There is a saying that is called knowledge changes destiny. However, even if one has a high degree of education, it can change a person's life trajectory, but it cannot change his inertial thoughts under the influence of his native family.
Many people are complaining about the "Phoenix man", who has a high IQ, but EQ will be much worse. This type of person often puts his wife in a dilemma. He always feels that his parents are always right, and he will carry out some of his parents' ideas without compromise. For his brothers and sisters, he will show a state of "burning blood", sacrificing himself, but also to fulfill them.
Especially if you don’t have a son, your own world is incomplete, and you don’t have the right to get the best resources. If you have a younger brother and your younger brother has a son, then you will think: " I cultivated my nephew well, he is our family’s hope.
, although he has the kind of "" that Chinese people cannot understand. "Inheritance", but what is passed on must have positive attributes. The value of "patriarchy" must be passed on to the daughter who is wronged. What is the point of passing it on?
If you want to really inherit the family,To meet a requirement, every member of the family is willing to put the collective interests first. In other words, you think for the sake of your nephew, is there anyone who thinks for the sake of your daughter? If you don’t have one, you have to have a clear understanding of your current situation.
Fan Changhui told his marriage story in a private message, and when his wife left, did he know how outrageous he was.
is called the Phoenix Man, and I think there is nothing wrong with it.
Changhui grew up in a rural area. Because of his good grades, he was willing to work hard and endure hardships. He was admitted as a civil servant and had a good job in the city. He has kissed many times. Many city girls are reluctant to continue to associate with him because he is from the countryside and there is a younger brother. Not suitable."
He was a bit disgusted, and felt that the girls in the city were not only hypocritical, but also very selfish. They always thought of themselves and never considered her family. No matter how good the conditions are, it is not rare for me.
Later,He and Xiaomei are married. Xiaomei and he are fellows. She doesn't have a high culture, but she has a hardworking life. With a snack stall, she slowly built her own shop. The business is good and the income is quite high. Xiaomei thinks that Changhui is educated, and being with him is a good choice.
are also rural people, Xiaomei doesn't think "Phoenix Man" is bad, but the rural people pay more attention to filial piety, and the things they pay attention to are different from those in the city. Moreover, Changhui has a high level of education, so he will definitely not do anything stupid. However, after a period of marriage, she knew that she was still too naive.
Changhui works very hard and does not make a lot of money, but the work is relatively easy. He just stayed at home and didn't go to her snack bar to help, on the grounds that he was "shameful". The words are: "I am a national civil servant, how can I go to work with my daughter-in-law, and do the work of doing dishes and washing dishes." When people were too busy, he called a relative from his hometown, paid him, and asked him to help in the shop.
Changhui is really filial. Every time he goes back to his hometown, giving his parents money is money, and things are things. Not only parents, but also brothers and sister-in-law have valuable gifts. Xiaomei knows that a man is satisfying her vanity, but she still feels uncomfortable. On Valentine's Day, she didn’t buy a rose for herself. She gave her brother a tablet and spent 3000 yuan for her brother-in-law. I bought a coat.
Not to mention parents, every time you go home, 30,000 yuan may not be enough. And Changhui's monthly salary is up to 8,000. To put it bluntly, he "extensively" at home, most of which are made by Xiaomei.
These make Xiaomei already very uncomfortable, but she knows that this kind of man likes this look, and the husband can still afford the money for his "extension", and find a better man. Must bear a certain price. Therefore, Xiaomei hasn't said anything for so many years.
husband does not value his children and makes his wife completely sad.
Xiaomei's child was born. She is a girl. Xiaomei likes her very much. She named her Xiaole. I hope she can grow up happily. Changhui didn't like girls in the first place, so he was indifferent to children. When he knew that Xiaomei's body was not very good and it was difficult to have a second child, he became even more indifferent to both mother and daughter.
Xiaomei is in the confinement,Relatives in her hometown helped take care of it. After confinement, the store's business still needs to be done, so she pushed the crib into a small storage room in the store to watch the children while doing business.
Not long after, the nephew was born, he was so happy, he drank a few glasses of wine, and kept muttering " my house is finally back , that happy ," I am much happier than when I gave birth to my daughter.
Not only that, but some things that Changhui did made Xiaomei disappointed. After her daughter Xiaole was born, her father did not buy her a toy, nor did he buy her clothes, or even hugged the child properly. However, the affection for my nephew is different.
I first wrapped a 10,000 yuan red envelope for my nephew at the full moon gift, and then he hugged him again, and praised his brother-in-law as the great hero of their family. Later, I bought clothes for my nephew, milk powder, toys, diapers, and spent thousands of dollars at every turn.
Xiaomei can’t be calm, so she quarrels with Changhui: " can still kiss her nephew more than her own daughter? I don’t know what you think, the child is still young and ignorant. If you grow up and your father only loves other people’s children and doesn’t care for her, how sad would you make her? It is the root of my family! ” Phoenix man neglects his daughter to subsidize his nephew,The wife decisively stopped losses. Xiaomei's face was cold, and then she packed up everything about Changhui, and then sent a divorce agreement, saying to him: "When I got married, I bought the house before marriage. You are more suitable to go back. Living with your nephew, I will be a child and never have you as a father!"
Changhui was kicked out of the house by Xiaomei, thinking she was just losing her temper, but she did not expect Xiaomei to sell the house and open it again. Opened a new store and devoted himself to the business. After the two divorced, Changhui cheered for some money. He never mentioned the custody of his daughter. In his heart, his daughter has no status.
Changhui divorced for half a year, and no one in the family cared about his well-being. For a while, I was tight and wanted to borrow some money from my younger brother. Don't lend him a penny. He wants to live at home for a period of time, his brother said: "The house is mine, I gave birth to a son, and the family's ancestral home is mine. It is not suitable for you to live in, and I am too embarrassed to ask you for rent."
At this time, Changhui understood who was treating him well, but his wife refused to look back. Even if he regretted it, it was too late.
Don't be too stupid or naive.
Many men make such a mistake,The enthusiasm is only for parents and brothers. Parents and brothers are the closest people, and the wife is an outsider. If you give birth to a daughter, it is useless. You will have to marry sooner or later. They don't understand what a family is called to run a family, and when the original family creates a character, it is flawed.
Even with a high degree of education, some things in the bones cannot be changed. He will be very vain, he will be very ostentatious in doing things. He will not work hard to take care of the family, but will do something incomprehensible. He thinks he is right. In fact, he hurts his wife and children and makes them chill.
If a man wants to show the spirit of "male chauvinism" and feel that he has a heroic spirit, don't think that being a hero in front of outsiders is great, not to mention that you want to inherit this family and carry it forward.
Before you have this idea, take care of your small family first. Let your wife and children feel the warmth because of the presence of the husband, feel safe, and be a hero of wives and children, only to show the true qualities of a man and be called a good man.
Today's topic:
What would you do if your husband is patriarchal?
welcome to leave a message,Give your opinion.
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