In the growth process of a child, the person who has the greatest influence on the child is the parent. Even if the teacher has to take the responsibility of educating the child, there is no way to compare the education of the teacher and the education of the parent, because parents and children have the most contact time. Longer and closer to the child, the impact on the child is naturally greater.
But now there are many parents who will spoil their children too much. The direct consequence of parents doing this is to raise their children into an annoying "bear child". What these "bear children" did seems to be their own fault. In fact, the main problem is not the children, but the parents.
On November 10, a video went viral on the Internet. A child in a kindergarten in Ya'an, Sichuan kept hitting the teacher with a stool, and the teacher caught it with agility.
Video screenshot
It is understood that the child did not eat honestly. After being criticized by the teacher for two sentences, the child began to throw stool. Parents have already criticized education.
comments from netizens
Many netizens said that parents should reflect on it.
How should parents deal with child violence?
Correctly understand violent behavior and stop it with a clear attitude. Many parents have encountered such a situation. When the child waved to hit someone, the hit person would pretend to be invincible and then laugh and fight with the child. In fact, this is not good. Sometimes the child hits someone. Unconsciously, but if you laugh and fight with him at this time, it will make the child mistakenly think that beating is a good behavior, which will make everyone happy, so over time you develop the habit of beating, as a parent encounters a child beating Be sure to stop and tell the child clearly that it is not right to do so.
cultivate children's language and communication skills. Sometimes children hit people to attract the attention of others, because children's language skills are not enough to attract the attention of other children or even adults through words, and can only be achieved through intense body language in anxiousness The purpose of attracting the attention of others, but fierce body language is prone to violent behavior. As a parent, it is necessary to cultivate children's communication skills so that children can achieve their goals through language.
educate children in a calm tone. Many parents like to severely reprimand their children when they make mistakes, thinking that the children will be afraid to recognize the mistakes. In fact, severe reprimands not only prevent the children from recognizing the mistakes, but also easily stimulate the children to have rebellious psychology and become irritable . For violent tendencies, the correct approach should be to point out the child’s mistakes in a calm tone and educate the child on what to do, maintain the child’s self-esteem in a way of talking and let him recognize the mistake.
Don't let children watch audio-visual products about violence. Children are weak in distinguishing right from wrong and strong in imitating. They often imitate what they see. Images of violent behavior can easily stimulate children's nerves and allow them to imitate. As parents, do not let children watch "violent movies."
Don't spoil yourself too much. Parents blindly accommodating their children’s requirements, which is not advisable. For children’s requirements that are not too excessive, they can be guided to divert attention and lose interest in what was just now; and some principled issues must be adhered to Blindly contentment will only increase the child's squeamishness, and over time, once they are not satisfied, they will be prone to violent behavior. Children must be clearly aware of what is right or wrong.
Set a good example for children. Parents must not quarrel in front of their children, and resolutely prohibit fighting , let the children follow the violent environment, lead by example, be friendly to others, and provide a good image for the children to imitate.
Classification of child violence behaviors
child violence is generally manifested in two categories, the lighter is verbal violence, that is, showing violent tendencies in speech, and frequently saying "kill you" and so on. Another example is that in daily life, some children were playing and suddenly screamed, frightening the people around them to tremble, but if he himself had nothing to do, such words and deeds are also typical manifestations of children's language violence. The other more serious type is manifested in children's actions, ranging from hand and foot to the use of violent equipment to injure people, which is extremely harmful and leaves hidden dangers for children's future development.
Child violenceFor the performance
1. In kindergarten like to beat, kick and push.
2. Biting people randomly. I'm upset with my parents, I'm arguing with the children, I like to bite someone with my mouth open, and then look at each other provocatively with open eyes.
3. Pet abuse. Small animals are lively and lovely, with attractive posture. In general, children like small animals. But some children are not like this. They take cruelty to small animals for fun. They like to chase or kill small animals, and feel relieved when they hear the cry of small animals, or see the scene of small animals dying and struggling.
