article｜Ningma Wuyu
Dong Yuhui talked about his experience of understanding his mother, which made many parents envious.
Dong Yuhui was once a non-mainstream boy. He often couldn't get along with his mother. He could even quarrel with a few words, which would make his mother cry. My mother is impatient and sometimes she will pick up a stick to chase her and try to beat her. Therefore, Dong Yuhui always intends to escape from his mother.
When I was about to enter the second year of high school, Dong Yuhui accidentally fell from a high place and broke his leg. He broke comminuted fracture and was unable to move and was forced to recover from his injuries at home.
In order to help him recover faster, my mother stewed pork ribs stewed every day. The wound slowly healed, and my mother stewed pork ribs in different ways. In the very hot kitchen, my mother spent the afternoon. Blanch the ribs in water, wrap the seasonings in gauze, cook and fry first to create a sweet and sour texture.
In the hot summer, my mother repeats these steps tirelessly every day, and also carries out heavy and trivial labor. He didn't scold him for anything wrong, nor would he urge him to complete his studies, and he was wholeheartedly just wanted him to recover as soon as possible.
From then on, Dong Yuhui suddenly realized and understood his parents.
Dong Yuhui felt his selfless love for him because he saw his mother's hard work and realized his mother's selfless love for him, so he understood her from the bottom of his heart. It seems that as long as the mother is good to the child, the child will understand his parents. In fact, he is not so optimistic.
Many parents said: I am also very good to my children, why can’t my children understand me like Dong Yuhui?
seems to be the child’s fault, but it is not necessarily the case. Children should have many conditions to understand their parents. Not every child has the same experience, nor will they all be in the second year of high school.
Children's understanding of parents is lagging
The relationship between children and parents can be roughly divided into three stages, Attached to parents - Exclusion of parents - Understanding parents.
before 0, she is very attached to her parents and wants to share everything with her parents. When she encounters problems, she will ask her parents for help. Children are like parents' followers and will never grow up.
html After the age of 110, enters adolescence and has a strong sense of self-awareness. If parents control too much, they start to stay away from their parents, and even go against their parents, entering a stage where they dislike each other. Many children want to live in school and go to school outside the country. The further away they are from their parents, the better.
After a few years, the time is uncertain. Maybe it is high school, maybe it is adult, or maybe it is after marriage. Only by experiencing some things by yourself can you realize the difficulty of your parents, start to reconcile with your parents, and want to get close to your parents.
Many friends said that after living in high school, they realized how happy they are at home and how good their parents are to themselves. Some friends also said that after having children, I realized the hardships of raising children, and then I realized how difficult it was for parents to raise themselves, and I hope to compensate for my debts to my parents through hard work.
Children’s understanding of parents is a tortuous process, or it may be a long process. The sun cannot go straight, it takes 8 minutes to shine on the earth, and it is unlikely that our children will be able to smooth sailing.
There are differences in the love between parents for their children
We think it is good for children, but this kind of goodness requires quotes . Is it too much that makes children accustomed to not being grateful? Is it imposed on the child, making the child at a loss, and instead being suppressed to breathe?
Many children have been spoiled since childhood, and have a superior life, so they can do whatever they want. He never knew that all this was obtained by his parents' hard work, so he deserved to accept it. When he reaches a certain age, he naturally will not understand his parents. There are many cases like
, such as this scene happened on the streets of Jilin. A female student beat her mother in the street. After being dissuaded, she was still dissatisfied. Even if she fell to the ground, she still supported the ground with her left hand and pointed at her mother with her right hand and cursed.
The reason is that the girl wants a lot of money to go out to play. The mother is worried that the child will lose money or be in danger, so she doesn't want to give it to her. The girl doesn't understand her mother's behavior, so she robs her wallet when she comes up. She doesn't get it and starts to take revenge on her mother.
There are also many parents who love their children too much, and they always give their children too much care under the banner of being good for you, which leads them to become enemies. This is because it goes against the child’s psychological needs and the child cannot understand it.
has a psychological effect, called the "salt effect". An donkey . It felt boring when eating dry grass. One day, the owner added a little salt to him. It felt delicious and ate a lot. It thinks salt is delicious, so it requires salt. The next day, the owner gave him a bowl of salt, and the donkey took a few bites and ran to eat grass.
If parents are too good to their children, it is like adding more salt to the donkey. The children will not feel comfortable when they eat it, but will instead make them hate because of love.
Let children understand their parents, and they need patience and wisdom
Every parent hopes that their children can understand themselves. In fact, it is not an easy thing, and this requires patience and wisdom.
Don’t compare with others, every child is different. Other children may have always understood their parents, or they have understood their parents when they are in high school. Although their children of the same age, they cannot do that well. It doesn’t matter, the child is still on the way to understand his parents. After experiencing more twists and turns, children may have a deeper understanding of their parents.
Never be disappointed with your child, the child just is not prepared. A mother said that her child is particularly rebellious when she goes to junior high school. Parent-child relationships are tense, and the family is full of gunpowder. I don’t want to see the child anymore, and I don’t want to give a good look when I see the child. This will push the child to the opposite side, and the contradiction will only become deeper and deeper.
Adolescence is a rebellious stage and requires more understanding and help from parents. If you insist on giving your child a smile every day, I believe that the child will melt into the smile and slowly eliminate the vigilance of his parents.
Love children, don’t be arrogant or overdo it. The child is very malleable. He will become the kind of person he gives him from childhood. The life you live will let your children live in the same way as they live without making it special. Let children know from an early age that everything is hard to come by and cherish every porridge and meal. When a child should be independent, let him make his decisions independently and make him feel competent.
gives children the simplest love, , such as , , carefully prepares every meal, which seems ordinary, but this silent love impresses the children. Like Dong Yuhui, he always recalls the scene of his mother cooking for him, and the beauty overflows the screen. There is also Jesse. He remembered that his mother always asked him to drink porridge. He once blamed his mother, but when he grew up, he missed the smell of childhood.
is exactly what Little Prince said, why is rose unique? It only seems unique because you have spent a lot of time on him.
at the end: At a certain stage of the child's growth, we will especially hope that the child will understand his parents, but things often go against his wishes. Don’t worry, as long as we love our children with our hearts and leave beautiful memories for them, the children will always wake up.
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