Life needs romance, life needs relaxation, life needs happiness... How to make life full of sunshine every day without appearing so rigid? Please read the humorous jokes, which will be updated every day. Please stay tuned. From now on, your life will be more beautiful, happy and

Life needs romance, life needs relaxation, life needs happiness... How to make life full of sunshine every day without appearing so restrained? Please read the humorous jokes, which will be updated every day. Please pay attention. From now on, your life will be more beautiful, happy and romantic...

01

Son: "Look at Wang Sicong's hugs before going out, how grand they are!"

Dad: "Your pomp is no worse than his. If nothing else, you need six servants to take medicine when you were a child!"

Son: "Why? What a joke? "

Dad: "Grandpa and grandma will take care of the left and right feet, grandpa and grandma will take care of the left and right hands, and mom will take care of the head while squatting on a horse. I will first use a bamboo piece to pry your mouth open, and then use a syringe to inject the mixed liquid from the gap between the teeth! "

son: "..."

02

When I was waiting for the bus at work this morning, I heard a person on the side of the road ask: 360 doesn't make sports shoes, why are you fighting with QQ?

Another person said: I have never understood the quarrel between a shoe maker and a car maker.

I quickly went up and said: "It's not inflation, the price of rubber has gone up so high."

03

Today, the most beautiful classmate in our class got married! I remember when I was in high school, I chased her for three years. One day she sent me a text in English: If you never abandon, I will in life and death.

I was not good at English, so I asked my deskmate to translate. The deskmate said: If you don’t leave me, I will die with you!

I was heartbroken and never contacted her again. To this day, that paragraph of English is written on the huge screen at the wedding venue again!

What’s terrible is that today I found out that sentence is: If you never leave me, I will depend on you for life and death! The groom is the deskmate who translated for me back then.

04

At eight o'clock in the afternoon, Feifei was preparing to pack up and get off work.

Mom called and said: "Daughter, you go out to eat with your friends tonight, and don't go home before ten o'clock."

Feifei: "Mom, did something happen at home?"

Mom: "It's okay, it's just your dad and Uncle Zhang who were drinking. Your dad bragged about you guys. The company has sent you to study at the Australian headquarters."

Feifei: "I understand, Mom!"

05

My wife went back to her parents' house on Sunday, and I thought I could sleep freely and play games with my friends when I got up.

But when I got up, I found a note from my wife on the bedside table: Dear, there is a power outage today. Please wash those dirty clothes with your hands and clean up again.

When I saw that it was indeed out of power, I thought it would be good to do some work and exercise.

My wife came back in the afternoon and smiled with satisfaction after seeing the fruits of my labor. Then I watched her turn on the switch.

06

There was an elegantly dressed woman who went to the employment agency and said to the staff: "I need a man to do housework."

"How many people do you have at home? What do you need to do on a daily basis?"

"There are only two people at home, my niece and I." The woman said, "The work is cleaning, shopping for food, and laundry, and it is not too much work. Much. However, you have to work hard and be absolutely obedient. "

" Oh! The clerk thought for a moment and said, "Then would it be better to find a husband?" ”

Woman: “It’s okay to find a husband! ”

07

A landlord couple, famously stingy.
One day, a man went to the city and wanted to go to the toilet while walking, but then he thought: Such good fertilizer cannot be made cheap for others. So I kept holding it in.
Later I couldn’t hold it in any longer and went to the restroom. But apart from a few farts, nothing came out. So I felt very proud.
returned home and told his wife about his experience.
Unexpectedly, my wife was furious when she heard this: You prodigal, how can you live like this? It would be great to save these farts to blow out the lamp!

08

Yesterday, my sister and I were watching TV at home. Finally, she grabbed the remote control and happily tuned to the children's channel, but the cartoon had already finished.

She shouted at me angrily: "What kind of bad sister are you! I don't want you anymore! I'm going to bury you!"

I glanced at her calmly: "Hmm, as the saying goes, you will reap melons if you sow melons, and you will reap beans if you sow beans. Today next year, you will have a harvest of a hundred sisters!"

She burst into tears instantly and said, "I don't want to live anymore..."

09

My brother got a girlfriend in high school, but my parents insisted not to have early love and put academics first, so my brother was depressed.

later became inseparable from a male classmate, doing homework together with the door closed, and even washing his classmate's shorts after playing ball together.

My mother was in a panic. She suspected that my brother liked a man. After weighing it for a long time, she asked my brother to find his old girlfriend.

Some time ago, my brother got married, and the best man was that male classmate.

010

I told my mother that I wanted to buy a computer. She said: Why buy a new one if your computer isn’t broken?

Me: It’s too heavy to carry back and forth. If you have two, put one at school and one at home. This will save a lot of trouble every time you go home.

She said: Farewell, why don't I just buy another child and put it at home, and you can go to school with peace of mind. You don't have to run back and forth, which will save trouble.

Me:...

Henan Happy Little Fish, I like to collect humorous jokes and headlines. I hope that the humorous jokes every day will not only bring you happiness, but also make you realize many truths in life. The road is long and long, and I will explore it from top to bottom. As I continue to work hard from now on, your support, attention, likes, and interaction in the comment area are indispensable. Here's a shout out: Thank you!

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