I don’t usually chase stars, but recently a “Internet celebrity” Fan Xiaohui has attracted a lot of attention, and I didn’t understand it at all before. But that day, I saw that the military wife, who had only met 4 times in 8 years, was "involved" by , which was a bit shocked.
I couldn't help but follow this internet celebrity called "Fan Xiaohui". She has nearly 9 million fans, and her husband is a soldier stationed on the frontier. They have only met 4 times in 8 years of marriage.
Fan Xiaohui was born in the countryside. Because she was a girl, she was soon abandoned by her parents who favored boys over girls. Fortunately, a kind-hearted grandmother adopted her, and her grandmother's fourth uncle and fourth aunt became Fan Xiaohui's "parents". After that, Fan Xiaohui has been living with her grandmother. But when Fan Xiaohui was in her twenties, her grandmother died of illness.
Although the closest relative left, Fan Xiaohui had already had the ability to support herself at this time. Unfortunately, his biological parents came to find her again. Fan Xiaohui followed her biological parents back to her hometown, and under the arrangement of her parents, she went on a blind date, met her current husband, and then got married and had children.
Due to the huge identity gap, the mother-in-law doesn’t like her and her husband is not around for many years, so Fan Xiaohui not only has to take care of the children alone, but also finds ways to make money to support her family. She is capable and kind. Although her mother-in-law dislikes her, she is filial to her husband and will visit her mother-in-law during the holidays. Such a perfect, capable and kind woman was unexpectedly let down.
Seeing this, I suddenly thought of Mai Xiaodeng , an internet celebrity with tens of millions of fans. She was abandoned by her mother when she was very young. It was her father and aunt who took care of her and grew up.
Because her father was sick, Mai Xiaodeng returned to the countryside. Her short video recorded her life back to the countryside. Like Fan Xiaohui, Mai Xiaodeng is super capable. She can drive tractors and do all kinds of farm work. She weighs only 90 kilograms, but she seems to have infinite strength and can do anything.
is also the unfortunate Mai Xiaodeng, who is a native family, and like Fan Xiaohui, he is a million internet celebrities. But they now have a different ending. Mai Xiaodeng has a father who dotes on her, Shihao No. 6, who treats her as the little princess, and a mother-in-law who treats her as her daughter. What Fan Xiaohui spent 8 years waiting for was betrayal, and she endured everything alone.
" A happy childhood can heal your life, and an unfortunate childhood must be healed for a lifetime". Mai Xiaodeng wrote a letter to the mother who "abandoned" her. The firmness and calmness between the lines can be seen that her unfortunate childhood has been healed. Fan Xiaohui has been actively protecting her husband and pleasing her mother-in-law over the years, but she was still hurt. In the stories of the two of them, I understand the principles of raising a daughter.
Girls don’t need to be overly “raising wealth”, they need to be strong in their hearts
“raising sons in poverty and raising daughters in wealth”. Over the years, it has been popular online to raise girls in wealth. However, excessive material wealth can easily cause children to lose themselves and also can easily cause children to lose their ability to be independent. Compared to material wealth, what is more important is to give your daughter spiritual wealth, so that they can fill themselves, not easily lose themselves, and be strong inside, and not easily defeated by life.
Fan Xiaohui and Mai Xiaodeng have poor family conditions and have experienced a lot of hardships since childhood, without the so-called "rich support". Faced with various challenges and difficulties in life, they all faced difficulties and were not easily defeated. So they have achieved their current achievements, and girls with strong hearts can face life actively at any time.
Give girls enough fatherly love, which is the best sense of security
The biggest difference between Fan Xiaohui and Mai Xiaodeng is fatherly love. Mai Xiaodeng has a father who loves her very much, which is also her greatest sense of security.
There was a survey showing that "girls who lack fatherly love since childhood are more likely to fall in love early and are more likely to meet scumbags ." The so-called "tiger father has no dog daughter", the father plays a crucial role in shaping his daughter's personality, because the father is the first male in a girl's life to be exposed to. His words and deeds are all lost in the eyes and heart of his daughter, and he has become the object of imitation for girls.Fathers are also a model of the opposite sex in the eyes of daughters, and often become the standard for girls to choose a spouse. A good father beat 100 principals.
Ma Yili said in "Reader": "Especially for girls, if there is a father who loves her very much, this girl will be very confident in living in the world." So without enough fatherly love is the greatest sense of security and confidence for girls.
Girls do not need to be sensible and avoid forming a flattering personality
Regarding Fan Xiaohui's incident, many netizens have revealed signs of her husband cheating very early. I think I only met 4 times in 8 years, and with some of the actions and words during the meeting, Xiaohui should have felt that her husband had a strange intention very early. But she has been giving the other party a chance and trying to do better, but there is still no last life-saving straw. The fact is cruel.
What happened to Xiaohui is particularly angry, and many people stand up for her. She was too sensible but didn't get a good ending.
Fudan Professor Chen Guo said: Mature people will slowly live into a beam of light. If anyone approaches TA, they are close to the light. Those sensible girls have long lived a ray of light that can warm others. But who can be her light?
Sensible children should sacrifice their ideas to cater to the needs of adults. They dare not do what they like and dare not express their true needs. Over time, they gradually lost their own independent thoughts, suppressed their own ideas, and tried hard to please anyone, but they only felt wronged.
As the saying goes, "Raising a son for a while, raising a daughter for a lifetime." Girls are the concern of parents throughout their lives. As a little cotton jacket at home, we can do our daughter not only to strive to protect them, but more importantly, to teach them the rules of survival. May every girl be treated gentlely! #2022 Parenting Season#
