7 on the second unit is required to "learn to remember things", and specifically mention "the narrative should be organized" and "it must be able to convey emotions". So how can this be achieved? One of the keys is the organization and selection of materials.
combined with several articles in the second unit, I led the students to sort them out.
- material selection
The article "Walking" thinks: Does the author's family of four have only differences when taking a walk? Why did he choose this event? (There must be other differences. Choose this because it is representative and has a small relationship)
The article " Autumn Nostalgia " thinks: Why do you need to write about looking at chrysanthemums? Is it okay to write about going out for dinner? (Of course you can write about eating out, but looking at chrysanthemums is more poetic and profound, and things are small and big)
The article "The Person Who Reshapes Life" thinks: Why does the author focus on the difference between "cup" and "water" in writing? (Because after this incident, my understanding of external things changed fundamentally, which was the turning point in my life.)
So I concluded that the choice of materials should be typical. The so-called typicality is to represent the character image or highlight the main theme, which is generally a small matter. You can list some events when writing and filter them.
2. Organization of materials
The article "Walking" is thought: Can this article have other topics? (Students gave "Big Road·Little Road" and "Mother·Son". This title means that this article focuses on conflicts and conflicts, and is written around conflicts.)
"Autumn Nostalgia" article, thinking: Does the author only miss his mother in autumn? Why do you choose to use autumn as a carrier of nostalgia? (It must be that I miss you all year round. Choose this season because autumn represents maturity and I have matured my mind.)
The article "The Person Who Reshapes Life" thinks: How did the author connect the various events after the arrival of teacher Sally ? (On the surface, it is in chronological order, but in the actual logical order, written in the order of Helen 's understanding of the outside world from shallow to deep.)
So we concluded that the organizational materials should have "a number". Writing around this "number" will constitute the highlight of the article.
3. When writing, you must have a "key + center" awareness
"Walk" focuses on the process of walking, the center is filial piety
"Autumn Nostalgia" focuses on the mother's care for "me", and the center is the "me"'s nostalgia for her mother.
"The Person Who Reshapes Life" focuses on people - Teacher Sullivan's teaching to me, the center is on reshaping life.
So how do you reflect the center through the focus? Take "The Person Who Reshapes Life" as an example: First, describe Teacher Sally positively, and second, describe indirectly, through the psychological feelings of "I" and the description of scenery, " Reshapes Life ".
So we came to the conclusion: if you want to highlight the center when writing, you must use various techniques to reflect them in the key parts.
Because these articles are full of affection, students shed tears in the lecture "When I Miss Autumn", and Helen shed tears in "The Man Who Reshapes Life", based on this, the composition title "I Tears at That Moment". After the composition was collected, the teaching objectives were basically achieved, but a problem arose: some compositions were not conveying emotions enough and empathetic enough, which seemed pretentious.
For example, a classmate wrote that on the day of graduation from elementary school, everyone cried, and we were reluctant to part with the primary school teachers and classmates; a classmate wrote that the old man passed away, and I cried bitterly at the funeral, and the whole funeral process was immersed in sadness. But the whole article seems to be repeated in different sentences saying "I'm crying", and the teacher cannot empathize.
So I studied " From Baicaoyuan to Sanwei Bookstore " and thought: Why is Lu Xun sad to leave Baicaoyuan? (Because Baicao Garden is a paradise that allows me to pull out weeds and catch insects, because Baicao Garden has beautiful snakes that make me both afraid and inexplicably excited, because Baicao Garden has events that failed to catch birds but are warm) If Lu Xun did not write these contents, he only wrote that Baicao Garden is my paradise, can you feel his reluctance?
Conclusion: Expressing emotions must be based on events, otherwise it is easy to cause whining without any illness.
was modified again, and more than ten excellent essays emerged in the class. Attached, this masterpiece was displayed in the class, many students burst into tears, and even came to me after class to tell me about their longing for their deceased relatives. As a student who has just entered the first or two months of junior high school, it is not easy to write such an article.
At that moment, I burst into tears
On April 20, 2010, grandpa left. (Flash-to-point, straight to the hearts of the people)
About the early morning of the 18th, my mother received the news that her grandfather was critically ill and hurriedly drove away. The eyes are very red. The next day, my father asked for leave for us and took me and my sister to set off.
I didn’t cry all the way. It was strange that I could cry after taking the exam for 50, I could cry after running and falling, and I could cry even if I didn’t know how to do math problems. But my grandfather, who has been with me since childhood, is critically ill, but I can't shed tears at all. I was a little overwhelmed. (small compared to big, thought-provoking)
After two days of car, I finally arrived at my hometown, but what came was the bad news of the death of the master.
I stared at my grandfather's coffin for a long time, and my mind was blank; suddenly, every bit of it that I was with my grandfather when I was a child burst out in my mind. At that moment, I burst into tears, tears and snot, and my mother rushed to wipe my cheeks. ""
Grandpa left, leaving that he would never see. (Leave that I will never see, this sentence is full of infinite sadness)
No one will secretly buy chocolate on his back and say to me, "Mansun, eat it." No one will take me to his wardrobe and take out 10 yuan and say, "If Mansun wants money, come here to get it." No one will hold me and say carefully after making me cry, "I'm sorry, my master is wrong, Mansun won't cry." I finally understood that my grandfather has left and will never come back. (a few words, a simple way to convey feelings)
Later, one night, I chatted with my mother. She said that the grandfather choked during dinner that day, and the grandmother rushed her to the hospital in a hurry. The doctor really worked hard to save her. "Your grandpa is a person who has been thinking about others all his life, and he doesn't even bother his relatives even when he dies." Mom said sadly, "I didn't say anything, but my mind was the master's hearty laughter and kind face.
I know my grandfather will not appear in front of me again, but he will always be there, in my memory, in my mind, in my dreams. I hope my dear grandpa will be a free and happy god in the sky, not to live for anyone, but only for myself. Man Sun will always remember you. (words are endless but meaning is endless)
