The rebellious period is a very difficult problem that every parent will encounter. How to get through this period? What should we parents do?
First look at the disobedient behavior of children of all ages
1. The child talks back at the age of three, and the mother said, let’s do this? He doesn't, mom let him eat that? He doesn't want it.
2. What will children in the third and fourth grade say? This is unfair.
When a child is young, parents are a little useful in using tough methods, such as coercion and inducement, beating and scolding him. Although the child is stubborn, he can still do it and move a little.
3. Adolescent children, lock the door directly, and they will tell you, "Whatever you say is right, go out." If you find that your child plays with your mobile phone and you fall down, your child will run away from home.
Looking at the problem from a different perspective, rebellion is actually a symbol of growth.
He began to express it with "no", which is a big improvement. It is terrible that your child still listens to you and asks you everything when he is in his 20s.
It is wrong to ask the child to be obedient. Why should he listen to you?
If you make him obedient, the subtext behind it is: I am right, I am for your own good, you have to listen to me, what you did is wrong, I don’t believe you are right, I don’t believe that you want to do well, I don’t believe that you can do well, you have to listen to me.
Parents do not trust your children, and their children will not trust you. Why are you right?
The child has worked hard, but he can't do it. The harder he works, the more tragic he feels, and he feels he can't do it. Distrust your parents and not confident in yourself. Lying flat, stooping, insomnia, lack of energy, not interested in anything, it has no meaning.
The purpose of making children obedient is not to control or suppress them, but to let children develop good qualities, habits, and character .
If you want your child to be obedient, you must let the child try and make the child try and make the child fall in touch with more .
The original method of the parent is wrong. He has to listen to it. he must realize that this matter is necessary and is good to him before he can do . No matter how you present facts and reason with him, it is useless. He has to step on many pits that he should step on. He has to step on all the pits that we were young when we were young. If you tell him not to step on the pit, he will not be able to hit the wall by himself. Only by having experienced it can it be done.
You want your child to have the habit of dictating and reading in the morning. The child feels that the teacher has dictated all the time in class. If he writes again, he will have no time to play.
The process of trial and error should be recorded by parents.
Record all the things he did in a day, the homework required by the teacher, see how he wrote it,
The teacher dictates, he can't write many words, let him try and make mistakes.
Parents’ attitude towards mistakes is very important.
The wrong way is to take advantage of the situation and gloat. The parent meeting said, how about it? Look at how many of you were wrong this time? Don't you say it anymore? Don't you know it anymore? Is this what you will look like? I told you to practice every day and dictate every day, but you don’t listen.
Children will not accept humbly because your sarcasm will refute you
Every time you try and make mistakes, it is an excellent opportunity to reflect. First empathize, then reflect on !
Just like him, lose loss, regret, dissatisfaction, sadness, empathize with him, be sincere, experience these depressed emotions with him from the bottom of his heart, and see bad results, he felt unbelievable, shocked, and he felt that he did a good job in normal times.
The highest evaluation of children about their parents is that their parents understand me.
After empathy, the child felt that his mother understood me, and he felt the warmth. His broken heart was praised by him, and his low mood was comforted
took him to reflect
Parents should guide him and ask him, what were they wrong? Every time we make a mistake or fail, it is an opportunity for us to reflect and grow. We will accompany you together, analyze and solve problems together. The child feels the power, he is not fighting alone.
What should I pay attention to when reflecting
The child has finally gotten up, don’t worry, take it slowly, don’t add more. For example, some parents, if the child finally does it, the parents will take advantage of the victory. If he refuses, you will start to sarcasm again. Then all the previous preparations are wasted. The child also thinks that the parents have a deep routine and will not listen next time. He will think, you have to control me again
to make the child have self-confidence, and let the child discover and analyze and solve problems by himself. Some children are fast, while some children are slow, and they have their own rhythm.
The development of habits is not painful. When something needs to consume its willpower, it is not easy for him to persist, slow means fast .
Parents should be patient and accept their children’s repeated mistakes. Parents will also have repeated repetitions. It is normal for parents to have a peaceful and positive attitude.
Many parents think that failure is not possible and cannot accept it, which is wrong.
The child looks a bit slow for the time being. In the short term, the child’s grades and performance are lagging behind. Your path is clear and you just need to know what you are doing. After the child’s cognition, behavior and habits are cultivated, he will have the confidence to not give up when encountering difficulties. The further he goes, the faster the child’s growth curve. If other people's children cannot keep up, your children will make a lot of money.
This is the content of Peking University Guixian Xueba Classroom Live Broadcast.
