Because as parents, they are always the "strong" party in front of their children. They always seem to have the reason and qualification to correct their children's speech and behavior through scolding and punishment. However, those who like to "talk back" and refute no matter wh

What's going on when the children talk back to them no matter what their parents say?

I think most parents, in the process of raising, caring for and nurturing their children, the most intolerable thing is their children's "talking back".

Because as parents, we are always the "strong" party in front of our children. We always seem to have reasons and qualifications to correct our children's speech and behavior through scolding and punishment.

But those who like to "talk back" no matter what their parents say Children who challenge their parents' dignity, authority and self-confidence all the time will undoubtedly make every parent feel exhausted and anxious.

So what should parents do if their children like to "talk back"?

First, children like to "talk back" because their parents always "take care of everything".

It is conceivable that when a child makes every attempt in life and studies, the parents standing behind want to get in front of the child, and takes his place to complete the task at hand and solve the problem at hand.

Such excessive interference and substitution will gradually wear away children's curiosity to learn new things and try new skills over time.

After all, in the mind of a child, the unknown world and life before him is full of endless difficulties and setbacks, and every time he tries as a weak and helpless person, he is naturally not as relaxed and comfortable as he is with the help and support of his parents.

So, if you want to prevent and cure children's "talking back" disease, the first principle is that parents should learn to let go and let their children do their own things.

Second, children like to "talk back" because parents often "cross the line."

In fact, every family has its own "hidden rules".

Of course, these explicit or implicit "rules" are basically formulated by parents who occupy a strong position.

For example, you cannot look at your mobile phone while eating. If a child repeatedly holds the mobile phone to watch videos, it will definitely lead to scolding from the parents.

For example, if a child goes to bed at 10 o'clock in the evening and has clearly finished his homework, but refuses to move away from the computer, it is not surprising that he will be criticized unceremoniously by a strict father and a loving mother.

In addition, girls may be required by their parents to no matter what happens, they must go home before 11 o'clock every night.

Such "time rules", on the one hand, prohibit girls from playing and running around outside, and on the other hand, they also reflect parents' careful care of their daughters' personal safety and physical and mental health.

Although the "hidden rules" that seem to be absolutely correct in the family, why do they become so disgusting in the minds of children, and why do children "talk back" unceremoniously no matter what their parents say?

Mainly because some parents often "cross the line".

In other words, it is clear that parents and children have agreed in advance on the "rules" for eating, sleeping and studying, but in the actual implementation process, children often follow the rules and parents refuse to change them despite repeated instructions.

Some children are concentrating on studying, but their parents take their children out for a walk on a whim;

Some children lie down in bed to sleep when the time comes, but their parents talk about great truths with great emotion.

There are also some children who have reached adolescence and always like to write their thoughts and thoughts in diaries. However, there are many parents who "confront" their children at this stage:

Children have to read what they don't want their parents to read.

Once the results come and go, the children have to start a long-term "family struggle" with their parents for their own emotional boundaries and emotional space.

In such a state, no matter what the parents say, the children will naturally be emotional, aggrieved and irritable, and "talk back" to the parents for no reason, in order to vent their inner unhappiness.

Third, children like to "talk back" because parents care too much about right and wrong.

Some parents, due to their own personalities and tempers, have to argue about right and wrong in everything, even at home.

We know that it is a good thing for a person to have a strong desire to win.

Whether it is in study, exams, in the workplace, or in life, the mentality of "always wanting to win" will, in most cases, prompt us to be courageous in adversity, be bold and careful in good times, and help us overcome all challenges and challenges. During the test, overcome setbacks, difficulties and powerful enemies.

But, except at home.

Especially for parents, if they want to win every dispute and debate with their children, they must criticize every word their children say word for word.

This approach hurts both feelings and children. It is obviously ridiculous.

Because there is no right or wrong between parents and children, as long as parents adhere to the basic principles of education, on the basis of accompanying their children, guide their children to love learning and ask questions, and cultivate their children's positive and happy emotional state, this is enough.

If you insist on arguing and making noises with your children from morning to night over trivial matters, in the end, you will only end up with a relationship between parents and children, indifference and isolation of affection.

In short, the most terrifying phenomenon in family education is Some parents educate their children every day and cannot do this or say this, but they themselves repeat the same mistakes every moment.

So for children, parents’ irresponsible and wrong examples, coupled with the “arrangement”, “crossing the line” and “reality” in daily words and deeds, will undoubtedly make them depressed, irritated, aggrieved and painful, and they can’t help but often Reasons for "talking back" to parents.

In the final analysis, there is still something wrong with the education methods of some parents.