Introduction:
Many elderly people think that the most important thing they should rely on in their later years is their own children. After all, they are their own children, so they must be more reliable. If the elderly choose an indispensable item in their later years, most elderly people will choose their own children. In their hearts, children are their backers and their magic weapon for happiness in their later years. But in fact, elderly people who have really experienced some things have a new set of ideas about their later years' life.
You will fall on the mountain and everyone will run away. Only by relying on yourself is the most reliable. In your old age, you still have to hold some things firmly in your hands so that you will not be stolen and you can live more confidently in your later years.
Most elderly people are very doting on their offspring. Even if their financial conditions are average, if their children are in trouble and look at their children's worries, most elderly people will do whatever they want, and even leave no way out for themselves, hoping that their children can live a better life.
I thought my children would care about this kind of affection. When they were unable to move in their later years, their children would repay this kind of kindness well. But after they really got sick, the elderly suddenly realized that most of the elderly who rely on their children would return in disappointment. In their later years, only by keeping these three things can life be comfortable, and there is no need to look at people's faces.
78-year-old Mr. Wu’s self-report:
My name is Wu Fasheng, I am 78 years old this year. Speaking of which, I have lived a very sad life. My wife passed away when I was in my 50s. I haven’t found a suitable wife for so many years. Fortunately, I am a diligent person and my health is still strong, so I can still persist even if I live alone.
I have been planning to live in my hometown while I can run or jump. When I am in good health one day and need someone to take care of me, I will go to my son's house to take care of me. I have a son and a daughter, so I naturally don't need to worry about my daughter's marriage far away, so I can't rely on me, but my son is in the city, so he can't avoid the issue of giving me a care of me.
Actually, I live very happily in my hometown in the countryside. I am surrounded by familiar relatives and neighbors. When I am free, everyone chats and plays cards together. My life is enjoyable, and I don’t feel lonely either. My children are also very filial and come back to visit every festival. I think it's good to live like this, but the world is always full of surprises.
That night, I was so excited about chatting at my neighbor's house that I forgot about the time. When I came out, it was dark. It was a cold winter. Taking advantage of the moonlight and snow, I walked alone in a quiet small village. Unexpectedly, I fell down all of a sudden. This fell to my sciatic nerve , which led to a long time when I stayed in the hospital. I couldn't move every day and could only lie in the hospital.
My son often comes to take care of me. Although he is not 24 hours a day, I am very satisfied. After all, young people still have their own work to be busy, and I cannot be that kind of selfish old man. I am already very content when my son comes to accompany me to relax every day. I muttered to myself, such a filial son seems to have a future in his later years.
My daughter came back to visit her because she married far away. She was carrying a large bag of nutritional supplements. She looked at me with tears in her eyes. Women are always so sentimental and cry when they encounter small things. I lie on the hospital bed and want to comfort her. I am really tired, but seeing that both children are so filial, I feel really sweet in my heart.
After my son came to take care of me a few times, he felt that it was too troublesome to go back and forth, so he suggested that I go to his house to recuperate, so that it would be convenient for me to take care of me. At least there was no need to go back and forth. I could see me after get off work every day, which would save a lot of trouble.
I naturally have no objection to my son’s proposal. In fact, I always feel that if I raise them, they should take care of me in my later years. Now that I am sick, they must be responsible. I am not the kind of pretentious person. Since my children are kind, there is no need to pretend to be noble. After all, people have time to grow old, and they are in poor health when they are old. This is human nature, and there is nothing to be embarrassed about.
When I first arrived at my son's house, my life was really good. My grandson was in high school, so I didn't need to worry about it at all. My daughter-in-law did all the housework and three meals a day. My daily task was to eat and drink, watch TV when I was free, and then go to the park for a walk. This kind of life was simply too dreamy. Several times I thought it was a dream, and everything was really beautiful.
I thought this was my paradise for retirement, and my old age would definitely be enjoyable in the future, but I didn’t expect that after just one year, I encountered something that required me to make the right choice. If I made the wrong choice, my old age would only end up in miserable state. Fortunately, I finally kept my bottom line and did not lead to tragedy.
At the beginning, my son and daughter-in-law were very nice to me, but just a year later, they began to dislike me. It was either that I did nothing at home, or that I didn’t like to be clean. In the past, I didn’t have to do anything at home, but later I had to do everything.