4. Suddenly become angry or fall into a thunder without any warning, and be angry or restless all day long.
The cause of violence in young children
1. Attract attention. Some children have a strong desire to express themselves. When they are not noticed, they like to make small "violent" actions to attract others' attention, such as hitting other children, grabbing mother's hair, bullying A little pet and so on.
2. Imitate adult behavior. Children’s psychology actually thinks of a lot of things. It is the golden stage of imitation at the age of 3 to 6. Sometimes the violent behavior of children is sometimes derived from imitation. Don’t think that the violent behavior around the child has no effect on the ignorant child. Keep the child in a violent environment. Over time, violent psychology will develop. Psychology is the cause of the behavior. So novice parents must pay attention to the environment in which the child lives. .
3. Family disharmony. There are a small number of parents who behave uncivilized themselves. Both parties love to quarrel, even fight, and throw things. Over time, their children imitate their parents. Before the age of 6, children mainly use the closest person in the family as the target of imitation. If there is a violent conflict between parents, or if there is a problem with the child in the parent’s education method, often uses violence to solve it, rather than being reasonable. , The child will learn to use violence to solve problems.
4. Make up for the lack of language. Some children may not be very good at language expression. When they are "attacked" by other children, they cannot use words to "fight back", so they adopt some violent behaviors to defend themselves.
5. The requirements cannot be met. In many cases, parents are responsive to their children. When they suddenly cannot meet their children's requirements, some children lose their temper and even show some violent actions.
How to eliminate violence in young children
No. 1: Encourage
young children to want to attract the attention of others, this is a child to show their desire to express themselves, want to be recognized by others, this is a good phenomenon, parents must be guided. You should always be more concerned about and communicate with your children, always pay attention to your children's thoughts, and don't be absent-minded when communicating with your children. Sometimes one of your eyes may cast a shadow on the children's heart. Encourage your children in a timely manner. Your applause and cheering are actually very important to your child’s healthy growth! Z2z
No. 2: Teach
not to let your children watch some "violent movies". The child has not distinguished right from wrong. Ability, his understanding of the world started from imitation. Help young children choose some healthy cartoons to watch. Mom and Dad can accompany them to watch cartoons while telling him, let him distinguish between good people and bad people, why are good people, and why are they bad. Tell the child what behavior is good and what is bad.
Third trick: Cultivate
children's language skills when they are not good, parents must not be ignored. A good language atmosphere is the key to a child's ability to improve language expression. Moms and dads should use gentle and gentle language to communicate with their children, and try to provide him with opportunities for language expression and defense. Encourage children to express their thoughts, wishes and needs in words, encourage them to express their thoughts and feelings freely, and let them experience the effect and fun of expression in words.
No. 4: Guide
not to be used to children. In many cases, parents' overspoiling their children is the cause of the children's violent behavior when their demands are not met. Today’s children are all only children, so many parents’ love for their children has become a kind of unprincipled spoiling, and many parents blindly accommodating their children’s excessive behavior. This is undesirable and should be based on different The situation guides the child. For some of the child’s not excessive requirements, you can chooseChoose to divert attention to make the child lose interest in the request just now. And some principled problems, blindly satisfying the child’s psychology, will only increase the child’s squeamishness, and let the child know clearly what is right or wrong. Spoiling the child unprincipled will only adversely affect the child’s growth.
No. 5 Trick: Role model
In the family, parents should not quarrel in front of their children and never fight. Mom and Dad should set a good example for their children and be good children's role models. The child’s growth environment has a very critical influence on the child. To keep the child away from violence, we must start from ourselves and use practical actions to inspire the child’s heart. When educating children, let them correctly understand the importance of interpersonal relationships and how to solve problems. Educate children to be polite. When confronted with conflicts, first check whether they have made mistakes. Never let children use their fists to resolve conflicts.
