Generally, children can sleep in separate beds after 5 weeks, but one of the problems is that children are "afraid of the dark". If children cannot handle the problem of "afraid of the dark" improperly, the children will go further and further on this road.
If you want to help your child solve the problem of fear of the dark, we must first understand the reasons why the child is afraid of the dark.
Reasons for children to be afraid of darkness
It is normal for children to be afraid of darkness. In a survey of children aged 4-12, it was found that 73.3% of children have the phenomenon of "fear of darkness".
These children who are afraid of darkness are concentrated in the age of 2-6 years old. Children at this stage have a preliminary understanding of the world, and they have rich imagination, so they are easily afraid of darkness.
But there is a reason why children are afraid of the dark.
First of all, it is the role of the spiritual psychology.
Pan-spirit psychology was proposed by Swedish famous psychologist Piaget . He believes that children are in the previous calculation stage about 18 months to five or six weeks, and they cannot distinguish the life attributes of objects. They will think that in the dark space, the stationary tables, chairs and furniture are alive and will "attack" them.
So, even if parents repeatedly emphasize that there is nothing in the room, children will still be afraid, which is the cause of the general mentality.
Children hear a little bit of turbulence in the darkness. They will develop rich associations, be sure that there is a monster approaching him and wanting to hurt him, so they are afraid of the darkness.
Secondly, children will confuse reality and imagination.
Generally, children aged 3-5 have the main source of fear and fear, and their imagination. They have no way to distinguish between reality and imagination. The rich imagination will make the vague things they see in the dark extremely terrifying.
For a while, my niece was particularly afraid of the dark. At night, when I walk on the street, I have to hold my sister's hand and I am definitely not the first to enter the house. When I go to drink water before going to bed, I must be with me, and I dare not go to the bathroom alone.
Later, I heard my sister say that she was suddenly afraid of the dark because my sister pulled her to watch a horror movie.
She firmly believes that the plot on TV will definitely happen in life. Once she is in a dark space, those terrifying shots in her mind will appear, making her feel scared.
And there is also parents' intimidation.
Some children are very brave and fearless, but parents are scared of their children in order to educate them.
My 6-year-old nephew is particularly afraid of the darkness. Even in the dark environment during the day, he will be afraid, and the culprit of his fear of the darkness is his parents.
When the little nephew is disobedient, they will scare him: "If you are disobedient, let the big bad wolf capture you."
For so many years, the so-called "big bad wolf" did not capture the big nephew, but silently took away his courage, turning him into a child who was afraid of the dark.
When a child says "afraid of the dark", the parents' attitude of response is very important.
Identify the child’s feelings
As the people children trust the most, when the child speaks to us “afraid of the dark”, we should not question it, but agree with the child’s feelings; do not blame the child for being timid, and do not label the child as a “coward”.
Children are afraid of the darkness. If parents say that their children are "cowards", on the one hand, they will deny the children, and on the other hand, they will make the children believe that there are really monsters in the darkness.
We need to identify with children’s fears and understand their feelings. You can try to share your childhood experiences of fear, so that your child can understand that it is normal to be afraid of the dark, and there is no need to worry too much.
The acceptance and recognition of parents is very important for eliminating children's fear.
I once mentioned to my daughter the experience of being afraid when I was a child. When I was a child, my parents often went to work evening shifts. They were woken up by thunder in the middle of the night. They had to go to the factory to find their parents with flashlights. As a result, they were so scared that they couldn't lock the door, so the neighbors helped me. On the way to the factory, the weeds were shaking. I still remember the feeling that "the grass and trees are all ghosts."
My daughter laughed loudly after hearing this, thinking that it was not a shame for her to be afraid of the dark.
Take children more to play adventure games
Protect children in moderation. Sometimes, it is also a kind of exercise for children to face difficulties and dangers more often.
mobilizes children's thinking and judgments, and cultivates and strengthens children's courage. In this way, children will know how to protect themselves, have the courage in their hearts, and will overcome the fear of darkness.
Facing the child who is "afraid of the dark", we just need to hold him, accompany him, and tell him: "Don't be afraid, I'm here", and slowly help him find out what he is afraid of, so that the child can stay away from being afraid of the dark and become more and more brave on the road to growth.
