After the parent-teacher meeting yesterday afternoon, I went to the cafe with my baby, got in the car, and I took out a book and started reading.
Son: Dad, what are you reading?
Me: I am learning how to grow with you. (The child looked at me curiously), then I said: Come, let’s find the problem.
son: OK.
Me: You have to answer the next question seriously.
son: OK.
Me: Look, the first question here is, doesn’t like to learn , don’t you also like to learn? (I guess he didn't expect me to ask this question. He looked at me and didn't dare to answer)
I continued: In fact, I know that you don't like to study in your heart. For us adults, most of us don't like to go to work either. People who work, think about it, if I have money just lying at home every day, then do I still have to go to work? If you were given a choice, would you go to school and study every day, or watch TV and play on your mobile phone at home? I think you will definitely choose to watch TV and play on your mobile phone at home, right?
When my son heard that I didn’t like going to work and guessed that he didn’t like to study, he immediately said: Yes, I choose to watch TV and play on my mobile phone at home.
Me: But think about it, if I don’t go to work, will I get paid?
wa: No.
Before I could start speaking, the baby said: I understand, if you don’t work, there will be no salary, then we will have no money to eat, and we will starve to death.
me: Yes. So, you see, the first problem you have is that you don’t like to study.
The baby nodded and said: Yes.
me: Let’s look at the second question, will not learn . Do you think you can learn? If I don't tell you, will you take the initiative to learn it yourself? Can you draw inferences about what you have learned?
wa: No.
This time the child answered very simply, because with the first answer, he knew that he had to answer truthfully.
me: Let’s look at the third question, is partial to science. must be very serious for you, right? Especially the writing part is really ugly, sometimes I don’t even know what is written.
wa: Yes, I like mathematics. I am good at mathematics.
Me: Don’t say that you are good at mathematics. In terms of mathematics, you still have a lot of carelessness. I can only say that, relatively speaking, you are better at mathematics. But in the following summer vacation, you have to make up for the remaining gaps.
The baby nodded, probably because he heard that he had to make up for the summer vacation, so he didn't answer.
Me: Let’s look at the fourth question again, has no results.
wa: What does it mean that there are no results?
Me: Let me give you an analogy, just like you skipping rope , you could only jump a dozen times a minute before, but now you can jump more than 100. However, if you practice skipping every day, you are lazy every day. , in the end, you could only dance a dozen or so at the beginning. Finally, after a year, you could still only dance a dozen or so. Do you think you have made progress? Are there any results?
wa: No. I understand, it means that I am not good at studying.
Me: I didn’t say you didn’t study well. You have worked relatively hard over the past year and have made great progress in many aspects. You have achieved results this year. So, it’s not your problem if this doesn’t work out.
child: Dad, then this is not a problem. .
Seeing the baby pointing at the problem of poor parent-child relationship , I thought for a moment and said: Yes, this is not our problem. When we went to the parent-teacher meeting just now, I called you big brother. Are your classmates asking you? Why do I call you big brother?
wa: Yes, yes.
Me: Let’s look at the next question. Don’t you have ideal ?
wa: No, I do. My ideal is to play football.
Me: Okay, let’s first set an ideal for playing football. The premise is that you have completed your studies well. As you grow up, when you gain knowledge and know more things, the ideal can be adjusted. For example, you can be a scientist and work for the country's scientific cause, or you can be a policeman or the People's Liberation Army to protect your country. You can also open a company like me and provide more employment opportunities for this society... Of course, if you want to play football now, I support it, but the prerequisite is to complete your studies. As I said before, don't be partial to subjects.
wa: Okay, I understand.
me: The last question, doesn’t your have a friend ? When you were in kindergarten, you told me that you had no friends, but what about now?
child: I have friends now. ***, ***, *** in our class are my friends, and *** from the kindergarten is my friend. We played together some time ago, and *** is also my friend, but we haven’t been to Leshan for a long time, and there is Uncle Dalong’s daughter, the daughter of your college roommate...
Me: Okay, I understand, I will take you to Leshan in a while .
kid: Dad, what does this mean?
I looked at the place the child pointed at, which was the roots, stems, leaves, fruits...
I said: Look at the trees outside, are they growing well? With lush branches and leaves, your growth is like this tree. Under the tree are roots. Although we cannot see them, these roots are very important. Without roots, this tree cannot survive. Just like your interests, if you are not interested in learning and just study every day to cope with it, then in the end , you will not achieve results in your studies. Therefore, only if you are interested in learning first, then the root will be good, and then you must take action and persist in learning, so that you can maintain yourself in a state. This action is doing. You see, it is the root of this tree. The main part requires a large trunk and branched auxiliary trunks. Only with the trunk can the tree grow leaves. Think about it, if the leaves of this tree only grow on one side of the tree or on one branch, you will Do you think this tree looks good?
wa: It doesn’t look good.
Me: So, partial science is like growing leaves. You can’t just grow them in one place. You have to get them evenly with rain and dew, and they have to grow a little in every place. Just like studying, if you study Chinese for 10 minutes, then math will also take 10 minutes, and English will also take 10 minutes. It cannot be said that you can study more if you like it, and study less if you don't like it.
wa: Oh.
Me: But there is a situation where you can allocate your time. For example, you are doing math very quickly. If you can ensure that after you finish it, you can check again and everything will be fine. Well, mathematics is your current advantage, but if you are not good at Chinese, then you have to improve your Chinese. At this time, you can study mathematics for 10 minutes and Chinese for 20 minutes.
wa: Oh.
Me: In the end, a tree is perfect when it has roots, trunk, leaves, flowers and fruits.
Then, you see, in order for a tree to grow, it needs soil, sunlight, and other trees to grow together, so that everyone will get better and better.
kid: I understand, dad. I strive to make myself love learning.
Me: It’s right to work hard, but I hope you can truly love learning. You think, you are still young, what can you do if you don’t study? Like me, if I don't work, what can I do? I am also trying to make myself truly love work, so that I can work well and be happy at work, instead of not loving work in my heart, and then complaining about doing work every day, which is not good.
wa: Okay, I understand.
Looking at him who seems to understand something, sometimes I really feel that as a father, there are really too many things to think about. Especially after attending the parent-teacher meeting yesterday, I saw the responsible teachers explaining things to our parents one by one on the stage. I really found that with such a good class teacher, as a parent, we have to work harder.Nowadays, everyone is talking about collaborative education between home, school and community, so we have to start from ourselves.
