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When one is less and less social, do you know what it means?
With a sense of belonging in the heart, there is a place for the soul to live, but without a sense of belonging in the heart, wherever you go, you are wandering.
Not everyone likes the bustling and lively, eager to be the focus of the crowd, nor is everyone envious of people who have social activities every day.
For some people, being alone is more comfortable, but in a crowd it seems lonely.
People who don't know, always feel that a loner is lonely and worthy of "sympathy", but he ignores that maybe he doesn't like to communicate. 's preferences.
Lang Lang is a person who likes to be alone. When his colleagues in the company meet in private, he will always refuse to shirk under various excuses.
After a long time, no one called him at the party between colleagues.
However, the new colleagues did not know that Lang Lang did not like to socialize, so he just dragged Lang Lang to the company party, no matter how much Lang Lang resisted.
When colleagues were singing on KTV and getting drunk, Lang Lang sat alone in the corner with his eyes closed and listened to the music.
When other people come to him with a wine glass to drink, he always refuses with a smile, and pushes the other party's wine glass away in a hurry.
He and his colleagues are like people from two worlds, so the hustle and bustle around him doesn't seem to interfere with Lang Lang's focus on his world alone.
The new colleague wondered why Lang Lang didn't take the initiative to sing and drink with his colleagues, Lang Lang said lightly: "I just don't like it..."
"Isn't this lonely? Alone"
"Do you think there are many people now, so I am not alone? ?"
Being alone is not the loneliness and loneliness of closing one's heart, but may be a wise choice to keep the inner joy.
Some people are busy with communication in order to relieve their anxiety that they cannot be alone, and can only force themselves to integrate into a circle that may be incompatible. There are also some people who are busy with all kinds of communication in order to survive, and strive to get to know more people and have more opportunities for cooperation...
However, compared with those who strive to squeeze into the crowd, there are actually more people who are alone and do not like to communicate. .
Every soul is actually "dugu", because it is an independent individual, but in fact, a person's heart can determine whether he is really lonely.
There are a few reasons why a person is becoming less and less social.
First, there is a sense of belonging in the heart
When a person has a sense of belonging in his heart, he no longer needs to spend time and energy on social interaction, in order to obtain the belonging of his heart.
When a person has a dream in his heart and has found a small circle and living state that suits his heart, he will only spend his time on all things that can enter his private domain, and will not ask for anyone outside the circle. Look for an emotional connection.
People who don't know it will think Lang Lang doesn't fit in with the group, but in fact Lang Lang has two close friends in private, they talk about everything, and they can support each other in times of difficulty.
Lang Lang listens to songs in his spare time. He sits on his small coffee table and makes a pot of hot tea.Or sit on the small coffee table, read a book, and miss her in a long-distance relationship...
He occasionally goes out to meet old friends, and occasionally takes the train to the city he misses, to meet the person he misses.
He has a plan in his heart and he has already found someone who can live in his life, so he is very indifferent to interpersonal relationships.
When a person encounters his own little world, and his heart is full of joy and happiness, he will naturally reduce useless social interactions, and leave time and energy to worthy people and things.
People outside his circle think he is withdrawn and aloof, and those within his circle can best understand his real life state.
Second, when the mind is mature, take the initiative to reduce social interaction
When a person's mind becomes more and more mature, he will see that "loneliness" is the normal state of life, and he will automatically reduce the amount of social interaction he needs to get together for a short time.
Of course, maturity also means seeing "human nature", that is, knowing that not all friendships are worth the time and effort, so I will actively reduce social time.
Therefore, they spend their time running their own lives, playing badminton with their wives, making their children laugh, or developing their hobbies and laughing at themselves.
When your mind is mature, you will naturally give up, do subtraction for your life, reduce unnecessary people and things, no longer pursue the base of friends, but focus on quality.
Thought may have matured along with seeing many things, perhaps having experienced the suppression of human nature, and seeing the social truth through reluctance.
Erlong was once a rich second generation. At that time, he was a group of good brothers. They always ate together and talked about their ideals.
For this group of good friends, Erlong gave his sincerity, so when a good friend is in trouble, he is always generous.
However, the brotherhood he thought was indestructible could not stand a little test.
There was a problem with Erlong's house, which caused all his bank cards to be frozen, and the good brothers played "missing" when they knew the situation of his house.
After an education from reality, Erlong can clearly see the word human nature.
Later, Erlong's family went through a difficult time, all good brothers came to visit, but Erlong decided to cut off diplomatic relations, so he seldom spends his time on socializing.
When your mind is mature, you can judge which people and things should stay and which people and things should say goodbye.
3. There are new tasks in life
Every stage has its own tasks. When I was a child, I was busy learning various life skills. When I was a child, I was busy with studying. After graduation, I was busy with work.
People who don't have a family have a lot of time for various social activities.
But when a person becomes a family, especially after having children, they will reduce social interaction and focus on family because of new tasks in life.
Before a mother has no children, she may still find time to go shopping and take a walk with her best friends, but when she becomes a mother, she does not have so much time for herself, because the children are still young and need her care.
Even though not all women will become full-time mothers, after commuting to and from get off work, her full concern for her children will make her take the initiative to reduce social interaction and dislike social interaction in order to fulfill her mother's responsibilities.
A person may not spend less time socializing because he has children, but because he has new topics in his life.Xu Shi met someone who wanted to take care of him for the rest of his life, so he spent all his time on the pursuit; Xu Shi had a new plan for his life and career, in order to make his dream come true, reduce unnecessary time expenditure...
For the vast majority of people For example, become socially averse for the third reason.
When a person becomes less and less social, it often means that he has matured his mind, found a new mission in life, and found someone who will accompany him all his life.
People who don't like to socialize are not necessarily lonely, maybe they are especially wonderful in places that outsiders can't see.
Although life may not be everything, but fortunately there are choices, so that we can seize the life we want the most.
END
I am Hexu, a creator in the emotional realm with a warm and happy heart. I write emotional articles and use words to warm my heart. Thank you for reading, and I sincerely wish you peace and joy!
