Author | Hexu
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9 He is good to anyone and can give all his heart to anyone. However, he is not to play with feelings because he is nice to everyone, it's just his heart.
A man like
treats his beloved woman only better.
However, not all women can understand his goodness is just kindness and not love, so he often has rotten peach blossoms.
Blue Ocean is a man with a very good personality. He is very friendly to everyone. His personality is very similar to the second man in the novel.
Blue Ocean’s long-standing distress is that he has met many times when friends of the opposite sex fall in love with him, but he just treats his wife as a friend, and in the end he is too old to talk.
Lan Hai wonders why he really treats a girl as a friend, and the two get along very well, but in the end it ends up being old and dead.
If it hadn't met Zhilan, Blue Ocean would never have known the "mystery" of this problem in its entire life.
Zhilan is a new colleague from the company, and Lan Hai is an old man in the company, so he takes great care of Zhilan.
On weekdays, Lan Hai will often chat with Zhilan to understand Zhilan's mood during the day. On weekends and holidays, he would take the initiative to ask Zhilan to come out to play.
maybe because two people like to play games,Therefore, when Lan Hai and Zhilan are together, there will be endless conversations.
On the day of Zhilan's birthday, Lan Hai kept the zero o'clock and said happy birthday to Zhilan. Not only that, he also prepared a birthday present for Zhilan.
That birthday gift is still what Zhilan has always wanted.
The various actions of Blue Sea made Zhilan mistakenly think that Blue Sea likes her too, so Zhilan took the initiative to confess with Blue Sea.
On the day Zhilan and Lan Hai confessed, Lan Hai was taken aback, because he felt that the same scene had happened again, and suddenly felt very uncomfortable.
Lan Hai was embarrassed and nervously said: "I'm sorry, I only regard you as a good friend."
Upon hearing Lan Hai's refusal, Zhilan frowned, her nose was a bit sour, but finally her clenched fist tightened and loosened. . She asked calmly: "If doesn't like me, why should you be so good to me? Chat with me every day and remember what I like... Do you know that your behavior will make girls misunderstand ."
After Zhilan said these words, she turned around and ran away, leaving Lan Hai stunned by herself. After
, even if the two met frequently at the company, Zhilan was estranged intentionally, and Lan Hai deeply understood that they would not be able to return to the past.
Fortunately, after losing a friend with heartache, he finally understood that there should be a distance between men and women.
These friendly behaviors of men can make women mistaken for love.
1. Frequent chatting with her: excessive contact
In the cognition of most women, they think that only a man who is moved by her will frequently chat with her.
Because time is limited, only if she is precious enough, men will take the initiative to chat with her. Perhaps it is based on this recognition that a woman can easily develop feelings for a man who often chats with her, and it is easy to misunderstand that a man who often talks to her likes her.
So if you really just treat a woman as a good friend, then you shouldn't talk to her so often.
If you really have to talk to her and like to talk to her, then you must at least verbally let the other person know that you just treat her as a good friend, or "good buddy" "That's it.
The most taboo thing is that you do not let the other party know that you are just treating her as a friend, and chat with her frequently. This will only make her mistake friendship for "love".
In addition, when chatting, try to use less ambiguous language like "you and me" and "don't be afraid" to confuse her cognition.
When you care too much, it is easy to cause misunderstandings.
2. Remember her preferences: over
There is actually a distance between friends of the opposite sex. Even if the relationship is very good, it may not be possible to know the other person. Preferences.
The exchanges between friends of the opposite sex are often careless, with mutual ridicule and mutual care, but they may not be able to memorize all the other's preferences in such a delicate manner and give each other a considerate "heart".
Remember all the other’s preferences,It is an over-attention performance , which will make a woman feel that your kindness to her has crossed the boundaries of friendship, so she will feel that you like her.
Boyfriends may not be able to be so diligent, so under habitual thinking, they will misunderstand your "diligence".
Men’s thinking is sometimes a straight line emotionally, and they often don’t think so much. They are informal and rely on temperament. But a woman will complicate feelings because of her sensibility, and she will magnify your goodness, so it is easy to misunderstand your actions.
3. Frequent gifting to women: "to please" excessively
The meaning behind frequent gifting to a woman is generally regarded by women as a "pleasure" concern.
Friends of the opposite sex often don't need to please each other, only love.
So, when a man always gives a woman gifts frequently, it will make that woman think about love.
If you look at it as an outsider, and you often give gifts to a woman, you will also misunderstand that you are pursuing such behavior.
There is nothing wrong with being good to friends, but there is always a difference between friends of the same sex and friends of the opposite sex. Friends of the opposite sex need to maintain a certain sense of distance when interacting, otherwise it is easy for the person to confuse your feelings.
If you are really such a warm guy who is good to your friends, then you must at least let a woman know that you are so good to everyone, and she is not the special one.
Sometimes, there are information gaps in your circle of friends. After all, your friend and your friend may not know each other, so she may not know that you are so good to all friends of the opposite sex.
If you are often annoyed by friends of the opposite sex who like you, then you should learn how friends treat women in women’s cognition: Don’t chat with her frequently, and don’t care too much about her. Don't be too pleased with her. If you are at a distance, a woman will treat you as a true friend and will not misunderstand you.
Sometimes women will have the illusion of "that man likes me", not because the woman is affectionate, but may be caused by the wrong information given by the man.
If a man really wants to be a normal friend with a woman, then what is needed is to reach the friend's scale in the woman's perception, not to treat each other well in a man's way.
Friends of the opposite sex are often more sensitive, and only when they are measured and distanced can friendship become friendship. There is no illusion about love at all.
END
I am Hexu, a creator in the field of emotion with a rich heart, and I specialize in emotional articles. I hope my words can give you healing power and warmth, welcome to pay attention, thank you.
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