Conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a common problem in every family. After all, as long as they live under the same roof and have different outlooks and living habits, sooner or later there will be conflicts. However, some mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are good at withdrawing from each other. One step at a time, so as not to aggravate the conflict, but for those who like to stir up trouble, or have relatively strong personalities, they often quarrel over trivial matters. Christopher Meng once said in "Intimate Relationships": The closer you get, the closer you get. , the more problems arise, the power struggle gradually begins, and both mother-in-law and daughter-in-law want to be the hostess of the family. This is the power struggle between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
For women, getting married means integrating into a new family. If you can have a mother-in-law who knows right from wrong and knows how to care about you, you will undoubtedly be lucky, but if you meet a mother-in-law who likes to stir up trouble, Coupled with a gossipy sister-in-law, the woman's situation becomes even more difficult. She will be like an outsider in this family and it will be difficult to integrate into it.
Wang Yan’s marriage was like this. She and her husband were in a free relationship, but her mother-in-law looked down on her and felt that Wang Yan’s family background was not good and she could not help her son’s career, but her husband was determined. Wang Yan wanted to marry her, but her mother-in-law couldn't resist before she agreed. After entering into the marriage, in order to change her mother-in-law's impression, Wang Yan worked hard and kept the house in order. However, in her mother-in-law's view, it was her daughter-in-law who did these things. obligations.
As time went by, Wang Yan’s efforts were not taken seriously by her mother-in-law. In addition, her mother-in-law often criticized her, so that her sister-in-law did not know how to respect Wang Yan and directly regarded her as an outsider. Her mother-in-law often warned her daughter-in-law, Don't run to your parents' house when you have nothing to do, let alone do anything to support your parents' family. Wang Yan felt angry after talking too much. She was in a bad mood that day and had a few quarrels with her mother-in-law. Unexpectedly, the sister-in-law on the side not only refused to break up the fight, but also stood up At the mother-in-law's side, the mother and daughter were unanimous in talking to the outside world, and Wang Yan was demoted to nothing.
Later, Wang Yan decided to move out. She wanted to buy a house but didn't have enough money, so she had to ask her mother-in-law, but her mother-in-law refused directly and said: "If I don't have money, I won't borrow it even if I have it." Wang Yan knew in her heart that her mother-in-law was afraid that she would have no one to take care of her after she moved out. But the more her mother-in-law objected, the more she wanted to leave the house. In the end, she had to get help from her mother-in-law, plus the savings she had accumulated over the years. Got together the down payment.
Since moving out, although she has to pay off the mortgage and her quality of life has dropped sharply, Wang Yan feels a lot more relaxed. At least she no longer feels like she is being dependent on others, and she will no longer be treated as a nanny or an outsider. Nearly ten years have passed. My mother-in-law's health is not as good as before, and she sometimes needs someone to take care of her. Therefore, she actually asked her daughter-in-law to resign and return to her hometown to serve her, or let her come to her home to take care of her.
Faced with her mother-in-law's request, Wang Yan was naturally unwilling and directly replied: "Have you treated me as a family member for so many years?" Apart from ordering me to do things, do you care about me at all? The delicious food and drinks at home will only be given to your daughter. What did you say when I borrowed money from you to buy a house? But then your daughter got married, and you immediately took a car with her. Since you have no feelings for me, why should I take care of you? If you want to provide for yourself in old age, go find your daughter. After hearing this, the mother-in-law was speechless. Looking back on the past, she also knew that she had gone too far. Now that she has fallen to this point, it is her own fault.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is actually not that complicated. It is nothing more than being more tolerant and understanding. As long as they can treat each other equally and respect each other, they will naturally be able to get along harmoniously. However, the situation of every family is different and needs to be explored and tried. , can you find a suitable way of getting along. If you really can't get along, then live separately and keep a suitable distance. You can't see each other's shortcomings, and sometimes unnecessary conflicts can be avoided.
As a bridge of communication between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, men must actively handle conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in order to turn hostility into friendship. If they choose to avoid and show favoritism, it will only intensify the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and ultimately affect the relationship between husband and wife and the quality of marriage. If you can escape for a while, I felt relaxed for a while, but in the end it was myself who was in trouble, so I dared to face it and dealt with it rationally.
