Xiaoya is a beautiful girl born in 1995.
has shiny white skin and gentle black eyes that smile slightly most of the time.
She fell in love at the beginning of this year.
Her romantic partner is six years older than her and has a gentle manner.
Both of them are engaged in publicity work in their respective units, and they often meet. They go back and forth, from discussing manuscripts to exchanging life experiences. The other party's conversation is humorous. The atmosphere of the two chats quickly turns to vague ambiguity, and then they quietly hold hands. Xiaoya quickly falls into this relationship.
The man is divorced and has a child. Now his son is five years old, and his parents help him take care of him.
If it was an introduction, a married man would definitely not be in Xiaoya's consideration range, but first she had a relationship, and she planned to persuade her parents to slowly accept it.
Just when Xiaoya was fully committed and wanted to announce her relationship with the other party, he became distant.
first belittled himself, saying that he didn't want to embarrass her, and that it was a waste for her to spend her great youth with a second-hand man like him.
Xiaoya replied to him with a long WeChat message. From her sincerity towards love to how she didn’t mind other people’s opinions, it was basically, I love what I love from my heart.
The man seemed moved and asked her if she had really thought about it?
Then, gave her his salary. : He said that although he had a house and a car in this third-tier city, his quality of life seemed to be acceptable, but in fact, all he got was dead wages and no surplus.
Xiaoya does not doubt this. When the two of them go out to eat together, Xiaoya pays for most of them.
So, Xiaoya said very seriously, if you have money, spend more, if you don’t have money, spend less, if you are sentimental, drink enough water.
The man said, "You are young, beautiful and unmarried. How can I be with you?" I feel stressed.
He proposed that the two of them not meet each other for a few days and let him think about it carefully.
Until this moment, Xiaoya still thought that he was suffering from inferiority complex and wanted to cure him with warm warmth.
After three days of calmness, the man directly sent a breakup message: " Although it is painful, I still decided to let you go. You deserve someone better."
Then, the circle of friends was invisible.
Xiaoya was a little confused. Wasn't she a young, beautiful and unmarried girl at the beginning? Didn't you deserve someone better before you fell in love with him? How can you say forget it?
During that time, Xiaoya often woke up suddenly from her dreams, wondering whether her breakup was a dream or whether she was in a dream that ended in a love affair.
She recalled over and over again what the two of them had said, done, and visited together. Those memories were like an endlessly rotating roulette, waiting to pull her thoughts in and spin together at any time.
During that time, she was like a sunflower whose head was bent by hail. Everyone could see that she was wilting and asked her what was wrong.
He acted as if nothing had ever happened. When they met for work, he greeted her politely like the most ordinary colleague.
At that moment, her self-doubt reached its peak, and she especially wanted to know where she was not good enough. When she called for consultation, it had been six months since she was broken up, but she still couldn't get over it.
It’s not that she is bad, it’s that she met a “fake scumbag”.
Nowadays, many girls have met such men who are single or divorced and "don't dare to take responsibility and don't want to take responsibility." I name them "pseudo-scumbags."
Why are we called “pseudo” scumbags
“Scumbags” usually refer to those men who are attracted to women, treat their feelings as a game, and hug them from left to right.
Although the kind Xiaoya encountered did not have the original intention of being "scumbag" and were not real scumbags, they may have caused more harm to girls due to their weak hearts.
After all, once girls understand the true nature of a "scumbag", they will understand that being a "scumbag" is not their own problem.However, "pseudo-scumbag men" often cause girls to have long-term self-doubt. They feel defeated, their self-confidence is hit, and they even dare not fall in love easily.
Breaking up for a reason can lead to lessons learned. A relationship that ends in vain only results in hurt.
The weakness of the "pseudo scumbag" is reflected in two aspects.
First of all, I started easily without thinking clearly.
Men like this are not mentally prepared to be involved in a relationship before revealing their attraction to the opposite sex.
If a desirable person of the opposite sex appears and touches a certain heartstring of his, he will be very good at expressing himself: polite and attentive, just like the "Jiang Taigong" who takes the bait. If the girl is tempted, then he will feel very good. If the girl is not tempted, they have nothing to lose.
What they like best is the ambiguous fermentation stage. They will use vague care and deliberately created tenderness to make the girl sink deeper. However, these cares and tenderness are generally not paid in real money.
When girls take the initiative to express love, they will not refuse; if girls do not take the initiative, they rarely express love, allowing the ambiguity to last longer.
They didn't plan to be serious about this relationship at first, so they didn't think about the future.
The second sign of their weakness is their lack of courage to face the truth.
When the relationship has gone through the flowering season and needs results, their hearts will instantly become weak, and all real problems will emerge at once.
Please pay attention to the word "instinct". It is because of these two words that I added the word "fake" before "scumbag".
They may be naturally weak, they may have been well protected during their growth stages, they may have experienced some emotional hurt, or they may just not be ready. In short, they want to back off once a clear commitment is needed.
then began to find some decent reasons and excuses, just like Xiaoya's ex-boyfriend.
It must be said that in this era, there are more and more "fake scumbags".
is a little lonely and empty, so he starts easily; he doesn't dare to take responsibility and doesn't want to be responsible, so he "runs away".
So, if you meet this kind of man, please don't try to warm him with love. What he lacks is not love, but strength.
Please remember that there are quite a few such "pseudo-scumbags" nowadays. If you break up, don't doubt your cuteness and don't deny your charm. It's not that you are not good enough, it's just that he doesn't dare to love.
The story is true and the name is fictitious.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-