In reality, some children have extremely weak psychological defenses and are as fragile as egg shells and glass bottles. They are called "glass hearts".
These children usually have the following symptoms:
- First, they are particularly concerned about what others think of themselves;
- Second, after being criticized and accused, they will lose their temper and become depressed;
- Third, when facing setbacks, they often rely on He cannot solve the problem independently without help from his parents and others.
- ...
What are the reasons that cause children to become sensitive, have low self-esteem and have a glassy heart?
I think parents may have to look for the reason within themselves. In our educational practice, we have found that once some children fail to meet their parents' requirements, they will be suppressed by their parents in words and actions. These experiences when they were young made them always think that they were inferior to others, which caused them to be insecure and afraid to try new things easily. Since then, I have become less confident and even have low self-esteem.
So, how should we solve this problem? In fact, we can start by cultivating children’s dominant thinking.
The so-called advantages thinking is to allow children to discover their own advantages, gain confidence and grow from their advantages.
If parents want to help their children develop dominant thinking, they need to focus on the following four aspects.
First, try to avoid letting your children do things they are not good at
Many parents have a misunderstanding. They think that letting their children do things they are not good at can exercise their abilities and courage. However, the actual result is not like this. Not only does it not work It exercises the child's ability and courage, but also makes the child feel frustrated.
When children deliberately refuse, many parents will subconsciously think that they are timid and worthless, but they do not know that at this time, they should help their children develop their strengths and avoid their weaknesses.
This is like asking a child with no athletic talent to compete with sports experts on the sports field. No matter how hard he works, it will be difficult to achieve success. At this time, you must learn to adjust in time and find things that you are better at. Otherwise, if the child keeps doing things that he is not good at, he will continue to suffer setbacks and blows.
Therefore, when parents find that their children are not good at doing something, they should use their strengths and avoid weaknesses, help the child find his points of interest, develop hobbies, let him do what he really wants to do, and cultivate his self-confidence, so that he Only in this way can you become more outstanding in the field in which you are good.
Second, parents should not use their own will to kidnap their children
Every child is an independent individual, and parents should not impose their own ideas on their children. If a child makes a choice that is different from what our parents want, all we have to do is respect his wishes and not make life decisions for our children without a good discussion with them. This gives children a certain right of free choice, which is conducive to promoting the formation of their independent personality.
Third, let children understand that everyone has weaknesses and shortcomings, and they must learn to accept their own imperfections.
Everyone has their own shortcomings and weaknesses. Parents should guide their children to learn to accept their own imperfections calmly.
Parents can use their own experiences to tell their children that weaknesses and shortcomings are common phenomena. Everyone has more or less shortcomings and weaknesses. This requires correcting your mentality and learning to face yourself, so that you can become a better version of yourself.
If you find that your children are feeling uneasy because they are not doing well enough, parents need to comfort their children and help them relieve their mental pressure.
Fourth, parents should be good at discovering their children's strengths and helping them develop them.
First, stimulate children's interests.
Parents can take their children to participate in various types of activities from an early age. If the child does not show obvious interest or has no special talent, parents should not be too anxious. They should give the child more time and opportunities to experience and observe more. Performance.
The second is to help children develop their own interests.
If the child determines the direction he likes, parents can help the child understand this field more deeply. At this time, the parent can find a professional teacher for the child, give more guidance and encouragement to the child, so that he can be more focused and not give up easily. .
The third is to focus on cultivating children's comprehensive abilities.
In addition to guiding their children to focus on their own strengths, parents must also balance other aspects, including learning ability, interpersonal skills, etc. These basic abilities are all complementary to each other.
An excellent parent often consciously explores the strengths and shining points of his children. Children's potential is unlimited. Parents should develop an eye that is good at discovering their children's strengths and specialties, and cultivate them in a targeted manner so that their children's potential can be fully utilized.
Conclusion
The discovery of children's advantages mainly depends on the positive influence of parents. If parents proactively discover their children's strengths and specialties and guide them correctly, then the children's potential will be stimulated.
A child who has "advantages" that others do not have will definitely be a person with a strong heart. I hope every child can stay away from the "glass heart" and become an excellent child who is calm and confident in everyone's eyes!
