1. hilarious classic funny joke when working, class, a stingy child, who was usually very stingy, handed me a ham. I was very happy because he had never given any snacks from children and almost ate them secretly. I was secretly happy, but I had a lot of weight in his heart. I hurriedly said in a warm and sugary voice: Teacher, don’t eat it, you eat it, be good! He said calmly: Bite me open...
2. Search and follow Tiantianyixiaoxiao.com to see more jokes. One day, several roommates were having dinner in the cafeteria, and the TV in the hall was playing Qinggong drama. After the meal was finished, I wanted to wipe my mouth, but I found that there was no paper, so I asked my roommate, who had paper? As soon as he finished speaking, a long and soft eunuch sounded on the TV: "The Emperor has an order."
3. Chat with embarrassing jokes. Two old men chat. The first old man said: "This person should laugh often. People who don't laugh are too serious are bitter melon faces." The second old man said: "But when you smile, you are like bitter melon faces. When you smile, you have folds on your face, just like the lines when you look at the bitter melon."
4. My son interpreted "two sides and three knives" as "two bags of noodles and three knives", which made me laugh and cry. I told my son, "Two-faced and three-faced means a metaphor for bad intentions, one in front of me, one behind me, not what you think." My son smiled at me and said, "Dad, I understand, you are so good at facing her in front of my mother, and you always say bad things about her behind my back. This is two-faced and three-faced and three-faced!"
5. In class today, the girl sitting in front of me was discovered by the teacher because she was playing with her mobile phone, and was scolded by the teacher while standing. As I was scolding, I said, "If you continue like this, how can you make money in the future? Can you support yourself? Ah?" I was angry at that time, stood up and slapped the table, and shouted, "I'll support it!!!" Suddenly, the class was silent. The girl turned her head and looked at me, and threw her phone heavily to the ground.
6. I am very reluctant to take the initiative to knock on others' hearts, for one is afraid that there is no one inside, and for the other is afraid that the people inside pretend not to be there. Opportunities are always left to those who are prepared: so I always bring a spoon on my body so that no one suddenly asks me to eat ice cream. Give me a bed and I can sleep until the world perishes.
7. Man: Let’s go check in. Female: What are you doing when you open a room? Male: The hotel’s WIFI signal is great, and it’s so exciting to play games! When I was a child, my biggest enemy was ‘other people’s children’. When I grew up and got married, I finally thought I could be relieved! Who knew that another stronger enemy appeared: someone else’s husband! ! !
8. In the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period, you were the best in charge, with a pot lid on your head, a sack on your head, a plastic bag on your waist, an egg yolk pie in your hands, and two cabbages on your feet. You claimed to be the unbeaten of the East. When you charged, you shouted: "Who has a rotten bottle and a rotten can and sold it!"