Zengzi said: There are three types of filial piety: great filial piety is to respect relatives, and secondly, it is not humiliating, and the lower part can be raised.
What disappoints many parents now is that their children cannot even be able to raise their parents because they are respected and ensure that their parents are not insulted.
It is natural for you to raise me and raise you for old age. However, many children demand that their parents sacrifice everything for themselves, and often condemn their original family, feeling that they have not reborn as a good birth. On the one hand, they refuse to support their parents on the grounds that they are busy with work and their other half are not doing it, which leads to many tragedies.
However, this cannot be completely blamed for children. In many cases, it is not because the children are unfilial, but because the parents are unqualified.
As there is a saying in "Yan Family Instructions": Those who are blessed with the weather are from the top to the bottom, and those who are first to the bottom. Therefore, if a father is not kind, the son is unfilial; if a brother is not friendly, the younger brother is disrespectful; if a husband is not righteous, the wife will be unhappy.
For example, many people believe that the word "school" in raising children to prevent old age refers simply to sons. They believe that their daughter will get married sooner or later, and are from other people's families and are unreliable at all. They regard raising children to prevent old age as the most reasonable reason for favoring boys over girls. They treat their daughter unfairly and treat their daughter unfairly.
When they get old, when those biased elderly people are not filial to their sons, they are reluctant to blame their beloved sons, so they throw the blame on their daughter-in-law, believing that it is the daughter-in-law who is sowed and disagreeing and not letting their sons respect themselves. Some people are reluctant to let their sons work hard to support themselves, so they pass on the responsibility of retirement to their daughters on the grounds of giving birth.
Many people advise mother-in-law to treat their daughter-in-law kindly, believing that they have to rely on their daughter-in-law when they get old, while many people think that no matter how good they treat their daughter-in-law, it is useless. After all, they are not biological and are not reliable than their daughters.
After getting old, is it a daughter-in-law reliable or a daughter? I asked three old men and they used their personal experience to explain the answer.
first place, take a bowl of water equally, be a good mother-in-law, and your daughter-in-law and daughter are reliable;
"Sister, my mother is hospitalized, I discussed with my wife. We are busy with work, and we really can't take leave. You have retired and your daughter is married. See if you can come back and take care of me?"
"No problem, I'll come back now. With me here, you two can go to work with peace of mind. Let's go to work with us. Let's share the medical expenses of my mother equally."
"No, sister, don't pay money, do your best to accompany your mother, and we pay the money."
Hearing that my son and daughter competed on the phone, one asked to pay the money himself, and the other had to bear half of the money, Aunt Xu smiled with relief.
That night, Aunt Xu's daughter came back, responsible for taking care of her mother, seeking medical treatment, taking care of Aunt Xu, and helping Aunt Xu to go to the bathroom. When the National Day approaches, the son and daughter-in-law come and ask their sister to go home to rest for a few days. They come to take care of Aunt Xu.
"My daughter is so filial because I am a good mother. When she was admitted to college, she failed the first time. She was unwilling to do so and wanted to repeat the school. The relatives felt that she was not satisfied. She said that no matter how good a girl was studying, it was useless. She was a waste of money. She should go to work early and could subsidize her family. I scolded all the relatives who were talking about the gossip and firmly supported her daughter's study. What an outsider is not an outsider? She is my girl, the dear girl I gave birth to ten months of pregnancy."
My daughter's mother-in-law died early. After marriage, no one took care of her child. Aunt Xu also took care of her granddaughter for a while. Therefore, the son-in-law was also very grateful to Aunt Xu and fully supported her wife to be filial to her mother-in-law.
As for the daughter-in-law, Aunt Xu is also a good mother-in-law. She takes care of her grandson and takes care of her son and daughter-in-law. Aunt Xu treats her as if she hasn't heard of it. She never cares about the affairs between them and their wife and respects her daughter-in-law very much. Therefore, the daughter-in-law is also very filial.
"Who is more reliable or my daughter? I think the key point of this problem lies in how you do it. If you are a good mother, your daughter will not be unfilial to you.If you are a good mother-in-law and treat your daughter-in-law kindly, unless you are extremely lucky and have a daughter-in-law who doesn't know how to be grateful, your daughter-in-law will also be nice to you. Even if she is unreliable, your son will not ignore you. "
second place, preferring boys over girls, spoiled his son, and hoped that his daughter-in-law would be his son's free nanny, and his daughter was disgusted with me;
Compared to Aunt Xu, Aunt Cai is a partial mother. She has three children, two daughters and one son.
"This cannot be blamed for being partial. Everyone around me is like this. The son is his own family, and the daughter is an outsider. At least raising a son can pass on the family line. Isn't raising a daughter a waste of time? I really can't blame me. If I want to blame them, I blame them for being blind and they must be in my stomach when they are reincarnated. "
Even though she is lying on the hospital bed now, her son and daughter don't care about her, Aunt Cai still doesn't realize her mistake.
She treats her daughter as her son's money tree. In order to buy a house and a car for her son, she went to her two daughters' house and company for more than ten times. She personally ruined her eldest daughter's house, forced her second daughter to move away from her family, and cut off contact information from everyone.
She spoiled her son and responded to her son's request. In order to allow her son to live a life of having a shirt and reach out to eat and speak out, she wanted to train her daughter-in-law, so that her daughter-in-law can make money to support her family and take care of housework and serve her A good man's all-round paid nanny, but he didn't expect that his daughter-in-law was very powerful. Not only did he not let Aunt Cai manipulate him, but instead forced Aunt Cai's son to choose his wife and children and drive away his mother.
Now, Aunt Cai found a lawyer, not to sue his son and daughter-in-law, but to sue his two daughters, forcing them to support themselves and respect themselves. Seeing that Aunt Cai was obsessed with her, many people were too lazy to pay attention to her.
third place, holding the money firmly in her hands, for the sake of the money, whether her son, daughter-in-law or daughter, they have to respect me.
"Money can be bought with family affection, do you believe it? Although it is not filial piety from the bottom of my heart, at least I have taken care of myself and I will not worry about life in my later years. I am too lazy to care about so much. "
Uncle He is 72 years old this year. He has two sons and one daughter. He lives alone and is cared for by a nanny. Usually, his children often come to visit him and send food and drinks. When Uncle He is sick, they even quarrel in order to take care of Uncle He.
Many people envy Uncle He and think he is lucky, but Uncle He knows very well that the reason why his children are so filial is because of their own distribution plan for inheritance.
"My wife and I have worked hard for decades and bought two houses in a second-tier provincial capital. With the deposit, we have to have five million! After my wife passed away, my children asked me how to allocate. I told them that if I don’t distribute it before I lose my ability to take care of myself, I will give it to anyone who is the most filial to me. There will be no silly thing for me. "
Although Mr. He knows very well that his children are filial to themselves for money, he is so old and is more realistic. He only hopes that the rest of his life will be happy, and does not care whether he is sincere or not.
To summarize, which daughter-in-law or daughter is more reliable, the key is not them, but yourself. If you want daughter-in-law and daughter to be filial to your daughter, the key is how you are parents and how you are in-laws.
END.
Today's topic: Which daughter-in-law or daughter is more reliable? Welcome to share your views in the comment section.
