Why do we have children? The most meaningful answer I have seen recently is that for our generation, having children is not to pass on the family line or raise children to prevent old age, but to give and appreciate. We do not seek to be perfect, nor to fight for my face. We just want him to grow up healthily and ask me to have the opportunity to walk with him for a while.
I became pregnant three months after marriage. I was full of hope that I could get a baby to have an accident. Because I had a yin supernatural injury that night, I didn’t care. The doctor’s attitude was not good that day. I said something I would never forget in my life. Don’t look at whether you have to hold on for three months and get a file. However, the checklist shows that everything is very good.
My mother called me to ask about my condition. I said my stomach was not very comfortable and asked me to go to the hospital to see if I didn't listen. I felt that it should be fine after three months. But the reality is that I was only three months away from 7 days. My husband called my parents as soon as possible and accompanied me to the hospital. My father also rushed to the hospital from the unit. After the ultrasound, the doctor told me that the child was gone and I had to be hospitalized, but the bed was not enough, so I needed to be hospitalized the next day. My husband and my parents kept persuading me to go to another hospital for surgery, but I wanted to spend more time with the child. My father's wet eyes at the entrance of the hospital comforted me. I felt like I had lost my soul at that time. I hated my husband and I hated this child even more. I said I would leave.
That night, my mother accompanied me without sleeping all night. My mother secretly cried, and the little guy in my body slowly pulled away. We had each other and said goodbye at that moment. After the operation, I secretly swear that the child would say a few years later! Maybe I am not a very mature person yet and I can’t afford to be a mother.
25 one day, I was urged to give birth and started thinking about this question, why do I have to have a baby, am I ready? Until I saw this passage, why do you have to have a child? One day in your thirties or forties, you will suddenly realize that the best things in your life have happened, and the rest is just a repetitive aging. Every year, your child will create and repeat it, and make life unknown again. He wants you to worry, make you worry, make you happy, make you surprised, make you experience a childhood, and also make you understand the mood of your parents back then, give you reason to buy toys you once wanted, make you strong in pain, calm in crisis, and let you see yourself recalling yourself in childhood.
This passage requires me to think for a long time without thinking. Maybe it’s been two years since I really let it go. I should have taken it away from that story. My husband also started to discuss with me. He didn’t force me to tell me that if you think I can be a father in the child, you are ready to welcome the baby again. Just tell me not to put such great pressure on myself. When I got pregnant in 2019, the little guy returned to me. Suddenly I felt that the appearance of a life requires me to experience the interweaving of difficulties and happiness between pregnancy and raising.
Now my baby is almost three years old. He wants me to be furious sometimes, sometimes he wants me to be surprised. At that moment, it seems that when I was young, I realized the difficulty of my mother, slowly adapt to this new identity, understand and accept the current self, we raised our children, and the children also accompanied us, and we made each other successful, because in the passing time, she is the only one who makes the future look forward to.
The current social pressure is great, and there are many problems that need to be faced with a child. I believe that only by being a parent can you understand how much bitterness and effort you have. This is a long journey between happiness and exhaustion.
I don’t know what everyone thinks is the meaning of having a child.
I am Fat Lu, I am writing about my own experiences and what I see and hear, and accompany you with words. Thank you for your love, I will continue to work hard.
