Hello everyone, I am the second child mother Xiaoyan.
On the weekend, I met two mothers chatting. One mother said to another mother: "My children are almost three years old and still don't speak. The old man was so anxious that he urged them to take their children to see a doctor every day. She felt that it was nothing, but the noble man was too late to speak." Another mother also agreed with her statement, and the boy was already talking late.
I observed the mother and probably understood why her child was unwilling to speak? She took care of her too carefully. With one expression or action of the child, the mother understood and satisfied the child's needs, so the child naturally no longer needed to speak.
As a mother who raises two children, I naturally know the anxiety of many parents now. Especially children who don’t know how to crawl, walk late, and talk late... will become the source of parents’ anxiety, making many parents worry. And a calm mother like this mother at the beginning is indeed rare and worth learning from.
But mothers are calm, which does not mean that we are inaction. We should pay attention to it, check it yourself and compare it, and then find out the reasons why the child speaks late and help the child express it.
The language development process of children
Master Hu Jing of the University of Pittsburgh in the United States pointed out in the article that our language development is divided into three stages: pronunciation, understanding and expression. In other words, it first goes through language understanding and then develops into language expression.
htmlbaby under 41 years old : communicate through voice, crying and body language, and respond to some familiar words.
html Children under 42 years old: Start putting 2-3 words together to form simple sentences.
3-4 years old: start to learn more complex meanings in vocabulary, such as asking: "What is the sea?", you can clearly express your thoughts and feelings.
5 years old and over : Being able to understand and use newly learned sentences to express can explain what happened and why?
Although each child has different language development, some speak early and some speak late, if they don’t speak after the age of 2 and a half, parents should pay attention and it is best to find the reasons.
Possible reasons why children do not speak
1. Genetic factors: father or mother speaks late, and the child will naturally speak late
Brain Science Expert Professor Hong Lan said in the book that one of her colleagues is a professor. The eldest child is still not speaking at the age of four or five. She took the child to search for famous doctors and did countless examinations. They all said that the child is fine, but the child has been slow to speak, which made her very worried. When she was 6 years old, the boss suddenly spoke and said it in a whole sentence as soon as she opened her mouth, which surprised her.
The second child was the same later. He didn't speak at the age of four or five. It was not until she and her husband returned to her in-laws' house that she learned that her husband and his younger brother and sister were both 6 years old. She only realized that the two children spoke late due to genetic factors.
2. Parents are taciturn, and their children's language environment is poor
. Parents are taciturn, and they do not give their children a rich language environment, so their children are naturally silent. Only when caregivers provide them with rich language stimulation can children have a rich vocabulary and express themselves.
The book "Parents' Language" preaches that parents' language directly shapes the child's brain. The more parents talk to their children and become talkative parents, the faster the child's vocabulary grows, the higher the child's intelligence level after the age of three. Children from high-income families hear 560,000 more languages than children from low-income families.
The children who win at the starting line do not have the wealth of their families, but they can be influenced by a rich and positive environment when they are born. The early language environment is the key to affecting children's ultimate learning ability.
So, after the child is born, we have to talk to the child more, even if we miss it, even if we describe what is happening to the child, even if what we do seems a little stupid to outsiders, because this is all the precious wealth we give to the child.
3. Parents are overly careful, understand their children, and do everything. The three-year-old child who is unwilling to speak at the beginning of
is because of a too enthusiastic mother. The child wanted to play with the spoon, so he looked at his mother and understood it and quickly handed the spoon to him.
The child looks at his mother and the mother knows what the child thinks and immediately meets the child's needs, because he knows that his expression and body language have shown everything, and the mother understands her very much. Over time, the child is reluctant to speak.
Some mothers also complained to me, didn’t they say that parents should respond to their children in a timely manner? We are meeting the needs of our children, and we are loving them! How can our kindness destroy children's willingness to speak? So what exactly should we do?
Indeed, When we accompany our children to grow up, we should be their observers, respond to their needs in a timely manner, meet their needs unconditionally, and give them sufficient love and nutrition. However, responding to children in a timely manner does not mean that we take care of everything, but when the child points at the toy, ask the child if he wants to play with the toy, communicate with the child and create an environment for language communication.
Especially after the child is one and a half years old, when the child has something to do, we can wait for the child next to him, encourage the child to express it, and then meet them. If they cannot express themselves yet, when we satisfy them, we can repeatedly describe the toys in our hands to help them express themselves.
Children don’t like to talk, parents can do this
Although language development has a time and genetic factors, as parents, we can provide children with a rich language environment to help children speak early and stimulate their language development.
1. Talking more to children
Children learn to speak through imitation. If caregivers talk more to children, children will learn more vocabulary in a rich and positive environment, thereby stimulating their brain development and being more willing to speak.
So, after the child is born, we can talk to the child more. For example, when helping children take a bath, describe what we are doing to them. "Mom wants to put you in a bucket and take a bath. We will wash our hair with a towel first, wash our hair clean, and wash our face clean..."
takes the child out for a walk, and describes the big trees on the roadside, green grass, and colorful flowers to the child. When a child is interested in curtains, stare at the curtains and we can describe it to him: "Is the baby looking at the curtains? There are white flowers on it, and the curtains are chosen by the mother..."
More we talk to the child, the more vocabulary the child has, the faster the brain develops.
2. Stimulate the child’s willingness to speak
Be a child’s observer and respond to the child in time, but don’t rush to satisfy the child, so as to stimulate the child’s speech expression.
For example, when a child starts to babble, we respond more to the child's babble, imitate their babble, let them know that their words are liked and encouraged, and thus they are more willing to babble.
When the child calls for his mother, the mother should respond to the child in time and hug the child enthusiastically, tell the child that when the mother hears you calling him mother, the mother hears you, the mother likes you calling him mother very much.
3. Sing more nursery rhymes, finger rhymes,
nursery rhymes or finger rhymes are catchy and rhythmic, which is convenient for children to imitate pronunciations. We sing nursery rhymes with our children more often and play finger rhymes, and children will be more willing to speak under the stimulation of repetitive and rich language.
There are some differences in children's speech, and there are individual differences. Parents should not be too anxious. However, if the child still does not speak after the age of two and a half, it is best for parents to pay attention and check it for the child to avoid affecting the child's language development due to their carelessness.
