A fan asked me: "We are both single women in their 30s. Why are the situations of Fan Shengmei and Andy so different?" I thought about it and answered: "Although they are similar in age, they have chosen different ways of living. ”

Zhuang Diexiaomeng/seeing the essence through stories

an original emotional number worthy of your attention

illustrations/from the Internet

A fan asked me: "We are both older unmarried women in their 30s, why Fan Shengmei and Andy 's situation is so different."

I thought about it and replied: "Although they are similar in age, they have chosen different ways of living. "

Andy has a high IQ and is very rational in everything he does. Fan Shengmei treats life very well. Full of fantasy, always wanting to change destiny through men.

So they have a completely different situation.

The ancients said: "You stand at thirty."

30 is supposed to be an age with special significance. It is when youth fades away and becomes mature, and changes from sensibility to rationality. Only in this way can one stand up.

For women over 30, the best way to live is not to rely on a certain man with full expectations, but to hold on to the word "rationality".

Treat feelings rationally and not be trapped by love.

Zhang Zhixin once said: "Love is indispensable, but it can only be an accelerator to push us forward, not a stumbling block to work and study."

Emotions are always a pair of hands to people. A sword, if handled well, can make a life successful; if handled improperly, it can ruin a life.

Lin Huiyin and Lu Xiaoman were both among the top ten talented women in the Republic of China, but they had completely different endings, and this difference started with their feelings.

Lin Huiyin once met the poet Xu Zhimo. They admired each other and had a common language, but at that time Xu Zhimo was already married and had a son.

Xu Zhimo's identity discouraged Lin Huiyin, so she took the initiative to keep a distance from him, and followed her family's arrangement to marry the architect Liang Sicheng.

Under the guidance of her husband, Lin Huiyin also became a female architect. Together with her husband, she made outstanding contributions to the country and became a woman respected by people.

As for Lu Xiaoman, her talent was originally superior to that of Lin Huiyin, and her marriage was also very happy, but she didn't know how to cherish it, and chose Xu Zhimo in pursuit of temporary freshness, thus making her life a mess.

When future generations mention Lu Xiaoman, the first thing they think of is her romantic gossip, not her talent.

Many times, feelings will affect life. A choice, a direction is a path.

Women after the age of 30 should not think about love and love all day long, and they should not waste their lives for so-called love. Being trapped by love and confused by love is a matter for children, not for adults.

Anyone who has experienced it knows that the so-called love is just a flash in the pan. No matter how beautiful it is, it will eventually wither one day.

It is naturally not worth it to ruin one's life for the sake of temporary happiness.

Women after the age of 30 should treat emotions rationally, consider everything carefully, have a long-term perspective, and never act emotionally.

Treat marriage rationally and take responsibility

Lin Huiyin has many advantages worth learning from, especially her attitude towards relationships and marriage.

Giving up Xu Zhimo and choosing Liang Sicheng was already a successful trend, and after getting married, she did another admirable thing.

As we all know, Lin Huiyin was a talented woman in the Republic of China. As a woman with both talent and beauty, it is reasonable for someone to admire her, even if she is a married woman.

Jin Yuelin It seems to be no secret at all that Jin Yuelin loves Lin Huiyin. In fact, Lin Huiyin once bravely expressed her feelings for Jin Yuelin to Liang Sicheng. She said to Liang Sicheng: "I seem to have fallen in love with Jin Yuelin."

Liang Sicheng went through a lot of pain After thinking about it, he said to her: "You are free."

But Lin Huiyin did not accept this freedom. She chose to restrain her feelings and treat Jin Yuelin with courtesy.

The famous actor Chen Daoming once said this: "Every marriage will be distracted, but it mainly depends on whether you can take action and whether you have self-control."

After a long period of getting along, the relationship between husband and wife will become more and more dull, and the former love will gradually turn into family affection. If temptation appears at this time, many people will inevitably become distracted.

It is understandable to be temporarily distracted. As long as you know how to suppress it, you will not make mistakes.

Marriage is not love but responsibility. Only people with a strong sense of responsibility can manage a marriage well and have a beautiful and harmonious family.

It is very strange to ruin a marriage just for a moment of novelty. Irrational behavior, because love is a short-lived existence. No matter who you are with, it will become dull after a long time.

If you don't know how to restrain yourself, if you can't shoulder the responsibility, you will only be in the reincarnation of your favorite. You waste the rest of your life and harm others and yourself.

Marriage requires rationality. Only by using reason to decide the direction and controlling external temptations can you defend your family.

Treat life rationally and remain independent.

" Meng Hua Lu ". Zhao Pan'er is a very rational person. Although she took the wrong path and paid the price for it, she also knew how to learn lessons and live with a rational attitude.

She and Gu Qianfan truly love each other. With Gu Qianfan, she It didn't have to be so hard, but she still insisted on doing business because this was her pursuit.

She once said: "A woman's most important thing is to be independent. Once she wants to rely on a man, she will have a weakness." "

This sentence is very subtle and suitable for all women.

30-year-old women's attitude towards life should be based on self-reliance, keeping the steering wheel of life firmly in their own hands, rather than letting others manipulate them.

Even if there are people to rely on, You can't throw away your own survival skills, because this is the foundation of building a human being.

I have a saying: "Misfortune lies on the back of good fortune, and good fortune lies on the back of misfortune." "

People in this life are interdependent for blessings and misfortunes. No one knows what will happen in the future.

As the saying goes, it is better to rely on others than to rely on yourself, because the initiative of relying on others is ultimately in the hands of others. Only by relying on yourself can you take the initiative in life. .

Conclusion:

Most women spend the first half of their lives between ignorance and confusion. The second half of their lives should be rational.

Keep your mind clear at all times, use reason to analyze everything, and explore. The road ahead.

In this way, you will not go astray, and you can also avoid many unnecessary disasters.

The first half of your life will be hazy, and the second half of your life will naturally be walked carefully.

Zhuang Diexiaomeng/Original author of the emotional column.

May your life be full of surprises, may your happiness come as expected