Couples often want to know whether their relationship problems are "normal". Does every couple struggle and fight like them? What are common relationship problems?
Although every relationship is unique, most couples will encounter areas of conflict when they spend their lives together. As your relationship deepens and becomes more serious, it makes sense that your conversations may involve deeper and more serious topics. Inevitably, you will have to deal with major decisions and face challenges.
Dealing with conflicts and different perspectives is a natural and necessary part of a healthy relationship. The most important thing is how you communicate with each other, deal with problems, and support each other in difficult times so that you can grow together rather than separate.
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Here are 8 common relationship problems that most couples face:
1. Adapt to major changes in life or relationship milestones
Withstand internal pressure (planning a wedding or living together), just as it will face external pressure (helping a sick family member or surviving a pandemic).
When you learn how to deal with life-changing choices as a whole, exciting relationship decisions, such as buying a house, can cause temporary problems. Periods of transition or uncertainty will naturally cause anxiety and put more pressure on your relationship. External pressures from your family, community, and the world can also cause conflict.
2. Clear communication
In a healthy relationship, communication is very important. Some couples find it challenging to face conflict and communicate effectively. This can lead to misunderstandings, resentments and disagreements. Communication problems may be due to different communication styles and personal history, including childhood experiences and past relationship experiences.
When public communication fails, it may be difficult for couples to find common ground.
For example, if you feel that no one is interested in other major relationships, it may be difficult for you to express concerns or share feelings in your current relationship. Couples can improve their communication by using more "I" statements and listening to understand (rather than defend). They need to gain empathy, learn how to negotiate gracefully, and verify each other's feelings.
3. Boundaries with family and friends
You and your partner may have different opinions on the extent to which you want family and friends to participate. You may have different opinions on how much time you spend with family and friends, how to spend holidays and special occasions, and how much time you share with others outside your relationship. If you model your health boundaries poorly, problems may also arise—or your family’s boundaries and expectations are different. It is helpful to protect your relationship as a team and put each other first. The establishment of a united front is crucial.
4. Finance
Money may be one of the most important topics in relationships and marriage. From the amount of savings and expenses, how to build a bank account (independent or joint), and general financial habits or financial value, everything has proved to be problematic. Financial conditions can also bring uncomfortable or hidden power dynamics in your relationship. For example, keeping personal debts with your partner will inevitably lead to trust issues. When it comes to money, the best way is to avoid keeping secrets and to be honest when discussing finances.
5. Division of Labor and Family Responsibilities
This area of conflict may be related to prejudice, unrealistic expectations and traditional beliefs surrounding gender roles. Studies have shown that, despite working outside, women often bear the burden of maintaining the family, which can lead to long-term mental health problems, resentment and interpersonal problems. This is why both you and your partner must be satisfied with the way responsibilities are assigned.It may help to count all household chores and work together to distribute them fairly.
6. Sex and intimacy
Having a healthy sex life is part of a healthy relationship. However, it is common for couples to have different sexual needs, preferences and desires. For example, the frequency of arguing about sex may make you or your partner feel rejected or dissatisfied.
Problems in the bedroom can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction or rejection.
Sexual dysfunction may also play a role in sexual problems. Therefore, it is very important to address any underlying psychological or physical reasons. Talking about sex may make you feel uncomfortable, but many couples have problems with their sex lives, so you are not alone.
7. Children and parenting
When a couple changes from a partner to a parent, a new dimension of their relationship is born (literally!). New parents will divert their attention from their relationship when taking on the challenge of caring for a newborn. It may be difficult to be a parent together and maintain a romantic life.
It is normal to experience a learning curve in parenting. During this process, you may encounter problems. As a parent, you may find yourself in a never-ending field of decision-making. Over time, this may cause discord. Parenting together and making decisions about raising children may be one of the happiest and most stressful aspects of your relationship.
8. Healthy work-life balance
When discussing how to spend free time, how to arrange careers, and how to balance personal and professional life, personal preferences may conflict. For example, you may disagree on how to spend the weekend or what kind of vacation you want.
Maybe as an introvert, you long for time alone,And feel exhausted due to social experience. Maybe your outgoing partner thrives in a vibrant social life. Or maybe your partner does more work than you want, and you aspire to have more quality time as a couple. Regardless of the specific situation, many couples must work hard by balancing their personal wishes or obligations with the needs of supporting their partners.
These problems can be overcome with the right skills
Conflict is _strong108 The normal part of each relationship and marriage. strong If you disagree from time to time, there is nothing wrong with your relationship or partner. If you have different experiences, different personalities, and different values, problems will naturally arise. A relationship without a problem does not exist.
However, if you keep feeling unattended and your partner controls you or ignores your feelings, the conflict may cause further damage to your relationship. It can even reach unhealthy levels.
If you and your partner have difficulty reaching a consensus, or your conflict is increasing, you may need to seek couples treatment to resolve these and other potential problems.
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