He liked me for a long time, but when I accepted him, he ignored me. What should I do if I meet such a person? Is he playing with me? Forget it, don't ask, he is a scumbag!
The topic I share with you today is unrequited love, the English name is litbromantic. Let me make a statement first, it's not about whitewashing scumbag men and women, but there really is such a kind of person, or that there is such a kind of psychology. Actually I don't know how to classify it. Ordinary people’s view of love is that I want to give a lot to each other, and hope that the other person can give back my considerable love. If you have more, it will be better. If you can't give back, it will often be regarded as a kind of scum. In short, the love that most people pursue is actually being loved. Give, not get loved. This relationship will end, but unrequited love is different. They often fall in love with people, but they don't want to get rewards from each other, and they are afraid of being fallen in love. Once you feel the other person’s goodwill towards you, you will stop liking the other person and even hate the other person. The simple summary is that I like you who don't like me, or I don't like you who like me.
Most people’s love process is that I like him and I want to pursue him. After hard work, the other party finally accepted himself. In the early days of love, you and I are tired of being together all day. In the middle of the relationship, the passion fades, and the shortcomings of the other party are beginning to be discovered, maintaining the hard-won love, the end of the relationship, the trivial matters in life, a new third party or other factors, the two may quarrel or break up peacefully.
The love process of unrequited love is, wow, he is so handsome, he is so beautiful, or he is so talented. I like him, I want to pursue him. After a while, the other party was moved, and then the relationship ended. Of course it is not the real end, but the feeling of love in the hearts of unrequited lovers. They may really be together, but they will not feel sweet. Even the better the other party treats him, the more disgusting he is. In the end, they often get the title of a scumbag or a scumbag, and then break up.
So can unrequited lovers feel the sweetness of love? In fact, it is possible, but their sweetness is provided by themselves. They only need to have a favorite object, and all that object needs to do is ignore him, and they can be self-sufficient. And most of us need objects to reward us,We will feel sweetness, and sometimes when rewards are small, we will complain.
Comparing the two, I think unrequited lovers live more in their own world or in their own fantasy world. From this point of view, I think he has something in common with inferiority complex or avoidant personality, and he is reluctant to have actual contact with the outside world, but there is still a big difference in essence. Regarding unrequited love, everyone's views cannot be unified. Some people think that this is a kind of disease, a kind of psychological disorder, and it needs to be treated by a psychiatrist. Some people think that this is a kind of sexual orientation, it is real, as long as it doesn't feel painful, it's good to keep it like this. If you feel that you or the people around you fit this situation, you can consult a professional psychologist and let them judge for you. Don't just label yourself.
So here comes the topic, is he a scumbag? Analyzing from their behavior, he saw that the beloved took the initiative to tease others, and he didn't feel it after they agreed. If you don’t pay during your relationship, and you feel that the other person is nauseous, this is obviously playing with other people’s feelings, and it is indeed a perfect match for the standards of scum. Then we shall judge him as a scumbag, but there seems to be something wrong. An analogy is that a person suffering from a severe mental illness is the kind of person who cannot recognize or control their behavior. If they kill someone, the court will often not pursue their criminal responsibility, but will send them to the relevant medical institutions for compulsory treatment. why? I will make my own understanding. If it is not correct, please correct me. Since this kind of patient is controlled by a certain disease, is the patient equivalent to a tool, like a knife, then who killed someone? Is it the knife that killed the person or the disease that controlled the knife killed the person? I think it was the disease that killed the person. Then the knife should not be sentenced to death, but the death penalty for this disease. Therefore, the patient will be forced to be sent to the relevant medical institution for compulsory treatment, that is, the death penalty is forcibly executed for this disease. So these same unrequited loves do not seem to be scumbags in the standard sense.
What am I most afraid of? It's just that some people do things like scumbags and scumbags under the guise of unrequited lovers, and even come to Boss to sympathize afterwards. The last term, like women's rights and dog lovers, has been distorted by some people.Okay, let’s introduce a situation like this to everyone. Maybe I have something wrong, welcome to correct and add in the comment area.
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