Netizens ask:
How do psychologists educate their children?
I have seen many cases and felt that the initial habit formation of a child needs some compulsion, but I also feel that the child may have a heart knot at any time, which feels like walking on thin ice. I don't know where the degree of control is. In the future, I want to be a good parent. I want to know what principles psychologists follow in educating their children, what they will do in study and life, and what are the common things that parents ignore or misunderstand?
We have learned a lot of 4’s goals from the previous work of Rickson. , Not problem-oriented.
If the parent is obsessed with the problem, it will be easy for the child to be led by the nose.
Under normal circumstances, parents do not think education is troublesome. When parents find trouble, it must be the child's mistakes. When repeated teaching is not corrected, the psychologist's treatment in this situation It is very useful for reference.
Let me share two cases about him
span1 span1 span1 span1 span1 _span _span _strong span1My son Lance came home from elementary school, and he ran to me and said, "Daddy, all the other kids in school have been beaten, but I have not been beaten. So, I want to be beaten. "
I replied, "I have no reason to hit your ass."
He said, "I will give you a good reason to go out." So he broke the clinic and left. Of a window.
He came back and asked me: "Now, can I be beaten ass?"
I said, "No, what I should do is change your window. A meal doesn’t help at all.”
He vomited and ran out again, breaking another glass window: "Now, you can beat me!"
I replied: "No, I have to change to the other side of the glass window." In order to get beaten up, he broke seven glass windows in a row. And when he went out for the seventh mission, I was standing on the balcony of the apartment, lining up seven of his beloved toy trucks on the balcony railing. After breaking the seventh glass window, he entered the house again to provoke: "I broke the seventh glass window. Can you beat me in the ass?"
I still remain unmoved: " Next, changing the glass is what I should do.” Then, I said to him: “Now, you have seven small trucks lined up on the balcony railings. I am going to let the first truck drive away, hoping it will Brake in time,Not to fall to the sidewalk downstairs and fall to pieces. Oh, what a misfortune! I hope that the second one can stop in time.
He lost seven small trucks. After about three weeks, he happily went home from school. I grabbed him, put him sideways on my lap, and punched him in the butt. He felt inexplicable: "Why are you doing this?"
I said, "I seem to remember that you asked me to punch your ass, and I did not meet your expectations."
He replied: "I understand better now."
Of course, I didn't really beat him, it was just a symbolic butt beat.
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Eriksson demonstrated an important principle used to discipline children and treat cases.
He will never respond to the request of the party, but will make the most appropriate response according to the situation.
02
span1 when a small seminar is being held in the span1 officeMy grandson Daukras broke in suddenly. He showed me his newly bought sneakers and then turned and left. About forty minutes later, he appeared again, and I was in the process of demonstrating how to deepen the hypnotic state.
I told him: "Douglas, leave now." And he cheered and said, "I can't hear what you are talking about."
to the house and I repeat, "Leave " Go inside."
Douglas had to walk out of the office as ordered, but slammed the door shut. Obviously, he didn't want to leave, but he shouldn't slam the door shut. If he were my son, I would ask him in a cordial tone for no reason: "Please slam the door shut." I would ask him to do this while he is busy reading a picture book, although he is full Suspicious but will follow orders. I will thank him and ask him to do it again, he will slam the door again, but I don’t know what medicine is in my gourd, and I will ask him to slam the door again.
He would say, "But I want to read."
"Anyway, please slam the door shut again." I will insist that he do it again.
He would slam the door shut again as he said, and after a while, he would ask me why I kept asking him to slam the door so I took the opportunity to remind him of the initial situation and said: "The way you slammed the door makes me think you like to slam the door."
His answer must be: "I really don't like slamming the door.
In this type of situation, you can quickly learn that something is not in line with your intentions.
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Eriksen aims to provide the right prescription.
makes Douglas slam the door loudly in an unwilling situation, and he is bound to find that he does not "like" doing so.
Then he will realize that slamming the door is just his subconscious or reactionary behavior, not a behavior he "desires" to do.
After this lesson, in the future, he may turn to trying to control his personal behavior and try to do what he really "desires" to do. At least, he will have a deeper understanding of his words and deeds.
All of your reprints will help school-absent children, so there is no need to apply for copyright permission.
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