text: plum
pic source network
The weather is cool, the autumn wind is blowing, and it is September's school season again, and my daughter is going to go to college. We are busy preparing various objects for our children and making a list of things, regardless of the details, for fear of missing something. But I knew that there were two days left to study, and the child actually said to us: "I'll go and report by myself, don't accompany me!" This made my father and I unexpectedly stunned.
The child’s father agreed to go and give her to her, and the tickets were bought in advance, but he received the latest notice from the school that due to objective reasons such as the epidemic, parents cannot enter the campus and send them to the school gate. My daughter felt that giving her is not meaningful, so she insisted on going alone.
school season, escorting children to college is a natural thing in the eyes of many parents. Sending children to college is not only a physical job, but also a ritual, witness and protection. Going to college is the first time a child who is not well-versed in the world. Parents are always worried. They have to carry their luggage, deliver it to their destination in person, see the school environment with their own eyes, complete various procedures, and place everything in place, and feel that they have fulfilled their responsibilities.
"Chinese Partner " Stills
Once upon a time, in those years before the epidemic, parents who traveled thousands of miles to send their children to college were a beautiful scenery in the crowded university campus. It can always attract the attention of the media and easily make headlines. Some are "sentiary groups from all over the world", which are vast and spectacular for generations of old and young. It is not known that it is to send children to school, but it is actually a family tour. Some of them are "deep love like the Shanghai School". In order to spend more time with their children at close range, they are unwilling to stay in hotels, so they just slept on the floor in the school gymnasium, playground, and canteen, which makes people feel touched and sad. There are also "no matter how big or small", who helps children lay their beds and quilts, clean the dormitory, and get closer to their children's roommates. They even want to redecorate the dormitory so that their children can live comfortably and find the feeling of home.
In addition to various factions such as "the whole family is dispatched" and "there are no small matters", of course, there are also "single-handed factions" like my daughter, who live in a team alone and do everything by themselves. It looks very independent and cool, but when you think about it, you always feel a little lonely and miserable. Thinking of this, my father and I decided to do our best to try to convince my daughter to let her go and send her.
But my daughter is very determined and insists on not giving it to her. The reasons are as follows: Dad has to report to his unit before leaving, and he has to be quarantined at home when he comes back, which is too troublesome. The round trip ticket costs more than 700 yuan, so it would be better to save it for her to use it elsewhere. bed sheets bedding and other daily necessities have been ordered in advance at school. There is not much luggage, only a large trolley case. I won’t get lost. I have already trained in three years of high school, not to mention that I have mobile navigation now. Seeing our worry and loss, she said calmly that her classmates still took a plane to report alone, so don’t worry about it.
Stills of "Beijing Women's Picture Book"
Seeing that the child was so persistent, the child's father had to return the ticket and followed her. But I was worried and entrusted a relative who worked there to pick up the station.
After experiencing the longest summer vacation of his student days, and the occasional unpleasant friction between us caused by being together day and night, the daughter of a prospective college student should be the person who sincerely hopes for the start of school. There is not much melancholy and sadness of parting, and I am determined to see the outside world. It’s interesting. The first time the children went to school, they all lay on the windowsill of the kindergarten crying, "Don’t leave." When I was going to college, I just focused on the longing for life after flying out of the house, and forgot to look back to see if my parents were crying.
It takes five or six hours from departure to arrival. After getting off the high-speed rail, you have to take the subway again. The road ahead is long, the mountains are high and the rivers are far away, the rivers and lakes are dangerous, and people are complicated. I have given me some precautions to think of and then I have emphasized it again. In my daughter's opinion, it is unnecessary and a bit ridiculous. She also moved out Zhu Ziqing's words in "Back View" comfort me: I am so adult, can't I take care of myself?
" Pentium Era " Stills
The baby's father sent his little cotton jacket to the high-speed rail station, returned home in a daze, sat on the sofa for a long time, and did not say a word. My son is worried about his mother who is traveling thousands of miles away. This is true. Since my daughter left home, that morning, my father and I seemed to have a cell phone in our hands, and we were restless, always paying attention to the child's dynamics. Whenever we sent any message, we immediately replied. The child said that he had settled down and was right by the window, so he could see the scenery. The hearts we kept holding were slightly lowered.
This is the first time my 18-year-old daughter goes out alone to travel far. Everything is fresh. Children who grow up on the plains rarely see mountains. The children photographed countless mountains along the way, including earthen mountains, stone mountains, green mountains, big mountains, and small mountains. They don’t live in admiration for why the mountains are so beautiful. I also saw Yangtze for the first time. The pictures I have seen countless times in the textbook have been put into practice for the first time. Because of the novelty, I reported to us at any time which stop I had and didn’t feel too bored along the way.
