Last Friday, I felt very depressed when I got home from get off work. My daughter asked me what was wrong.
I said, I am still because of your father. Did you hear your father swearing in the morning? I haven't been out of a bad mood for a day!
She said, I heard it, don’t be the same as him. I said, I don’t want to either, I just can’t get over that hurdle in my heart.
I closed the bedroom door and my nephew was cooking dinner outside, so I said a few words to my daughter to make myself happy. Now that my daughter is older, she can sometimes understand how it feels to be a mother.
Let me tell you in good conscience, apart from your father's bad temper and bad moral character, he also had a very difficult life.
Therefore, I also suffered a lot for him, and I do shed tears when I think about it. What to do with
? Your father and I were originally poor and had no one to rely on. We worked hard in society on our own and it was normal to suffer some grievances. But when we think about some grievances now, we shed tears when we think about them.
The daughter said, I know, just think of your father as a tool to make money. Now the family cannot do without him, and his brother is still so young.
Yes. I can only comfort myself like this! But the human heart is made of flesh. After more than 20 years with my father, I still have some feelings for him!
I told my daughter one thing. I also want to use this matter to let my daughter cherish today. It is not easy for parents, and I don’t want to complain to anyone anymore.
It was 2003, and my daughter was only one year old. My husband and I were working in a unit in the local county, a machinery manufacturing factory. I do some simple inspection work, and my husband works as a quality inspector in another workshop.
That year, the company purchased several machining centers, and there were two places to go to Shanghai to study machining centers. My husband was a college graduate and majored in CNC, so we all thought the company would send him there. In the end, two young men who were close to the factory director were sent.
My husband was very unhappy when he found out. He went to the office and asked the leader to give him a chance to study at his own expense. Maybe it was the husband's sincerity that impressed the leader, and later the leader replaced someone and arranged for him to go.
has been studying for more than half a month, and my husband and the others are back. After studying, my husband was directly assigned to operate the machining center.
was able to operate this kind of equipment at that time, and he still programmed it himself. He was still quite technical, so it was natural for him to become someone else's master.
A few months passed like this. One day, I was working in the workshop here, and my husband suddenly found me and said angrily, I quit! Let's go home!
I asked nervously: Why?
Our whole family relied on this salary to survive. At that time, we had nothing and the house was rented. We could hardly afford milk powder for our children because the factory often did not pay wages for several months in a row. Despite this, we still cherish this job.
He said dejectedly: The monitor confiscated the key to my machining center!
I asked why it was confiscated?
’s husband told me the reason, probably because he talked back to the monitor a few times. When my husband was young, he never tolerated anger. He was very aloof and had a stubborn temper.
I knew it as soon as I heard it. Without even thinking about it, I rushed upstairs and entered the general manager's office. Without saying a word, I knelt down in front of the general manager with a "plop"!
I said, please ask the general manager to return the key to XXX (my husband’s name). If he is wrong, I will ask him to apologize to the monitor. I hope the work tools will not be confiscated! The general manager of
saw me kneeling like a girl, so he quickly helped me up, then settled the matter very simply, and the key was quickly returned to my husband.
Thinking about it now, I don’t know where the courage came from at that time. If I were to do it now, I would definitely not do this. I would not be able to lose face, and I would not have that much motivation to kneel down to the leader!
But there was no other way at that time. Apart from being young and having nothing, I had to eat and survive. Apart from face being worthless, I could rush to do everything else.For me,
is also a very useless performance! Because we have always been weak!
I always thought that every time my husband suffered a loss or was wronged at work, it was because others were bullying us, or others had misunderstandings about my husband. Not entirely.
In the subsequent work, my husband never turned over. Although he later left that company, left the county, and worked together in a new company for more than ten years, it was not that he had no opportunities for promotion during these more than ten years, but there were many opportunities, but he failed to seize them once. After the leaders and surrounding colleagues gradually understood my husband's temperament, they unanimously believed that his personality, emotional intelligence, etc. were not suitable for leadership.
In the past ten years of working together, I feel deeply! Because of the friction between him and this colleague or that leader, I kept wiping his butt, excusing him, and getting out of trouble. I was exhausted both physically and mentally.
watched his later colleagues rise to prominence one by one, and he himself felt depressed because his grades were always mediocre! The mentality collapsed again and again, and the confidence was lost again and again. Bad mood even affects normal life at home.
I can no longer understand his thoughts. His almost paranoid thoughts have made him immersed in puzzling all day long.
Later, I persuaded him to leave here and re-plan and position himself.
Now, I have been working hard for more than 20 years, and no matter how passionate and ambitious I am, it should be extinguished.
’s husband has been working in the new company for more than three years in a blink of an eye. The new company is very small and everyone has a clear division of labor. He really has nothing to fight for and he still obeys the leadership’s arrangements, but there are not so many intrigues and complicated interpersonal relationships.
works part-time during the day and works part-time at night. His inner enthusiasm has been defeated by the embarrassment of reality. Time has also filled up his upward desire and infatuation. Apart from making money to support his family, he has no other thoughts.
The only thing that has changed is that the pressure of life has shattered his heart to pieces, crushing his temperament to the point of being extremely anxious and furious.
Speaking of this, my daughter did not speak, and I myself fell into silence. I said, you go out and cook with your brother. It might be better for mom to be alone for a while.
The daughter closed the door and went out. When I looked up, I found that the lights outside the window were dim. Thinking of the days when I lived in the county without a fixed place, and the quarrels between the two of them over trivial matters along the way, I couldn't help but burst into tears!
I think, no matter how irritable or swearing he is, I should adjust my mentality and be more calm. After all, the two of them have gone through so much and still come through.
Now that I have children, a house, and a car, all these difficult times have passed. If I am so miserable in the future, can I afford to live the rest of my life? !
Thinking of this, I wiped my tears and seemed a little relieved...
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