A few days ago, my sister-in-law sent me a distressed message, asking me to tell my parents when I was free not to give sodas, especially frozen ones, to my children because she felt that my parents would listen to me more. .
I think my sister-in-law had no choice but to send me this message. We understand that parents love their grandchildren very much, but sometimes they do love them a little "irrationally". For example, when it's almost time for dinner, they still give them food; if their children have a cold and need to avoid eating, they still insist on going their own way. ...
The picture comes from the Internet
Will this kind of inconsistent concepts in the parenting process also have a negative impact on the children? Will they feel confused and confused in the process, "Who should I listen to?" A feeling of uneasiness gradually arises in their hearts.
Sometimes, children will also form a pattern in this process. Once they want to eat something that is not allowed by their parents, they will ask their grandparents to go there, because they know that their grandparents will definitely give it to them and they will definitely give it to them. Will protect them. In this way, parents' education will become more difficult, because the grandparents are not on the same front as the parents. The work to be done at this time is not only for the children, but also for the grandparents.
Originally, husband and wife would have different opinions and frictions on childcare, plus grandparents, or more family members. If the boundaries between each other are not clear, then as parents, it will cost more. energy in dealing with these relationships.
If possible, it is really recommended to live as a small family unit. This is relatively worry-free and the environment for raising children will be simpler and more unified. However, many people have no choice but to live under the same roof. Since In this case, it is recommended that adults communicate and discuss these differences in private and try to avoid "war" breaking out in front of children.
My sister-in-law asked me to communicate with my parents. How should we communicate more effectively? Direct preaching? I guess it goes in the left ear and out the right ear.
Behind the preaching is the "negation" of the other party. If it doesn't work well, it will make the other party feel disgusted. Then it is better to take advantage of their habit of occasionally browsing Tiktok and find some advice on Tiktok that does not recommend giving children too much frozen food. Isnât it also good to forward the video to them, or forward the relevant news reports to them, and at the same time educate the elderly on science?
I have to admit that sometimes raising children between two generations is really distressing. The main problem is the boundary of interpersonal relationships. The question of "should we give cold drinks to our children?" is also a question of power struggle between two generations.