Six hours later, my daughter arrived at the school and sent us a message of safety and the feeling of walking alone: it went smoothly, but it was too tired, my luggage was too heavy, and my hands were almost exhausted. While feeling distressed and relieved, my father and I finally completely let go of our hearts that had been hanging.
" Twenty Not Confused " Stills
Relatives and friends heard that we let our children go to a university 1,000 kilometers away to register alone. In addition, we did not accompany the high school entrance examination in the past, and we did not accompany the college entrance examination, so we all said that we were really big.
Are we really big? Although there is no time to accompany you, at the critical juncture of your child's growth, there are not many tortures and worries that should be endured at all. , however, many times, you have to let go. After entering university, the role of children is changing, and they will slowly become "social people" who welcome the ups and downs of life alone. Parents should also start to change, listen to their children's opinions more, and don't take care of everything.
Agree with what an education expert said, the first task of love is to stay intimate with children and protect children's growth; the second task is to separate from children and promote children's independence. A mother and son is the deepest fate in life, and deep affection only becomes real as it gradually fades away. If the mother turns the order in the opposite direction, she is doing something anti-natural, which not only makes the child poor in childhood, but also makes the child feel suffocated for adult life.
Stills of "The End of the Road"
Eighteen-year-old daughter flew to a wider world on the high-speed rail, opening a new stage of life. Back then, I was twenty years old and took the green train to go far away alone.
Train once made me extremely fascinated by my childhood. I just saw the train in a literacy textbook. It was ridiculous and pitiful. It was only when I was nearly twenty years old that I went out to college. I took the train for the first time. In the eyes of our country children, people who take the train have stories. Taking the train often means being knowledgeable, and the train represents a mysterious and vast distance.
How grand and distant the distance is, not only the distant place of geographical significance, but also the meaning of ideals, the passion and desire of adolescence, and embodies our longing and imagination for the future. A train that leaves the secular world does not seem to be heading for a physical world, but towards some kind of openness and sacredness. The distance exists as the opposite or opposite of reality, and desires and dreams must be realized in the distance. The planes were too luxurious and far away for me at that time, and the rails were the only way to them.
" I don't want to be friends with you " Stills
I long to leave my hometown and set foot on the train to the distance to chase my dreams. But at the same time, I suffer from "station panic disorder".I have never gone out alone. I heard that the bizarre stories of cars at the train station made me full of fear and imagination about the train station. The impression that the train station left me was not romance, but was dispersed, unpredictable, accidental and panic...
0 years old. Because my parents were busy with farm work, I left home and went out alone to go to college for the first time. Looking at the dilapidated and crowded station, the people waiting for the train in groups of three or three in the square in front of the station, sitting or standing, or sleeping on the ground, my heart wrinkled. The sound of the train's whistle came from afar, and the sound was shrill and long, making people full of the melancholy of parting. The waiting room was as dirty and noisy as a vegetable market, and the smell in the toilet was extremely strong. The voices of people of all kinds of people gathered into huge sounds, buzzing, and the waiting hall was like a huge hive. Someone was sitting on a snakeskin bag that was about to be broken, holding a huge plastic cup in his hand, looking confused - "train" only symbolizes romance when it is a written word.
At that time, there was no online ticket purchase, and passengers would often queue in front of the ticket gate half an hour or even one hour in advance. Most people queued up with their eyes, rarely looking at other places, and only stared at the train schedule in front of them. Once the sound of "K-Some train starts checking tickets" sounded on the radio, the entire team immediately became turbulent, and the sitting people immediately got up and were ready to go. Their eyes immediately changed, from being confused and exhausted to being urgent, eager and eager.
Stills of "Lost in Thailand"
The railway station back then was extremely simple, with a gate blocking passengers, several platforms were laid inside, and different trains were parked. Ticket checking is done manually, and you can use scissors to cut a void on the ticket. Some people even put their tickets or ID cards in their mouths to reduce the time for ticket checking. As soon as the small iron door for ticket checking opened, it was like a flood gate. People rushed forward, pushing and shoving forward.
At that time, there were no electronic display signs on the platform. Passengers had to run around on the platform first when they entered the station. After finding the train number, they started sprinting for a hundred meters. People carry their hands on their shoulders, help the elderly and the young, anxious and anxious, like escaping famine and taking refuge, rushing to the car door desperately, all of them panting and sweating profusely, which is really a "rush" to the train. This experience of catching the train has left me with sequelae. Even if I can buy tickets online now and can accurately know the time in advance when waiting, I have to sit in the waiting room half an hour in advance to feel at ease.
