Borrow gift has always been a hot topic in marriage and love. Because there are opposing cubes, it is difficult to unify thoughts.
Because of the dowry, it is not uncommon for real cases where a relationship ends. In a certain way, there are many such questions.
A girl said that she had broken up with her partner. Her monthly salary is 6,000 yuan, and her father is not in good health, so she can only ensure her basic life; her monthly salary is more than 7,000 yuan, her parents are healthy, and she has five sisters at home.
The two are junior high school classmates, and they are both from rural families and are relatively not wealthy.
The boy's family said that the dowry was 12,000 yuan, and the girl's father said that the wedding dowry was basically 60,000 yuan, so the girl asked her to discuss that 40,000 or 50,000 yuan was acceptable.
The girl told the man’s mother that the bride price was 48,000 yuan. The man's mother first agreed, but at night, she asked the boy to tell the girl that his family could pay up to 28,000 yuan.
First, the family spends a lot of money on buying a house and holding a wedding, and second, they all have bride gifts at prices of 12,000, 28,000, or 36,000 yuan, and there is no more. After several rounds and turns, the girl finally compromised and agreed to 28,000.
But the wedding still couldn't continue because the girl accidentally saw the chat history between the boy and her cousin. My cousin asked: What if she insisted on a 48,000 yuan betrothal gift? The boy replied: It’s not that she must be.
The girl chose to let go. Because she knew clearly that boys can take out the money at home, but they were not worth it in their hearts.
Many people think that the woman wants a bride price to "sell her daughter", but after all, she has raised a daughter for more than 20 years. In terms of money and hard work, who can be willing to "take action" for 50,000 or 60,000 yuan?
Of course, the bride price we are talking about here is not the kind of high-priced bride price that is unconscience-free, but a kind of blessing passed down from ancient times.
There is a mother who explained to her daughter whether to ask for a bride price:
Children are the hearts of parents, so parents must hope that their children can be happy. Marriage is different from love after all. The importance of money in love is not that obvious. Love can be tried and wrong, but marriage cannot.
To get a bride gift, there are only two issues to implement:
First: The bride gift can be not much, but there must be . This represents the degree of recognition of you in the family you will enter and your status in future marriage.
The essence of the bride price is, whether you are willing to admit it or not, it is an "evaluation" of the woman's value. It is a valuation given by the man's family after comprehensively combining various factors such as the woman's appearance, personal ability, and the strength of the mother's family.
If you ask for a reasonable number, but they think it is high or don’t want to give it (first to rule out that the other party really can’t afford it), it is mostly because they are not very satisfied with the woman and feel it is not worth it.
Men will also calculate whether their efforts are proportional to their gains. If the answer they get is no, they will not give.
Second: If a family wants stability, its economic foundation cannot be ignored. Borrowing gifts and dowry are the start-up capital of a new family and can also be used as a reserve for the woman to have children in the future.
As the saying goes, if you have food in your hands, you are not panicked. This is the reason. Originally, young people are in a running-in period when they get married. If the relationship and life are empty and even owed a lot of debts, it will definitely affect the relationship between the two.
Poor and humble couples are sad. What often defeats two people in life is not the fact that they no longer love each other, but the actual pressure of life and objective reasons that cannot be changed.
In general, only two people who have a foundation in money and are not distracted in marriage can become more intimate and longer.
Tu Lei Teacher Tu Lei There are two kinds of men in this world. One is that they don’t like their women to take the initiative to talk to themselves about money. As long as they talk about money, they feel that the other party’s material things, and then complain that there are too many material worshippers in society now. When their women say no, they will think that this is what they should be and for granted;
The second is that they like to take the initiative to talk to their women about money. He will think that I marry a wife, and the dowry, house, and car are all things he should prepare. When a woman understands, he will be grateful and will be more considerate of women."
For the former type of men, they are undoubtedly a delicate egoist. It is difficult for a marriage to be happy with such a man. Because from the beginning to the end, they only consider their own feelings. There is a phenomenon in
, I wonder if you have noticed it. The woman doesn’t want a bride price or asks for a very low price. The in-laws say that you are sensible, but when it comes to actual actions, they look down on them.
They don’t think the woman is so reasonable, but instead think that the woman is not worth it and she doesn’t dare to ask for it because she has no confidence. Or I just think that my son is capable and can get back a wife without spending money.
. For the second type of men, it is hard to come by. If the men in the world were all this type, women would probably not be so eager to use brides as a measure of marriage and money as a favor.
As Xibao said, if I can’t want love, I have to ask for a lot of money.
-END-
The world is so big, thank you, you can see me!
[Written|Weiwei'an: The pen has warmth and speaks for emotion. An atypical writer who loves words invites you to perceive life together]
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