In real life, when dealing with opposite sexes, one often hears someone say something like this: "She is married and has children, and I also have a family. How could there be anything between me and her". This is obviously an explanation of one's own behavior, in order to prove that oneself and a certain married opposite sex are innocent, so that others do not doubt their relationship.
However, judging from the actual situation, most of the real cases of extramarital affairs in real life happen precisely between two members of the opposite sex who are married and have families. Therefore, between two members of the opposite sex who are married and have a family, it is more important to keep a good balance of the relationship between them, and they should not have frequent and close contact. Moreover, an extramarital affair between two married heterosexuals has more serious consequences, and it destroys two families.
01
I am 37 years old and have been married to my husband for 9 years and have an 8-year-old daughter. My husband and I are in free love, and the two are college classmates. But at first we were not together. After graduation, we have been working for a while. By chance, the two of us met again. At that time, they were all in a confused stage of the future direction. When the two people chatted, they all felt the same. The more they talked, the more speculative, and then slowly established a romantic relationship.
Two people support each other and accompany each other. After joint efforts, each has found its own direction, and the relationship between each other has become more and more stable. After being in love for 4 years, we entered the marriage hall and gave birth to a daughter in the second year of marriage. We became a happy family of three.
In the first year of my child, I watched the child at home. Later, when the child got older, I continued to go out to work. The old man helped to bring the child. My husband and I both have stable jobs, and the two get along very well, there is no major conflict, and some people help to share the pressure of raising children. In the past few years of marriage, it can be said that our life is still very happy.
02
However, this happy life, because of my personal reasons, was buried with huge hidden dangers. This matter will start at the beginning of this year, and it is related to a male colleague of mine.
This male colleague and I are both old employees of this company. We have known each other for a long time and we have always had a good relationship. Of course, we still have more contact at work, because our work often needs to be connected, and the exchanges are quite tacit. We didn't have much contact in private. He is also married and has a daughter. But since the beginning of this year, because of a special event, our contact has become more frequent, and the curse has come down from this.
The thing is like this. At the beginning of the year, when I was communicating with him about some work content, I found that he was always absent-minded. Originally, the communication between the two of us was very tacit and smooth, but during that time, he seemed to be distracted. I told him many things, but he always asked me again afterwards. I felt that something was wrong with him, as if he was worried. Sometimes, watching him sit there in a daze, his expression is painful for a while, and then it seems to be angry. I couldn't hold back it for a while, so I asked him what was wrong, but he didn't say anything at the time.
03
As a result, a few days later, he was still the same, which caused problems with our work connection. I asked again, but he stopped talking, looking very embarrassed. Later, he said, "I can't say a word or two. Do you have time after get off work? If it is convenient, have a meal together." I didn't think much about it at the time, so I agreed to him, because I thought he was very uncomfortable, and it seemed that I really needed someone to talk to him.
After get off work that day, the two of us went to dinner together. He deliberately chose a place where there are not many individuals. During the meal, he told me the reason why his condition was wrong recently. It turned out that his wife cheated and cheated a male netizen. He only found out after accidentally discovering his wife's chat history.
His wife has always been at home full-time. I don't know if it was because she was too bored to chat on the Internet. In the end, she became an online dating. Later, the male netizen offered to meet,After several times, his wife was shaken and met with the male netizen and had a relationship. Afterwards, his wife actually regretted and wanted to sever relationship with that netizen, but the netizen kept entangled. It was when his wife was entangled with that netizen that he was discovered.
04
After his showdown, his wife was terrified and cried and begged him for forgiveness. He also called his wife's male netizen. When the other party was discovered, Limara was so scared that he hacked all his contact information, and he didn't dare to pester his wife anymore.
He also thought about divorce, but after all he has children, and he also has feelings for his wife. But without divorce, his knot has never been able to pass. He is also Xinxin because of these, he is unable to concentrate at work every day. To be honest, if I knew he was for this reason, I might not agree to go out for dinner with him. However, it was too late to regret at that time, and I could only comfort him with a thick scalp.
Actually, this kind of thing can be solved with a few words of comfort. But he doesn't seem to need any comfort from me. He just wants someone to listen to him. From then on, the contact between the two of us became frequent. In the past, it was only work contact, but since then, he often talked to me privately or had a meal or something. It seems that because he has already told me the biggest secret, he doesn't seem to need to hide anything from me. He basically opens up to me and tells me everything in his heart.
05
At the beginning, I was mainly a listening role. Later, slowly, I would also tell him some of my own things, some of my own thoughts. And as this contact became more frequent and we talked more and more, the relationship between the two of us also changed unknowingly. It is no longer the relationship of ordinary colleagues, nor the relationship of ordinary friends. It seems that there are more and more ambiguous things. This change is so subtle that I didn't notice it at first, but when I realized something was wrong, I couldn't control it.
Just after we had frequent contact for more than two months, I had a relationship with him and I cheated. Originally he was sad because his wife cheated,I am comforting and enlightening him. Unexpectedly, when things developed to the end, I actually had a relationship with him and got myself into an extramarital affair.
Since I had a relationship with him, I have been in a very painful state. On the one hand, I feel guilty for my husband and children. I feel sorry for them and the family. On the other hand, I don’t know how to deal with this extramarital affair. I can’t break it even if I want to. If I continue, I know that there can be no good results. Every day I am afraid of being discovered by my husband. Sometimes I will dream of the scene of my husband divorcing me when I go to bed at night. What should I do and how can I get rid of it completely?
Conclusion:
People of the opposite sex should pay attention to scale and boundaries, especially for married people. If you are a married person, you should consciously maintain a clear boundary with the opposite sex outside of your marriage. Don't cause trouble to your family because of the ambiguity in your relationship with other opposite sexes. If you are unmarried, then you have to keep a clear line with the married person of the opposite sex. Don't affect other people's family stability because of your inappropriate behavior. As for two opposite sexes who are both married, it is more important to stay awake at all times and do not communicate too frequently, because if something happens, the families of both parties will be destroyed.
From meeting and acquaintance, to falling in love, and finally being able to cultivate Zhengguo into marriage, this is a hard-won fate and luck for each. Therefore, both people should cherish this marriage, cherish this fortune, take good care of their marriage, and safeguard their family. This is responsible for the family, responsible for the partner, but also responsible for oneself.
Only by maintaining such a mentality of being responsible to the family and to oneself can we stay awake in the face of the disturbance and temptation of the outside world, and will not go the wrong way. If you are only immersed in the restlessness of desire when facing some temptations,If you forget your responsibilities, you will inevitably lose your way and do things you regret beyond your reach. At that time, everything is too late.
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