"Because my dad is not at home, if my dad is at home, the ghosts dare not come, because my dad is very powerful, he will protect us and drive the ghosts away!"
After hearing this, I held her hand and comforted her: "There are no ghosts in the world. If you are still afraid, just hold your mother's hand."
My daughter grabbed my hand and continued to go wherever I go.
wait for us to clean up. After telling the bedtime story, when turning off the lights and going to bed, my daughter hugged me tightly: "Mom, I'm afraid of the darkness, I'm afraid of ghosts crawling in through the window."
While I comforted my daughter, don't be afraid of fear. Don't quickly turn on the light in the cloakroom to let the light there penetrate, which will not affect sleep, and can relieve my daughter's fear.
My daughter was still tossing and turning in the bed: "Mom, I can't sleep, I'm afraid of ghosts coming out of the bathroom."
I remembered that I once watched a video that comforted children not to be afraid of ghosts, so I learned and used it now.
I told my daughter: "There is no ghost in the bathroom. If you don't believe it, just shout: 'Ghost, please help me turn on the bathroom light'. See if the light in the bathroom will light up."
My daughter shrank in my arms and said, "Mom, shout."
I cleared my throat and shouted, "Ghost, please help me turn on the bathroom light."
After hearing me, my daughter poked her head out to see if the light was on. After waiting for a while, she didn't see the light on, so she got back into my arms, and there was no movement for a long time.
Mom recalled the past when she was afraid of "ghosts" when she was a child
I thought my daughter fell asleep peacefully now, but when I was about to fall asleep, she said slowly: "Mom, I feel that ghosts are coming out from under the bed."
I was also shocked instantly. After all, I am also a woman. Before I became a mother, I was also a weak woman who would be afraid of all kinds of demons and monsters.
I hugged my daughter tightly and pretended to be calm. A picture flashed through my mind:
It was a dark and windy night. My parents went to help because something happened to my relatives at home, so they left my brother and I at home.
At that time, I was about 7 years old. We rented a house on a three-story house, and our family lived on the third floor.
None of the other tenants were at home that night.
At least I have a companion, and my brother and I were doing our homework seriously at the beginning.
"Cruffy" Suddenly, the door of one of our rooms made a strange sound. My brother and I were so scared that we were shocked. My brother said, "Can't there be a ghost here?"
I started to play the story of the Strange Stories from a Chinese Studio in my mind with horror eyes.
At that time, "Strange Stories from a Chinese Studio" was on the air. We once followed our friends at night, deliberately turning off the lights and watching. Then, when the "Woooooo" sound appeared, we squeezed behind the door together, covering our eyes with our hands and not daring to look, and then we exposed a gap in our hands and took a sneak glance.
is really scared and happy!
I was so scared by the plot I had made up for. I held my breath and only paid attention to the creaking sound of the door. I seemed to be scared, and I seemed to be expecting something to appear behind the door - it was like the feeling when I was watching Strange Stories from a Chinese Studio.
After a long time, the voice stopped. I grabbed a book called " Xinhua Dictionary ". My brother held his toy pistol, and we ran around and quickly turned on all the lights on the third floor.
Then quickly returned to our bedroom, closed the door, and blocked my brother's 4WD car and my elephant doll at the door - deceiving himself, thinking that these things can help us scare away the "ghosts".
After setting up the "longmen formation" for a while, we began to relax and thought that we would wait for our parents to come back.
But they are reluctant to return, and we are already sleepy and want to sleep.
planned to go to take a cough and sleep, but suddenly remembered that the public bathroom was on the second floor. There are no lights on the stairs from
3 to 2nd floor.
Just think about not washing the cough, but my brother wanted to pee.
This is going to be "forced to Liangshan".
Finally, I plucked up my courage and set out on the "long road" of "escorting" my brother to the bathroom on the second floor.
