple together, but in fact they are still independent individuals and need to give each other a certain amount of space to seek common ground while reserving differences and respect each other.
Only by treating each other as partners with independent personalities can we empower each other and grow together. A man with too strong control will make you farther and farther away from happiness.
02
Second: Condescending, it makes people feel heartbroken
people all have the need to be respected. Women in marriage are gentle and round, but this does not mean that husbands can control them at will.
Women know how to show weakness, and their marriage will be happier, but if the husband really bullies women as weak, it would be a big mistake.
Unequal marriage relationships are often the most difficult to maintain. But some husbands still retain the feudal ideas from hundreds of years ago, thinking that their wife was marrying her home to serve him.
Little do you know that in modern society, women have already supported half of the sky.
There are many strong women who are in the company. Even the wives who retire to their families and become full-time mothers, they have made contributions to their families and are no less than anyone else.
A friend once told me that her father was very macho and always waited for his tired mother to bring him foot wash water and serve him to wash his feet before going to bed.
Once, he felt the water temperature was a little cold, so he kicked the washbasin open. The water stains splashed all over his mother, and he scolded her fiercely.
In this winter, my friend looked at her trembling mother and stood up to protect her, shouting angrily that he asked her father to get her foot wash himself.
turned around and told my mother that she would never have to prepare foot washing water for her father again. Her father has hands and feet and can do it by himself.
You are husband and wife, not maids or young masters, and no one has a higher status than anyone else.
After my friend said this, his father and mother blushed. From then on, my father had more respect and consideration for his mother, and he no longer looked at his father's expression and did things tremblingly.
After a hundred years of cultivation, we should know how to sleep together. When dealing with our pillow, we should know how to respect and cherish each other, and give each other a sense of security and respect, rather than always demanding and scolding each other with a condescending attitude.
If you feel that your husband always acts superior in front of you, making you inferior and cowardly, then you must be vigilant. Learn to express your thoughts correctly and break this unequal pattern of getting along.
03
Third: Stop growth and disappoint people
Society is progressing, information changes continuously, and lifelong learning is a necessary ability. Regardless of men and women, and before and after marriage, you must study hard and improve yourself so that you will not be eliminated by life.
But there is a type of husband who is afraid of his wife's progress and always worry that the other party will become better and better, so they can't keep her. To put it further, this comes from the inferiority complex in a man’s heart.
Before going to further study, my best friend Duoduo decisively handled the divorce procedures with her husband.
She loves art and has worked for 6 years and encountered a rare opportunity to further study. If you return from further study smoothly, your salary and position will be improved.
Just as she was actively preparing, her husband kept sarcasticating her. First, it was useless to crack down on her age, and then she also brought out the pressure from both parents to make her stop studying.
In contrast, my husband has worked for several years without savings. I was scrambling to live a day at work, and when I got home, I just lie on the sofa to watch videos.
When my best friend was having a video with me, my eyes were filled with light. She said it was so happy to learn what she liked. You must also continue to learn and continue to grow.
I am really happy for my best friend. She did not stop moving forward because of her lover. Every day she lives now is fulfilling and satisfied.
Life lessons must be completed with serious efforts. Everyone can deliver a satisfactory answer through continuous learning. If your partner can fight alongside you and make progress together, that is the luckiest thing.
If he is not enterprising and still blocks your growth in every way, then he must measure it carefully whether it is worth giving up a bright future for such a teammate.
Compare the above content to see if your husband has these characteristics? If you have difficult questions in marriage and want to find someone to come up with an idea, you can come to me and believe I can help you.