During the period before getting on the bus, from physical to mental health, there was no place to relax, and was on standby at any time. So when can I relax?
"Siteng " Stills
, etc. successfully found your position, sat in the seat, properly placed your bags of luggage, filled the kettle with hot water, and leaned against the back of the chair after coming back, closed your eyes, shook your sleeves, and then touched your pocket. After all this was done, he was unconsciously freeing his eyes from his fatigue so that he could look at the world outside the car window with peace of mind.
I looked out the window and the train drove through the bright and prosperous journey, and also through the dilapidated and desolate. In late autumn, there are winding paths in the fields, a pond with scattered lotus, a lamb slowly gnawing on the soil slope, a raised grave in the fields, a small village lying under the setting sun in autumn, and a cluster of dark red tassels of sorghum on the green poles, which made me feel wandering when I left home for the first time. The carriage of
green car is like a kaleidoscope, reflecting the various aspects of the world: shirtless young men gather together, swaying poker hard; men drink beer, blushing and joking loudly; occasionally they will meet those who sing in the carriage, singing in a silly manner, and everyone either close their eyes and pretends to sleep or pay them for it, not out of appreciation of "art", but hope that they will take the money and leave quickly and take a nap; there are also those who sell all kinds of cheap little tricks, who are as singing as if they are talking on stand-up crosstalk.
" Later Us " Stills
It can be said that the green train itself is a space for creating stories. It is different from the high-speed rail. The seats on the high-speed rail face forward and the seats next to each other are inconsistent, and there is almost no story to happen. Green leather cars have seats opposite, with a short trip ranging from a few hours to a few days. Face to face, and it is always a bit embarrassing if you don’t say anything. With the words, the story begins. Most chats on the train are idle stories, spending time, having a speculative conversation, and even exchanging business cards or phone numbers.
At that time, the green train speed was so anxious that it was slow. People kept passing by, going to the toilet and urinating, and picking up boiled water to soak the bucket noodles. This is my first time traveling far away. I always remember my parents' advice. I am full of vigilance and vigilance. I do not talk to strangers, eat things handed over by others, and dare not go to the bathroom to ensure that my luggage will not leave my sight.
But I like to listen to other people’s chats. The carriage was filled with voices of the south and the north, and people talked about international situations, social experiences, current affairs, and family matters. The nasal cavity is filled with various complex and unspeakable smells, and people take off their shoes, drink, eat snacks, and make instant noodles. Looking at the men, women, old people and children around me, I always wonder who they are, where they are, and what kind of life story they have. In short, they are all people who support their families, those who rush to make a living, and those who ride green trains like me. I have seen the vast world and the various aspects of the world. I have been staying under my parents' wings and truly experienced the taste of life and touched the true texture of life.
With the first experience of riding the train alone, I gradually overcame the fear of going out alone and began to become familiar with it, independent and confident. Since that time, I have been on the road more and more alone, and the power to control my destiny has emerged in my heart.
Take the train alone to the distance. It is a feat for me who is introverted and timid, and it is more like a ritual: from that moment on, I feel that I really go to my own path. Every time I go on the road, I have enhanced my grasp of the world. The extremely sensitive girl has a self-protection shell due to the friction between the wheels and the rails. I know that the external world is not that terrible, and my own power is not as weak as I imagined. This force supports me from a girl to becoming a mother until I can face the difficulties of life with a smile.
Time flies, and now my daughter has also started her college life. Since then, we have paid more attention to weather forecasts. A few days after my daughter left, her father and I were a little weightless and lost, and we were discomfort like "empty nest syndrome". My daughter and I were all interested in watching the flowers and plants on campus, cats and dogs, three meals a day, and daily class day. In the scene where the military training video flashed by, dozens of students wearing exactly the same camouflage uniforms, the child's father actually saw his daughter at a glance.
Stills of "Ten Miles of Spring Breeze"
In the WeChat group of only three of us, we both competed to teach her life experience, from interpersonal relationships to academic planning, from time management to guaranteeing the postgraduate entrance examination. Sometimes I forward some inspirational chicken soup articles to her. If my daughter is willing to reply, she will reply a meaningful emoticon package. If she doesn't want to reply, she will pretend not to see it. Perhaps in her opinion, there is no saint in her family's eyes, so what qualifications do we mothers and mothers have to pretend to be her life mentor?
The road of life, she has to walk alone. No matter it is wide, flat or bumpy, the road under your feet can only feel the most real if you walk through it yourself. Let’s go, let’s go, life is bound to experience pain and struggle, people always have to learn to grow up by themselves.
