If you want to control your husband, you must first understand what the man is thinking.
There is a saying you may have heard, that men are teenagers until death, right? This sentence is true. A man is still a child when he is 80 years old. What are the characteristics of a child? I am fragile inside, playful, afraid of trouble, and not so easy to deal with various life problems, right?
so if you understand this, it is really not difficult to control men. How to deal with it? I will teach you three tricks.
The first trick, when he is "ideal mother"
What is "ideal mother"? Just don’t care about his food, clothing, housing and transportation. His mother is already taking care of these things. No matter how good you do, you can’t compare to his mother. Then what to do?
Tao Hong said before, that is, the most important function of being a mother is to provide children with a sense of security. So you just need to give him enough sense of security emotionally.
In fact, most men lack love during their growth. If you have a little understanding of the growth process of men, you will know that men have been educated since childhood to become the pillar of the family, and be successful and fame, and cannot cry or be weak.
So for men, their real mothers take care of them in life, but they ignore them emotionally. They also long for someone to care whether they are happy or not, whether they feel wronged or not, whether they feel safe enough.
So if you want to control a man, you have to attack your heart. If you hope that your husband will rely on you and never leave you, you will give her a sense of security and stability emotionally.
He failed and was depressed. Can he talk to you and gain strength from you, instead of asking him every day if he is full? Are you wearing warm clothes?
The second move is to catch the big and let the small.
As mentioned earlier, men are afraid of trouble, so if you want to pay more attention to them, you must learn to fish for big fish on a long line.
What is catching a big fish with a long line? To put it simply, you must be able to grasp the big and let go of the small and do both kindness and power.
In ordinary small matters, give him enough freedom, don’t talk, nag or complain, let him do whatever he wants, such as playing games, going out with his brothers, etc. Don’t exaggerate it, it’s not a big deal, you can let him go.
really, the more you hinder him from doing something, the more annoyed you. Originally, he just wanted to go out to drink some wine, but if you don’t let him go, he would think you were annoyed, and maybe after drinking, he would go out to sing a k.
So remember one sentence, just use it on the edge, give him freedom in small things, and once it touches the principles and bottom line, you must set good rules with him and never tolerate them.
Never set rules and slap yourself in the face. Remember, women who are too soft-hearted cannot control men. Men are not afraid of you because they are too soft-hearted. Do you understand? If you want to control a man, the best way is to learn to do both kindness and power.
The last third move is better to keep the man alone than to take care of him.
is that you need to understand that the underlying logic of all relationships is value exchange. When you are not worth enough, no matter how you try to care about it, it is useless. Those who should leave you will eventually leave you.
. Only when you are excellent enough and have your own resources, even if you let this man care, he will never mess around outside, because betraying you will have to pay a huge price.
So don’t care too much about whether a man loves or not, and don’t always worry about whether he will become bad. You just need to remember one point, love that goes against biological instinct does not exist.
Instead of trying to control a man, you might as well invest in yourself, because only when you are in the best state, then he will be unable to live without you because he wants to take advantage of you.Do you understand?
Psychological test: Test the words your ex wants to say to you most
1. Do you quarrel over trivial matters when you are together?
Yes, I often feel very tired —2
rarely argues over trivial matters —2
Occasionally, but I can make up soon —3
2. Do you think you are a person who likes to reflect on yourself and is willing to correct your mistakes?
is —3
is not —4
3. Will TA take the initiative to tell you about your troubles?
often says - 5
doesn't say much - 4
4. Will you tell your parents about the process of your love?
, and often complain to my parents. —6
, occasionally, they will talk about it when they ask. —5
, hardly say it, there is nothing to say —5
, there is nothing to say —5
5. How much energy are you willing to spend to get what you want?
Everything goes with the flow, it’s mine after all, it’s mine —7
Work hard, maybe you can succeed —6
Try your best, I have to get everything I want —B
6. Is it because a third party appeared?
Yes—A
No—7
7. Has the other party contacted you actively after breaking up?
Yes—D
No—Ch