At that time, I was holding a flashlight and a pencil case, my brother held a toy pistol and a four-wheel drive car, shouting together, "Ghost, I'm not afraid of you!" He rushed to the second floor, and after he solved the problem of peeing and coughing, he ran back to the bedroom with a yell.
We were still in shock and did not forget to put the things on our hands that could scare the "ghosts" back to the door.
Later we fell asleep in a daze.
After waking up, the sun shone through the window, dispelling the darkness and dispelling our fear last night.
When we opened the door and prepared to go downstairs to take a shower, we found that the things we placed at the door were there, except for my brother's toy pistol.
After confirming with my parents that they had not taken the pistol, we felt a chill again - we wouldn't have the "ghost" of last night took away the toy pistol while I was asleep, right?
Finally, the plot reverses.
When we went to the second floor to wash, we found the toy pistol lying quietly on the sink. We remembered that when we went to the toilet yesterday, my brother put it on it and forgot to take it back to the bedroom in panic.
Mother used what she learned to help her daughter get out of her fear of "ghosts"
Recalling this, I remembered that when I went to the family education teacher training class, the teacher said the "individual experience communication method", so I had an idea and said to my daughter:
"When my mother was so young, no, when she was 2 years older than you now, she was also very afraid. Ghost. At that time, both your mother and your uncle were afraid of 'ghosts'."
The daughter became curious in an instant: "Are my uncle afraid of 'ghosts' even if he is a boy?"
Me: "Yes, your uncle was timid at that time, after all, they were all children. But when my uncle and I were afraid of 'ghosts', we would take what we thought was amazing The toy was placed at the door of the room and scared the 'ghost' away."
's daughter then asked, "Was dad afraid of 'ghost' when he was a child?"
I said seriously: "Dad was afraid of 'ghost' when he was as young as you, and he was not only afraid of 'ghost' but also snakes. Mom was also afraid of 'ghost' when she was a child, but now she is still afraid of height when she grows up. Do you still remember the last time we went to the high-altitude glass bridge to play, Mom Mom was so scared that she dared not walk over, but you dared to run and jump on it. "
My daughter started to laugh, "Mom is so old, she is still afraid of being tall. I am so young, I am not afraid of it."
Then I took advantage of the victory and shared with her a few things that I was afraid of when I was a child. My daughter gradually relaxed and soon she heard her even breathing sound.
mentioned the "individual experience communication method", so what is the individual experience communication method?
Individual experience communication method
Individual experience communication method refers to using individual experience to further communicate with children, that is, parents talk about their experience from the individual level and share it with their children as a possibility.
Of course, sharing your own experience also requires skills.
It’s like a daughter is afraid of “ghosts”. If I say directly, “Mom has never seen “ghosts” even though she has grown up, so there are no “ghosts” in this world, don’t be afraid.”
This is to impose your own experience on the child. The child will think that you have not seen “ghosts”, which does not mean that “ghosts” do not exist!
We should not directly tell our children about the experience we have summarized, but should share the process we have experienced with our children.
A sentence "When mothers were young, they were also afraid of 'ghosts'.'' will instantly narrow the distance between us and children, and there is no trace of preaching.
When parents tell their children their experiences, it is best to go from an individual perspective, "My personal experience is like this, it may not necessarily apply to you" rather than "The correct experience must be true. That's it."
I'll share the communication skills I learned in the family education instructor training class using individual experience:
Seeing you now, I felt like I was back when I was a child. I found that we really look like it because I was like you now.
I was also afraid when I was a child ( ), I used to ( ) Have done this.
Of course, we should not think that by communicating with children like this, we can completely eliminate children's fear of "ghost". This fear, like joy, anger, sorrow and happiness, will accompany us throughout our lives.
We only need to know how to accept children's fear and help children digest this emotion again and again. After all, people as old as we are also afraid of "ghosts", right?
We want to let children know that true courage is not not not afraid, but that they are obviously afraid in their hearts, but still working hard.
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