First of all, in psychological counseling work, it is very important for clients to trust the counselor. Trust is a very important foundation.
Once the client does not trust the counselor, the consultation will be easily interrupted.
01
So, how can counselors better make clients trust themselves?
1. Comply with psychological counseling ethics
For psychological counselors, complying with counseling ethics is a very important part for the counselor. This is a very important part for the establishment of the counseling relationship and for strengthening the trust of the client.
For example, according to counseling ethics, the counselor needs to keep confidential the content, but the counselor breaks the confidentiality exception.
It is possible that after we have finished talking to the child, we will tell the parents everything we talked about, so that the child will feel unsafe with us, and then he will not be willing to come over next time.
Therefore, we cannot not abide by the ethics of psychological counseling just because we are consulting in schools. In that case, the effectiveness of our counseling will be compromised.
Even when consulting in schools, we still have to adhere to the ethical settings of psychological counseling. This is an important part of promoting clients' trust in psychological counselors.
2. Enrich life experience
Sometimes, in consultation, especially family therapy, the client may doubt the counselor's ability from the beginning.
For example, if they see that the counselor is very young and has not even given birth to a child, they will think that the counselor does not have children himself, so how can he intervene in their family?
For example, some clients feel that the counselor has not entered the marriage, so how can he intervene in their marital relationship problems?
Therefore, when counselors appear to have no relevant experience, clients will not trust us.
So we say that as psychological counselors, our experience is our wealth. The richer our experience, the easier it is for us to be trusted by our clients.
Generally in foreign countries, many people do not become psychological counselors until they are 30 years old. An important part of this is related to life experience.
When the counselor has enough life experience, it will be helpful to deal with certain parts of the consultation.
3. Improve competency
In addition, if the counselor has not received sufficient psychological training, our competency will also be affected.
For example, if a counselor does family therapy without systematically conducting family therapy related training, then there will be difficulties.
Therefore, counselors need to undergo systematic psychology, psychological counseling and related professional training to improve our personal competence, which can enhance the trust of our clients in us.
4. Seeing the client’s needs
We see that there are many reasons why the client does not trust the counselor. Of course, this may also come from the client himself, who is not easy to trust others.
For example, if a gay client comes to you for consultation, he will worry about whether you can understand him or discriminate against him if you are not gay.
For example, one of the confusions a visitor has when he wants to come for consultation is interpersonal problems. He lacks trust in others, which is also an important reason for his interpersonal conflicts.
Therefore, when the client does not trust the counselor, the counselor can also learn more about the client and see the client's inner needs.
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When we are suspected or distrusted by our clients, how should we counselors deal with or face it?
For example, if the client suspects that we are inexperienced because we are not married or have children, then how should the counselor deal with this part?
Here is a suggestion:
We can express it this way: "Although I am not married and have no children, I have been systematically trained in this area, and I also have experience working with many families.
Although I am not married and have no children, I was once a child, so I can experience such a process. "
That is, on the one hand, we still need to truthfully tell the visitors our true situation, and on the other hand, we can tell the visitors our relevant experiences to increase their trust in us.
If the visitor still has doubts, one strategy we can try is to do it three times. We can say to the visitor:
"We can try to work three times. If after working three times, you If you feel that I can help you, then we can continue to work. If you still feel that you do not trust me, you can refer you to other consultants. "
When we make this arrangement, we also give the visitor more time to get to know us, and ultimately respect the visitor's decision.
Organized by: Wu Jiayi, Su Jian
Editor: Su Jian
Content source: Excerpts from Shen Jiahong’s systematic dynamic family therapy training course
