In daily life, due to various reasons, many people become single after getting older. Parents are gone, children are independent, and their loneliness and loneliness follow.
At the time when material life is abundant, people's spiritual needs are getting higher and higher. Especially for some elderly people after retirement, who have a certain financial foundation and a lot of free time, how to live happily and happily is the most important thing.
In order to improve the quality of life, many single elderly people choose to remarry or live with partners. However, due to certain factors, they tend to separate property from feelings. Is this really good?
The 56-year-old Aunt Yin in the courtyard was deeply impressed after three years of remarrying, and she couldn't help but sigh: Don't let life AA become a fashion cover for exquisite self-interest.
01
My ex-husband and I are college classmates, and we entered marriage soon after we walked out of school. But in the face of social and economic development, everyone's cognition level is different, so there are differences in pursuits. In the words of that time, there is no common language.
When our daughter was 10 years old, we broke up peacefully. My child and I still live in the unit’s share of the house, but he moved out and soon had a new family.
For more than a decade, our mothers depended on each other, one reading and the other working, and there was no lack of joy and sweetness in the ordinary. Unknowingly, the child was older and married, and I suddenly realized that I was getting old.
My daughter often joked that she is about to retire and find a partner. She has been with me over the years, but she won't work for the rest of her life! Listen, is this still a biological girl? When you get married, you forget my mother!
It's a joke, a child has a life he pursues, so I really can't bother it. If letting go is trust and encouragement to them, then regulating their personal lives is to give them freedom and comfort.
02
At one year’s industry exhibition,I got acquainted with Lao Liang who is a dealer. A buyer, a seller; a manufacturer, an agent, we talked together for our own interests.
Lao Liang speaks very humorously and straightforwardly, giving people an impression of informality and carelessness. After a few contacts, we became familiar with each other, and we felt very angry. We left contact information with each other and made an appointment to get together again when we had time.
After the exhibition, there are a lot of customer information that needs to be sorted out. I didn't care too much about Lao Liang, thinking it was just a polite courtesy. Unexpectedly, a few days later, he really called and said that he wanted to invite me to dinner.
After a period of time, we gradually became friends and we also learned more about each other. It can be seen that he has a great affection for me and his speech and behavior are very enthusiastic.
Women are indeed very emotional. Even if you know that the compliments and pursuits of the opposite sex may not be true, they will still like very much.
03
Although I am more traditional, I am not conservative. For many new things and new ideas, I am very willing to accept as long as I am not out of line.
Once when I was shopping with me, Lao Liang bought a bouquet of roses and proposed to me in front of many people. Although I was a little cautious because I was not mentally prepared, I was still very happy and readily agreed.
However, after getting married, Lao Liang put forward an unexpected proposal, that is, the AA system on the cost of living.
He explained that we have our own children and relatives and friends behind us. It is inevitable that there will be some big and small things. In order to make the relationship pure and to reduce the trouble, this method should be relatively fair and reasonable.
It sounds like what he said is not unreasonable, and I am also fully self-reliant. I don't want to care about money and what is cheap, so I agreed without thinking about it.
Actually , can emotion and money really be separated? Especially couples living together,If you and mine are counted so clearly, the feelings will be pure and there will be no contradictions?
04
As my life continued, I gradually discovered some problems.
First of all, Lao Liang and I's AA system is only limited to money, and did not explain the specific aspects of doing things. Because his business is relatively busy, many things at home are naturally pushed onto me, such as housework, receiving relatives and friends, etc.
As a couple with a good relationship, if these are acceptable, sometimes the unclear approach makes people uncomfortable.
This is another point I want to say. One year, Lao Liang had financial problems, so he discussed with me whether he could help him temporarily.
As for money, I have never had much idea about money, not to mention having such a close relationship with each other, it is difficult, I must lend a helping hand! Without any hesitation, I immediately took my daughter’s 200,000 plus my own 100,000, and transferred it to him, and said that it was not enough, but I could think of a way.
To be honest, in my heart, the relationship between two people is the most important thing. As for money or not, it really doesn’t matter. The relationship is harmonious. Isn’t it happiness to eat and drink?
05
One year later, I found that things are not as simple as I thought.
When borrowing money, Lao Liang said that it would take only 3 months to turn around and promised that the money could not be borrowed for nothing. I told him that it’s okay, just take care of the daughter over there. After all, it’s not easy for the child to save some money.
But when the day was agreed to pay back the money, Lao Liang delayed and apologized every time, saying that he was really embarrassed and he needed to wait a little longer. As a result, one year passed, and the daughter and the couple were a little dissatisfied.
Later, Lao Liang finally got the money back, but he said nothing about the previous statements.There was no way, I had to take a few thousand dollars to my daughter, falsely claiming that it was from Lao Liang.
I have heard exquisite self-interest a long time ago. Some people have high IQs, high EQs, old-fashioned things, and often disguise themselves carefully to achieve personal goals for personal gain.
For a long time, I have not had much knowledge and thinking about such people and things, but I have been deeply moved by living with Lao Liang for 3 years. Through consideration and introspection, I can't help but regret it a little. Is the so-called fairness of the AA system just a fashion cover for exquisite self-interest?
I don't know if I can continue with Lao Liang, but fortunately, I can see clearly the hypocritical relationship between the AA system of fashion personality and exquisite self-interest.
Of course, there are many reasons for this situation, such as the social environment, the concept of life, and personal cultivation.
First of all, With the development of society, people have more and more desires and pursue higher and higher . Those so-called smart people with high IQ, for their own selfishness, will do everything possible and unscrupulous under the cover of a hypocritical mask.
Secondly, the economy has developed, and the concept has also changed. In people's minds, money has become more and more important . Money is not omnipotent, and the consciousness that no money is inevitable has been imperceptibly subtly.
In addition, in the process of 's personal growth, the score-only theory and the money-only theory also overemphasize and highlight the development of personality, making self-interest become a matter of course.
For this phenomenon, everyone and every family should attach great importance to it, because it will affect the direction of our future life. Knowing yourself, starting with me, not following blindly, and keeping yourself clean, maybe it is a good choice, right?
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Thank you for your reading and support,I wish you health and happiness!
Author: trace of phishing, a cheerful, fun-loving feelings about who is willing to accompany mentorship taste of life, joke life.
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