The daughter-in-law pushed most of the work to me. I not only have to do laundry and cook, but also do housework. It’s okay for me to do it. The key is that my daughter-in-law also dislikes me for not doing it well. She thinks that I am old and do not pay attention to hygiene in cooking, so the food I make always smells like that, which makes her unable to swallow. She is not tactful at all, and just scolds me in front of my grandson and son, which makes me feel ashamed. She rolls her eyes at me every time, which is really heartbreaking.
I am old and always have the habit of getting up at night in my later years. When I first moved in, they didn't dislike me. They just started to pick on my thorns a year later. Although I tried to be as light as possible every time I woke up at night, my daughter-in-law's ears were too sensitive. Before I could reach the toilet, she opened the door and scolded me, saying that I deliberately disturbed them sleeping. She knew that they would go to work tomorrow, and said that I was a selfish old man. My daughter-in-law's words made me feel very frustrated. I have three urgent needs. I can't hold it in my arms and don't go to the bathroom, right?
Later I thought of a way, I bought a chamber pot so that I would not have to open the door to disturb their rest at night, but this problem was solved, and my daughter-in-law started to pick other problems again. She said that I snore at night was very loud, and they heard it in the next room, and said it affected their sleep.
I really can't solve this problem, and I can't control my snoring. I can't stop sleeping in order not to disturb them, right?
If it is just one or two things, I may think it is my problem, but if my daughter-in-law has many problems, I think it is my daughter-in-law who deliberately seeks faults. But I have no choice. In order to have someone to take care of her in her later years, I can only rely on others' breath. Even if someone is demoted to her uselessness, I cannot express my own opinions. Otherwise, if they drive me to their hometown in the countryside in anger, I really cannot take good care of myself.
It was not until my body became ill again that I finally understood their true face. My forbearance over the years did not touch them, but regarded my life as a mustard of grass.
This disease is actually not serious. The doctor said that as long as you have an operation, the tumor in your stomach will be cut off, and after recovery, it will be like a normal person. But if you keep dragging it and not undergoing the operation, it will be very serious and may even hurt your life.
I was so scared when I heard this. I pulled my son's sleeve and begged them to give me some money. I want to have surgery, but I don't want to die.
I believe no one is not afraid of death. At that time, I could beg my son with great dignity, and even tears were rising from the corners of my eyes, asking my son to help me raise some money. I thought my daughter-in-law was not good to me, but my son was a filial child, but I didn’t want my son to change his normal state and said, “Don’t ask me for money. What I lack most now is money. You can treat the disease, but this is not my responsibility alone. You must call my sister back and let’s discuss countermeasures together.”
My daughter said she could pay a part of the money, but the premise was that the son took the money first because she was afraid that her son would cheat.
But my son refused to give up and said he would give it to him together.
The two of them had a quarrel, and neither of them was willing to take the money first. Listening to their quarrel, I just felt sad.
They pushed the situation three times and four times, but in the end they all started to think about my house in my hometown and kept trying to convince me to sell the old house. This way the treatment fee would be enough, but I disagree. I understand the situation now. My children are unreliable. If I sell the house, they will not be willing to support me at that time. I don’t even have a place to stay. Selling a house is absolutely not OK.
Later, with my insistence, my children finally reluctantly raised some money. With some of my savings and pensions, the surgery fee was finally enough. Later, it reached the recovery stage. The daily expenses were more than 800 yuan. The children complained to me more than once, and even wanted me to give up rehabilitation training, but I refused. They are just thinking about themselves now and don’t think about me at all. They disliked me in the past. If I fell into the root of my illness, wouldn’t they disliked me even more?
After this serious illness, I finally understood that I must protect these three things in my later years:
, one, house. No matter how difficult it is, you cannot sell a place to settle down. This is to leave a way out for yourself. If your children are unfilial in the future, you can still go back to your hometown to live without even a place to shelter from the wind and rain. Therefore, you must guard your house.
2, deposit. When I lived at my son's house, he knew that I had a deposit. He used my grandson's study as an excuse to borrow money from me several times, but I refused. Now it seems that this is really a wise choice. Otherwise, I would have no money to treat him when I was sick this time, so I would have to wait to die.
3, pension. When I first arrived at my son's house, my daughter-in-law asked tentatively that since I was in their house, I wouldn't have to spend money on my usual expenses, so it would be better to keep the pension here for them to make it easier for them to buy things. Fortunately, I refused at that time. Now it seems that my choice is correct. They are not filial at all. If I give them the card, I may not even get it back.
Do you think Mr. Wu is a good or a bad thing to look at money so tightly? Welcome to leave comments.
