1 "Are you having trouble with your relationship?" "It's going well, there's no one around all the way." 2 One of my brothers' girlfriends are twins. One time, I went to my girlfriend's house. After lunch, I was lying on the sofa for a nap. My girlfriend's sister wanted to test m

1 "Are you having trouble with your relationship?"

"It's going well, there's no one around on the road."

2 One of my buddy's girlfriends are twins. One time, the buddy went to his girlfriend's house,

After lunch, he was lying on the sofa for a nap, and his girlfriend's sister wanted to test him, so he walked by

Go and say: "My dear, my sister and I look so alike.

Who do you think is more beautiful between us?" The brother was confused and to please his girlfriend,

said carelessly: "Of course it's you, you see she looks like a fool!"

3 A friend of mine drives an excavator, and one time he paid 3,900 for a private job. The uncle said: It's just right. I'll get the money. You can find a hundred yuan and give it to me first. I didn't really react at the time, so I took out my wallet and thought something was wrong. Uncle, are you planning to give me a 4,000 dollar bill?

4 I took a friend out, and the engine stalled when changing gears uphill. I restarted it and stalled it again. I tried not to embarrass myself in front of my friends, but the more anxious I became, the more it couldn't start. I was so anxious that I was sweating profusely. In desperation, I got out of the car and stopped the car, and begged the driver behind me to drive uphill for me. People told me that the reason why I couldn't drive uphill was because I forgot to put down the handbrake .

5. I was taking a nap at home over the weekend. I was sleeping soundly when I heard the cry of a child. When I opened my eyes, my head was covered with a white sheet. There were a few oranges and apples on the bedside table next to me, and a few watercolor pens inserted into my water glass! The eldest nephew and several children said, "Second uncle! You died so miserably." I fainted! !

6 When I was queuing up to do nucleic acid tests, I found that the person in front of me had dropped his keys.

So I reminded him: "Boss, you dropped your key."

Because my Mandarin was poor, I said the key was dangerous.

When the person in front heard this, he said angrily: "How can you be like this? Cursing others to die, do you have any cultivation?"

I quickly defended myself and said: "It's not that you want to die, but that you want to die."

The man stared and said viciously: "If you dare to say that again, let's see if I don't beat you."

I grabbed his sleeve, pointed to the ground and said, "I'm reminding you, yours is going to die."

He looked at it and quickly picked it up. The people around burst into laughter.

7When beggar clothes first became popular, I bought the clothes which were very trendy at the time. Who would have thought that one day when I got on the bus, I accidentally knelt down when I got to the steps. The driver was stunned. A handsome guy stepped forward and helped me up: "It's okay, I'll let you sit without paying." I...

8What does this have to do with whose pond belongs

Ergou dug a pond next to the house to raise fish. On summer nights, the toads in the pond screamed, making him sleepless.

In a fit of anger, he sold Chi Lu to someone else. He thought he would be able to sleep peacefully now.

Unexpectedly, as soon as it got dark, the toads continued to make a loud noise.

He was annoyed and angry, and couldn't figure it out. He cursed: It's so strange, Chi Lu has been sold to someone else, why is this toad still bothering me?

9 I work in a bank, and my colleagues made me cry in anger at work today.

A customer happened to withdraw money. I choked and said, "What kind of business are you doing?"

The customer replied: "Withdraw 50,000 yuan." I was still angry and tears could not stop flowing.

The customer hurriedly said: "No, no, I won't take it anymore, keep the money!"

10Seeing the familiar phrase "Never Separate" carved with a knife on the old banyan tree in the park, I turned to my wife: "Wife, do you still remember this? "Yes," the wife said with a smile. "Of course you remembered it back then." I couldn't help but feel sweet in my heart: "It's been so many years, and we really haven't separated." My wife lowered her head, and her thoughts seemed to go back to many years ago: "Yes, I knew you carried a knife even when you went on a date. Who dared to point it out?" ml1

12 There were two mental patients. They escaped from the hospital.

The two ran and ran and climbed up a tree.

One of them jumped down from the tree.

Rolling and rolling.

Then he raised his head and said to the person above: Hello----

Why don't you come down?

The person above answered him: No---Okay--ah---I'm not mature yet---